Talking to Kids About God

I'm a practicing Catholic. So why does the subject of religion make me so uncomfortable?

By Kathleen Deveny | NEWSWEEK

Feb 11, 2008 Issue

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Posted By: WandaBall @ 03/01/2008 5:17:44 PM

Comment: This article was exactly why my book "Kids Ask The Darndest Things About God And The Beginning" was written! Sex shouldn't be an easier subject to talk about with our kids because God created life and sex for procreation in the beginning. "Kids Ask The Darndest Things About God And The Beginning" would help to answer these questions easily and truthfully about death, life and everyday occurrences that go on in kids daily lives and not feel lost or uncomfortable talking about it. And my book will also educate you with misconceptions and lessons missed while you were a child attending church. I share the exact scripture that answers our everyday questions yet simplify the answers so we all, parents and kids, can understand. I believe that once the parent has this resource then the child will feel at ease when asking questions of ANY sort, because they know it's the truth. You can find "Kids Ask The Darndest Things About God And The Beginning" at www.amazon.com or my site at: www.ball-publications.com for more info. May God Bless!
Posted By: WandaBall @ 03/01/2008 5:08:57 PM

Comment: This article was exactly the reason why my book, "Kids Ask The Darndest Things About God And The Beginning" was written! Sex shouldn't be a easier subject to talk about with our kids because God created life and sex for procreation in the beginning. "Kids Ask The Darndest Things About God And The Beginning" would help her to answer these questions easily and truthfully about death, life and everyday occurrences that go on in kids daily lives and not feel lost or uncomfortable talking about it. And my book will also educate you with misconceptions and lessons missed while you were a child attending church. I believe that once the parent has this resource then the child will feel at ease when asking questions of any sort, because they know it's the truth. You can find "Kids Ask The Darndest Things About God And The Beginning" at: www.amazon.com or my website at: www.ball-publications.com for more info. May God Bless you!
Posted By: brianjbyrne @ 02/27/2008 3:02:05 PM

Comment: Kathleen - If you are interested to learn more about your Faith you might consider asking your Pastor if you could audit their RCIA program - basically CCD for adults. The Catechism is also a great reference for doctrinal questions, such as on the theory of evolution. It provides and explains the Teaching of the Church.

Pax et bonum

Pax et bonum
Posted By: brianjbyrne @ 02/27/2008 2:52:56 PM

Comment: Quick Quote - Humani Generis, Pope Pius XII, 1950 AD

"...the Teaching Authority of the Church does not forbid that, in conformity with the present state of human sciences and sacred theology, research and discussions, on the part of men experienced in both fields, take place with regard to the doctrine of evolution, in as far as it inquires into the origin of the human body as coming from pre-existent and living matter -- for the Catholic faith obliges us to hold that souls are immediately created by God. However this must be done in such a way that the reasons for both opinions, that is, those favorable and those unfavorable to evolution, be weighed and judged with the necessary seriousness, moderation and measure, and provided that all are prepared to submit to the judgment of the Church, to whom Christ has given the mission of interpreting authentically the Sacred Scriptures and of defending the dogmas of faithful[11] Some however rashly transgress this liberty of discussion, when they act as if the origin of the human body from preexisting and living matter were already completely certain and proved by the facts which have been discovered up to now and by reasoning on those facts, and as if there were nothing in the sources of divine revelation which demands the greatest moderation and caution in this question."

Catholic Church Teaching Authority does not hold the theory of evolution to be a fraud, but is in fact open to the possibility of human evolution with respect to the physical body.

Pax et bonum
Posted By: Azhar @ 02/27/2008 5:20:57 AM

Comment: sorry i couldnt complete...as a continuation i would comment that parents sets the tone! ...if parents are themselves ambiguous in their beleifs , ambiguities will endure in the child's mind...so how should parents know their reason for existance? the answer is ? its wat u will find in islam ...the fastest growing religion of the world today...This .....is the truth ...accept it and u will will find tranquility for sure >>
Posted By: Azhar @ 02/27/2008 5:11:06 AM

