But by the 1970s, such actions seemed positively restrained compared with the behavior of the elite families of the Arabian Peninsula. In 1976, while America was reeling from Watergate and Vietnam and double-digit inflation and punk rock assailed Britain, King Khalid of Saudi Arabia was speccing a new aircraft: a 747, with tapestries and tables inlaid with mother-of-pearl. (He was clearly just laying the groundwork for Saudi Prince Alwaleed bin Talal, who last November purchased an Airbus A380 to customize for his own personal use.) It is perhaps one of the greatest tragedies of our age that those designing King Khalid's 747 were unable to realize plans for that sine qua non of petrodollar chic: a microwave oven capable of cooking an entire sheep.

However, there was the compensation of an airborne operating theater. In fact, I advise all of today's self-respecting oil billionaires to insist that this vital safety feature be included on all their planes, boats and larger motor vehicles. After all, a mobile operating theater might be just the thing you need after one too many Tsar's Breakfasts.

© 2008