Modern Outcasts
In your editorial you suggest that the strategy of "love the smoker, hate the smoke" might help smokers quit while avoiding stigmatization.
It's directed not only at smokers but at their family, their loved ones, their friends. As the number of smokers declines, though it's still a large number, many people don't know many smokers. So when they see a smoker they tend to make a judgment—especially doctors, pharmacists, dentists, who have very low smoking rates. My message in this medical journal is, Don't be dismissive. Have compassion for the smoker, even if you want to have that smoker quit.
The pariah effect extends to many parts of life, right?
When you go on these dating services, apparently one of the big things is no smokers. And college roommates—many dorms are smoke free, but there's a check: "Do you smoke?" One of the worst things for a nonsmoker is to be roomed with a smoker. It's intrusive in our daily lives now. Some landlords won't rent to smokers … If you're not able to quit smoking, you run the risk of having a constricted social and professional life … When you go to restaurants you may not be able to smoke, or you may sit at a designated table. It's a daily reminder that you're different, and that you have a habit that most people don't respect.
You mention that many smokers have substance abuse issues or mental health problems. How does feeling like an outcast affect them?
In my parents' era smoking was what everybody did. And now, in many parts of the country, it's a behavior that's shunned. Though smoking used to be equally distributed among all classes, now it's disproportionately a habit among people with lower class, lower education, less income and people with mental illness and/or problems with substance abuse, like alcohol and illegal drugs. For those people, then, it's a double stigma. It's already a stigma having to cope with chronic mental illness and/or drug use. Smoking is a detectable habit. People can see you smoking, and also they can smell it.
I feel very compassionate. I don't want people to make the association, when they see someone smoking, "bad person" and think that person must really want to be smoking. What you do want them to think is, "This person must find it extremely hard to quit. They know how bad it is for them and for others." One of the reasons that smoking has become such a socially unacceptable habit is there's definitive evidence, though it's contested by the tobacco industry, that secondhand smoke is harmful and causes, according to the CDC [Centers for Disease Control], about 50,000 of the 435,000 annual deaths from smoking in the United States alone.
Is nicotine the most difficult substance to quit?
People who have been successfully able to quit alcohol, heroin and cocaine—many of them can't quit smoking. They're ex-addicts, they're ex-alcoholics, but they're smokers. Which is, again, why you should have real compassion.
Why are smokers much more likely to quit if their spouses quit?
It's really hard for you to quit if the person you're living with is smoking. It's just a constant reminder of what you've lost.
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Member Comments
Posted By: BrotherLiberty @ 05/24/2008 9:37:35 AM
Comment: The-shelton
You have made my point. Almost everything can be banned with the excuse that "It will cause my insurance to go up." We will loose many freedoms under this mentality. This is especially true if a National Health Care is put into place.
For example, ice cream can and fast food can be heavily regulated under the excuse that they cause obesity, heart disease, and diabetes. Motorcycles can be banned because if you have a wreck on one the injuries are usually substantial. Overly load music can be banned because it causes hearing damage; which to treat will cause premiums to go up. And the list goes on...
Freedom is so important and valuable, a price cannot be put on it. The true cost of freedom is BLOOD. This is how it was purchased. Brave men fought and died for our freedoms, and we dishonor them by stripping the very thing that they suffered horrendously for while in battle, and some gave their lives for.
In today's society, their are many who want to follow a fascist path of banning anything they do not agree with or annoys them. Their are many things that I do not agree with and find disturbing; but because I love freedom, I fight for others rights to live as they choose.
Posted By: FifiLaRoux13 @ 05/23/2008 6:31:19 PM
Comment: The way I quit was by keeping it a secret from anybody who didn't need to know and asking those who knew not to say anything. That stopped all the annoying questions that only served to remind me that I was not smoking a cigarette. I also used a nicotine patch, but kept firmly in mind the sight of my friend getting sick, smoking a cigarette while wearing a patch. Then I just lived my life and gave myself a little leeway in my life. I celebrate 1 year smoke free tomorrow, with rarely a desire to smoke under stress. But I have alternate plans for those times.
Posted By: the_shelton @ 05/23/2008 3:53:36 PM
Comment: Whether you try to defend it or not, or whether you believe that it hurts you or not, the facts of the case are in. If you really want to stop, I'll tell you one way that works...
Don't go around trying to tell yourself you are quitting, instead, say I am a non smoker.
Throw away everything that looks like or is attached to a cigarette.
Clean all of your clothes and house and cars so they don't smell like smoke.
Change your habits so that you don't go to the same places that you used to, such as
Starbucks and a smoke, the bar and a smoke or taking break at work to get a smoke.
Set up a whole new life, because I'll tell you right now that is how addicted you are. You have to change almost everything in your life. Start taking your lunch and eating inside where you can't smoke. Everytime you think about it, get up and do something entirely different from what you usually do, like don't go chewing gum (that's trying to quit), instead go into the rest room and do some jumping jacks. After you eat, get some crackers and continue to eat them, preferably low fat so you turn into a tub of lard. Don't go to the bars and drink, if you must drink (another equally disgusting habit), buy a bottle or can and go somewhere where you can't smoke to have it.
Try to change everything that reminds you of smoking. Get healthy and stay off of them.
The body only needs about four to five days to kick it, but you and your mind need a hell of a lot longer, so you are going to be in it for the long haul, so set up a good system to get you through.
Annnnddddddd...... Tell everyone you know that you are not a smoker anymore, and ask them to help you enforce it. They will be more than happy to help you, believe me.