Comment: sad but true., most of the people don't know their reason of birth. The truth is that...we are not born at "random" .we have a purpose to live . that purpose is not to earn wealth , gain knowledgeor live a happy life..we , as muslims beleive in the life after death ...that life depends on what you sow here in this world full of illusions...
Posted By: dakaran @ 02/22/2008 12:16:26 PM

Comment: I was saddened to read your article and realize that many people probably feel as you do. It seems to me that maybe the trouble you have with your religion (and explaining it) is that you are using your life to define your religion instead of your religion to define your life. Religions tend to have a completeness or perfection about them which those that adhere to them strive for. However, if your life defines your religion - what is acceptable and what is not, then, by your own admission, you are at a loss to answer questions that don't coincide with what you truly believe about life in general, and yours in particular.
Posted By: GustoMaybe @ 02/19/2008 9:28:59 AM

Comment: I was raised in the Episcopal church, not TOO different from Catholic. Your concerns sound very familiar to me!

Recently I did a study circle with some friends in town using a workbook called "Reflections on the Life of the Spirit", organized by the local Baha'i community. It was very enlightening. Nothing contradicted what I learned in church and there was a lot of insights into the soul and the soul's relationship to God, not to mention the "Does God have arms" kind of questions!

You should really see when there might be a study of "Reflections on the Life of the Spirit" in your town.

-Jeff
Posted By: gdk321 @ 02/14/2008 12:49:21 AM

Comment: If we're "stumped" why do we give in to our impulse to give an answer? Why, when responding to our children, must we constantly try to provide the definitive solution? There is an element of dishonesty when we feed this impulse. Our interactions with our children give us numerous opportunities to be honest with ourselves, but time and time again, we fail to do so. If the depth of your soul can't summons an answer, use the opportunity to explore this mystery with your child, and let that child see that you don't have all the answers.
Posted By: tedduncan3 @ 02/13/2008 9:55:03 AM

Comment: It just goes to prove what the bible says about the path to heaven being narrow and few finding it. So heaven does not have to be a very large place.
Posted By: jcpm @ 02/11/2008 9:35:29 PM

Comment: For those interested in finding answers the the spiritual problems that many are encountering, there is a web site with Biblical facts to help those searching for Bible facts: www.jcpm.com under Bible studies
Posted By: mck35 @ 02/11/2008 1:05:35 PM

Comment: Kathleen Deveny says she'll never teach her daughter that evolution is a fraud ("Talking to Kids About God," Feb. 11). I have good news: the Catholic Church isn't asking her to. Deveny doesn't need to memorize the Catechism of the Catholic Church, but she might refer to paragraph 283, which says scientific studies have "splendidly enriched our knowledge of the age and dimensions of the cosmos, the development of life-forms and the appearance of man." The Catholic Church does not consider evolution a "fraud," as Deveny claims -- it teaches evolution in its schools. As Bishop Francis X. DiLorenzo has written, "Students should be able to leave their biology classes, and their courses in religious instruction, with an integrated understanding of the means God chose to make us who we are."

Further, I would like to express my concern and dismay that Newsweek's fact checkers did not catch this error in the representation of Catholic faith and theology.
- Posted By: silkentent @ 02/11/2008 19:43:08
  
  Comment:
  mck35 comments: Further, I would like to express my concern and dismay that Newsweek's fact checkers did not catch this error in the representation of Catholic faith and theology.
  
  This is not a news story, it's a personal essay. Does fact checking apply? I am dismayed that the comments thread has devolved into a discussion of evolution. My dismay with the essay is that it shows me a mother who is obviouly affluent, educated, and well-employed, yet comes across as a mother who approaches child rearing as a hobby. Read some of her other "Modern Family" pieces, especially the one about shopping for Christmas gifts, where she "piously" tells her daughter she can't have a laptop but then buys her a boxfull of trinkets for the child's collection of plush pets (and congratulates herself for not going over her budget because she doesn't have a budget..Or the one about the problem of a pregnant Jamie Lynn Spears, in which Deveny writes,"I have faith that children learn values at home, and that my years of brainwashing will have far more effect on her than one knocked-up TV starlet. " Years of brainwashing? I thought she wanted to teach her daughter to think critically. Oh yeah, I already observed that "thinking critically" means thinking just like her.
  
  Deveny is either a hypocrite or a lazy writer or both.
Posted By: kcarizona @ 02/11/2008 6:12:51 AM

Comment: But in defense of Catholics if in any way it seems that i am on the attack let me say that some of the best people i know are Catholics. my momma is catholic and she is the closest thing to a saint i have every met. It all goes back to personal flavors, my mom likes the flavor of the church and when i visit her so do i and when i am on my own i go back to other flavors - thats just me - i have never told my mom to leave the church or try this or that - there is no need - she is happy and what if i was really concerned like her soul was in jeapordy or something silly like that i would be talking to my Daddy in heaven (prayer) about it and not her and believe me long ago that was exactly what i was doing until he spoke to me and i am at peace as she prayes on in the Catholic church which is cool for her but again a game that i just couldn't play not wrong just not for me. i like mint chocolate chip ice cream and she likes strawberry, i like strawberry too but if i have my preference i will eat mint chip and we both enjoy a cup of ice cream just different flavors.
Posted By: kcarizona @ 02/11/2008 5:27:12 AM

Comment: I will hand you that - Catholics must be the smartest people on earth. i was raised Catholic and everytime i asked for answers i got some serious homework. i always admire the intense brain food going around in the Catholic church it is seriously deep like an ocean. i just don't have what it takes to stick with a religion that made me jump so many hurdles that i constantly found myself on the floor with skinned knees and bloody lips. i cannot curse the game and the hurdles that were set up just because i couldn't run the game well but admire those who are so smart and able to swing such a technical obstical course with apparant ease. i look to the big boy ballers in government like i used to look to the priest as an alter boy and trust that they were playing right because i did not understand all of the ins and outs just that i was called to serve and if it didn't work out i would pick up a bus to st. elsewhere and try to get over my shame at not living up to the expectations of those over me. i am confident that Hillary is the one to lead us and i am confident to serve in my small ways - i pray she is shooting straight because regardless the truth comes out into the light sooner or later yo.
Posted By: seacmolt @ 02/11/2008 4:06:33 AM

Comment: Kathleen,

I hope in your future education of your daughter in critical thinking, you arm her with the facts. Your statement (implied) that the Catholic Church has as one of its tenant's that evolution is a fraud, is patently WRONG! The most recent statement (July 25, 2007) on the debate between Catholic faith and evolution made by Pope Benedict declared ???This clash is an absurdity because on one hand there is much scientific proof in favor of evolution, which appears as a reality that we must see and which enriches our understanding of life and being as such.??? He said evolution did not answer all the questions: ???Above all it does not answer the great philosophical question, ???Where does everything come from??????? No Pope, nor the Catechism has ever stated that evolution was a fraud.

Pope John Paul II stated eloquently the Church's stand on all things scientific; "Reason illuminates faith, and faith illuminates reason." Since you are a "cafeteria catholic", I suggest you sit down and enjoy the bountiful salad bar of catholic intellectual thought and critical thinking (If you read some St. Augustine and St. Thomas Aquinas you might think the Catholic Church invented critical thinking.) Try reading the encyclicals Evangelium Vitea (The Gospel of Life) and Humanea Vitea (On Human Life).

My education in my faith began when my daughter was born. Part of that education was in response to the miracle of birth I had witnessed, and part was to prepare myself for those questions that my children would undoubtedly ask.

If you think you can teach your child to think critically about momentous life questions without giving them the facts from an educated faith perspective, you have ignored a gift of 2000 years of intellectual thought.

Good luck to you, and God bless you on your journey.

Steve M
Posted By: seacmolt @ 02/11/2008 4:05:54 AM

Comment: Kathleen,

I hope in your future education of your daughter in critical thinking, you arm her with the facts. Your statement (implied) that the Catholic Church has as one of its tenant's that evolution is a fraud, is patently WRONG! The most recent statement (July 25, 2007) on the debate between Catholic faith and evolution made by Pope Benedict declared ???This clash is an absurdity because on one hand there is much scientific proof in favor of evolution, which appears as a reality that we must see and which enriches our understanding of life and being as such.??? He said evolution did not answer all the questions: ???Above all it does not answer the great philosophical question, ???Where does everything come from??????? No Pope, nor the Catechism has ever stated that evolution was a fraud.

Pope John Paul II stated eloquently the Church's stand on all things scientific; "Reason illuminates faith, and faith illuminates reason." Since you are a "cafeteria catholic", I suggest you sit down and enjoy the bountiful salad bar of catholic intellectual thought and critical thinking (If you read some St. Augustine and St. Thomas Aquinas you might think the Catholic Church invented critical thinking.) Try reading the encyclicals Evangelium Vitea (The Gospel of Life) and Humanea Vitea (On Human Life).

My education in my faith began when my daughter was born. Part of that education was in response to the miracle of birth I had witnessed, and part was to prepare myself for those questions that my children would undoubtedly ask.

If you think you can teach your child to think critically about momentous life questions without giving them the facts from an educated faith perspective, you have ignored a gift of 2000 years of intellectual thought.

Good luck to you, and God bless you on your journey.

Steve M.
Posted By: kcarizona @ 02/11/2008 1:03:12 AM

Comment: A very well respected doctor friend of mine Dr. V. once said in cool down to earth reality (my favorite) is "Keep it real" Those simple words always work for me when i share my faith to others. Real is i don't know if i am right or wrong or have all the answers , real is i am a weak shallow and evil person who is only going to heaven because of what Jesus did 2000 years ago for me PERIOD. i don't try and be fake and act like i am something i am not and my faith says that is cool no matter what God loves me and is always there for me -not because of the building i sit in or the $ i drop in or the hours i volunteer in a shelter but because of what Jesus did - again - PERIOD. If it were complicated or tough to figure out i would have to say I'm out but God called fools and babes, prostitutes and pimps, and whoverer with a my yoke is easy and my burden is light I am the way the truth and life message - yeah easy that is what i need and i can keep the Real. If you keep it real you cannot help but share your faith because it is real and not some Fake scam i smell a rat a thon. Thank God he is merciful and forgives me daily cause if anyone needs it is me. As far as Muslim or Jew or whatever - i am not God and i am not worried about trying to convert anyone - hey if i could hack all of the rules and regulations of the other religions i would but i am weak sauce and Jesus is a good sheperd who makes it easy to follow - His rod and His staff they comfort me.
Posted By: silkentent @ 02/10/2008 1:18:52 PM

Comment: As a cafeteria Catholic, perhaps you've been spending too much time at the appetizer bar. What makes you think the church teaches that evolution is a fraud? According to George Coyne, a Jesuit priest, astronomer, and director of the Vatican observatory, evolution, not intelligent design, is the fundamental church teaching. (http://www.catholic.org/national/national_story.php?id=18524) And I have a suspicion that "thinking critically" means that you hope your daughter will adopt a stance less conservative than the traditional Catholic position on the issues you enumerate, a stance that probably reflects you own position. (And why will this encouragement to critical thinking come "someday," rather than right now? How are you encouraging the child to think now?)

You say you think you'll have an easier time answering your daughter's questions about sex than about religion because you know where babies come from but remain uncertain on the details about God. Educating children about sex requires more than just telling them the mechanics of how the baby gets into the mother. as parents, we must also transmit our values about intimacy, faithfulness, and the responsibilities one takes one when one chooses to engage in this way with another person. In the same way, educating children about matters of faith requires more than merely taking them to a weekly event (at least in the winter) and exposing them to the lists of the rules and practices of a single denomination. We must be cleaar about our own values and beliefs concerning our relationship with the divine before we can help our children develop an enduring one that gives them hope and joy in the sometimes harsh and lonely world.
Posted By: kcarizona @ 02/09/2008 11:57:22 PM

Comment: You take a nice picture and are a most beautiful woman if i may say so.
Posted By: Sads404 @ 02/09/2008 3:21:55 PM

Comment: Kathleen:

Could it be that you (and others) are uncomfortable with religion (God) because deep down you know you don't have real answers? Anyone that says they know God exists, or futher knows his or her mind is obviously lying. After all, faith means 'Belief that does not rest on logical proof or material evidence'.

For anyone to say we have souls, and that they know what happens to the soul after death is lying. If you claim the Bible or for that matter any other religious text (man has invented many Gods and religions), then all you are doing (in the case of the Bible) is living according to the writings of *man* at a time when the wheelbarrow was emerging technology. A time when we knew nothing about the origins of storms, eathquakes and sickness. Things we had to attribute to something and that something was religion and a God. All civilizations have invented them.

Most people who say they live by the Bible in this day, are forced to pick and choose the bits that fit. *They*, are the moral gatekeeper, not the Bible itself. After all the Bible condones, slavery, ethnic cleansing, murder and rape. To live your life as the Bible says, we would be stoning poeple who work on Sunday or as in Deuteronomy 13, muder anyone who tries to lead you away from God.

13:9 But thou shalt surely kill him; thine hand shall be first upon him to put him to death, and afterwards the hand of all the people.

13:10 And thou shalt stone him with stones, that he die; because he hath sought to thrust thee away from the LORD thy God, which brought thee out of the land of Egypt, from the house of bondage.

A tougher question from your child might be (Numbers 15).

Why did they stone that poor man for gathering sticks on Sunday?
Posted By: JSHADE @ 02/07/2008 11:23:14 PM

Comment: I am no scientist, and I do not therefore dismiss all of evolution. But one would think that we would have found at least one example of it occuring in the last several thousand years. And by it, I mean one animal that actually turns into another animal through random trial and error. Sadly, I think the scientists push the toto theory of evolution with more dogma than the Church pushed the whole flat earth thing. I mean - not one animal or fossil that shows the leap from one animal to another, yet we all somehow spawned from the plankton of the sea? I haven't even touched on the failure of evolution to begin to explain how something (the galaxy) came out of nothing. Is critical thinking really satiated by simply arguing that a dust cloud preceeded the galazy? I mean doesn't anybody wonder how the dust cloud was created? Really and truly the existance of something implies a creator, and I haven't heard one yet that explains how we get something without a creator?
- Posted By: Sads404 @ 02/09/2008 14:55:40
  
  Comment: JShade:
  
  1 last point. To help you along, the Theory of Evolution does not speak to nor does it attempt to answer the the origins of our Galaxy, the formation of the Earth and planets of for that matter the start of life (abiogenesis). I'm an Engineer and not a scientist in the area of Biology, but I do tend to make an attempt to understand things first before I attempt to find problems with the Theory.
  
  And if you must have a creator, what was the origins of the creator?
- Posted By: Sads404 @ 02/09/2008 14:46:55
  
  Comment: JSHADE:
  
  I tried to find one thing on your comments concerning Evolution that would indicate you knew *anything* about it. Please ediucate yourself then take another stab at it. Some helpfull places to start:
  
  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ring_species
  
  http://www.talkorigins.org/origins/welcome.html
  
  http://www-news.uchicago.edu/releases/06/060405.tiktaalik.shtml
  
  Also, research Human chromosone #2 and how it came to be in its present form (via fusion).
Posted By: JSHADE @ 02/07/2008 11:10:15 PM

Comment: It sounds like your child's questions are leading to explore your chosen religion, which may be the answer to your problem. As a Catholic, I have found the answers to all church teaching, especially on moral issues, to be completely compatible with critical analysis. For instance you suggest that your daughter should critically think about issues like abortion versus thinking doctrinally. However, some of the best critical thinking on these issues comes from Church doctrine and catholic Popes, priests, sisters, and scholars who articulate very sound defenses of that teaching. Inviting un-informed "critical thinking" too often means justifying what we want to do.

May I suggest that When you describe yourself as a "cafeteria catholic," what you are really saying is that you make up your own religion which is loosly based on the Catholic teaching that you agree with. But since you haven't likely developed your own doctrine, you are left with an uncomforatable feeling when asked about religion by your daughter. I would suggest that you explore the rationale behind the teachings of the church that you find too restrictive, and that you pray on those teachings, and that you take a leap of faith and actually practice those teachings for a period time - say 6 mos or a year. If at the end of that time you can return in prayer to those teachings and justify ignoring them, then you have at least tried your faith before rejecting it. You can also then share with your daughter the real consequences of following or not following the church's teaching on a particular issue. One of the things that the church teaches is that getting your family members to heaven is primary purpose of the parental role.
Posted By: lynng1 @ 02/06/2008 9:12:35 PM

Comment: Not comfortable to share the Word of God with her own children? Seriously, Miss Deveny needs to get in touch with her religion more.
Posted By: mamasboy @ 02/06/2008 12:10:43 PM

Comment: dutchbu,
Just where does your "evidence" come from, if not from the experience of life and all it entails.?
To simply shrug off thousands of years of human experience regarding the soul is not using critical thought. You merely show a rather nasty bias against these very real and very human experiences, which when examined critically, lead one to see that there is more to human life than the mere physical aspect of it, wonderful as that is.

Your attacks on the Church are more of the same. The usual one-liners that offer no depth of critical thought, no attempt to look deeply into history to discover the truth, and show again a nastiness and bias which seems to keep you from getting past simply slinging the most superficial, negative summaries of that which you oppose.
Posted By: mphilly @ 02/05/2008 11:30:46 PM

Comment: Kathleen:
My parents (Mom, at least) was quite diligent in bringing us kids to Church every Sunday at an early age. But my childhood memories don't really capture God coming home with us as a part of our daily lives. It may be for this lack of my parents' living their faith that I fell away from the Church, and God entirely, for 2 decades (the man of science commenter below was me 10 years ago) . I am married and have young children of my own now, and it is because of these blessings that I started returning to the Church. One thing I realize in my rediscovered spirituality is that the most important thing is this world is grow your relationship with the Lord...all else flourishes with this. Sunday Mass, Church doctrine, Catechism are all fantastic aids in understanding the Lord; but they are no substitute for prayer...talking to the Lord daily about His will for your life. I don't know you, but I remember what it was like to live without the Lord's presence by my side. Although you consider yourself a Catholic, your short article hints at the lack of a personal relationship with Him. It is wonderful that you want to expose your daughter to the Church, but to truly give her a meaningful faith that consists of more than Sunday attendance, the best thing for her is to see your example of what it means to live the faith. I hope that your Parish offers retreats, group studies, etc that could help you spark your prayer life.... or you could talk to members of your Parish who shine with the Spirit, they will love to share with you (we are literally on the Eve of the Lenten Season, which is a perfect time to draw nearer to God's presence). Now you are a fairly high-profile writer with, I am sure, an unbelievably hectic schedule. But since you regularly attend Sunday Mass you already know that having a personal relationship with God is by far the most important thing you can possibly do with your time....far more important than making that next Newsweek deadline. So turn the computer off and start talking to Him! May God Bless you on your journey!
Posted By: mjoconnor @ 02/05/2008 9:38:53 PM

Comment: To talk to anyone about God, denomination (Catholic or another) becomes less important and the truth as outlined in Scripture (the Bible) should be the focal point. The Bible says that Jesus Christ came to earth, lived a perfect, sinless life, died on the cross for our sins, and was raised from the dead by God. When you put your faith in Jesus Christ as Savior, you have eternal life. The living Word of God is your best guide.
- Posted By: Sads404 @ 02/09/2008 15:49:51
  
  Comment: mjoconnor :
  
  The Bible also has so much bad in it. Just how do you filter or otherwise choose what to use as a guide and what not to?
Posted By: dutchbu @ 02/05/2008 1:36:56 PM

Comment: Mamasboy,
Notice how you did not use words like evidence or knowledge (instead using experience and thought). Even you know that these words would hardly be applicable to the issue at hand, or at least not in your favor.

Instead of telling a child (or yourself) what a fictional book says about the issue, tell them what we KNOW. Tell them about the EVIDENCE for the evolution of our species and the incredible things we now KNOW about the brain and nervous system. Stories of souls and shape shifting Jesus blood will not help your child learn anything.

Your original post was a laughable ode to critical thought within the Catholic Church. But you have confused critical thought with being forced to change with the times. The Catholic Church, like most others, embodies the opposite of critical thought. The best example is your church???s awful history of destroying or hiding all evidence that contradicts your religious texts and decrees. Or, how about the habit of declaring people and books infallible?

Perhaps worst of all, and certainly outside the realm of critical thought, religion constantly seeks to interject the forces of magic into every conversation. I suggest everyone be honest with their children by first being honest with themselves (corny, but so true).
Posted By: engineersb @ 02/05/2008 12:26:46 PM

Comment: No wonder that we have children who are experts in sex , drugs and immoral issues than the fundamental way of living- respect for individuals and others. They know more about these things from K.G. but lack the basics of God and His Son Jesus Christ and even so they pride in their lack of that knowledge. Ungrateful creatures!! Add to that are parents who can't wait to talk about drugs and sex than the WORD of GOD.
Posted By: Razoredge @ 02/04/2008 5:14:51 PM

Comment: Like others have mentioned I appreciate your honesty relating the difficultly explaining God to you daughter. It reminded me how I could not really explain to another who and what my father is like unless I knew him first. God wants us to know him. He speaks to us from His word the Bible, and hear us by our prayers. Its a good conversation that will lead to much closer relationship with Him and I suspect a more confortable talk with your daughter in the future.
Posted By: mamasboy @ 02/04/2008 4:15:33 PM

Comment: "Imagine, instead, that you told her something sensible. Something like, ???we don???t actually have souls.?"

Good example of not thinking critically! Blithely dismissing thousands of years of human experience and thought regarding the issue.
Posted By: AshleyKeen @ 02/04/2008 3:42:50 PM

Comment: My parents raised me very Southern Baptist. Fellow Southern Baptists? Billy Graham, Bill Clinton, George W. Bush, and... oh yeah... Britney Spears.

I don't think that the fact that my parents taught me about the bible from a young age caused me not to be a critical thinker. I think my parents did a really great job giving me a rounded view of religion, I would not have wanted them to withold spirituality from me until I was "ready" to deal with it. In the bible, Jesus talks about having childlike faith... no one understands what that means as well as a child. :)

I think that as long as you instill the importance of love and respect and truth in your kids, you really can't go wrong.
Posted By: dutchbu @ 02/04/2008 3:06:18 PM

Comment: Imagine, instead, that you told her something sensible. Something like, ???we don???t actually have souls.???
Why do you, and countless other parents have difficulty answering the religious questions posed by your children? It is simply because even you have difficulty believing the very premise of the child???s question. I can???t help but notice that you, like most people these days, hardly believe in your own religion. Unlike most, you actually admit it. I???m guessing its because you are somewhat intelligent, and therefore must reject the majority of supernatural fables found in your faith.
Yet, you are perfectly willing to teach the same nonsense to your young child. So, I ask: why pick and choose between different supernatural explanations for our history? Or, even worse, why try to tackle the silly task of explaining the physics of god? All the effort you are putting in to answering these religious questions are getting you nowhere, because that is where they lead. Instead you can simply tell your child the truth. There is no Santa, no Jesus, and no special heaven for you to burp your magic soul up to. You should start ???googling??? some scientific texts that can actually help you and your child understand our world.
Finally, no child is too young to think critically! You should not wait until ???someday??? to teach critical thought and skepticism. I think the problem is that you need to learn it for yourself first.
Posted By: mamasboy @ 02/04/2008 1:18:50 PM

Comment: Kathleen,

You seem to have a great relationship with your daughter. But if you're going to teach her to think "critically, not doctrinally" then you're going to need to examine the Church's doctrines much more fully than you have.

For one, the Church does not teach that "evolution is a fraud". The Church has taught (see Pope John Paul II) that the theory of evolution is not completely at odds with the history of creation as believed in by Christians.

Also, the suggestion that to think "critically" is in some way in oppostion to the establishment of doctrine and to the adherence to doctrine, is truly setting up a false dichotomy. Church doctrine is the very fruition of much critical thinking, especially regarding issues such as birth control, stem cell research, and abortion.

If you are open-minded enough to find out why the Church teaches what she does on these and other issues, I am certain you will discover that there has been much more critical thought given to these matters, resulting in formal Church doctine, than you will be able to find from sources who oppose the Church's teaching.

Beautiful relationship you have developed with your little girl! Thanks for your warm and honest article.
Ken G
Posted By: Ash_Rabin @ 02/04/2008 1:39:29 AM

Comment: As far as I know, we're free to believe in evolution if we want. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/19956961/
I happen to find dinosaurs pretty cool.
Posted By: Grulg @ 02/03/2008 4:04:24 PM

Comment: Well thought out article. I think this is something we all go thru, as parents or just growing up.

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