I was FLOORED by how much my best friend changed personality-wise on her wedding day. Had I known she was going to turn into such a monster I would have never agreed to be the maid of honor or even a bridesmaid for that matter. I showed up at the wedding wearing exactly what was requested of me and looking mighty nice I might add. Instead of complimenting my apprearence, she instead proceeded to point out everything that was wrong with my attire. She asked me to remove all my none-ear piercings, which sounds reasonable, but you have to understand that this is coming from a woman who has about 15 tattoos and her nipples pierced. Her husband was in a metal band and all his groomsmen had visible tattoos and facial piercings and they were not asked to take them out. I was pissed to say the least, especially since she knows me and has always been accepting my body jewelery before. She also requested that I cut off my hemp ankle bracelet (which could only be cut off). The bracelet was a gift from HER and I had worn it around my ankle for the past 3 years, the fact that she asked me to destroy a gift from her that I treasured on the day of her wedding just because it didn't exactly match my dress almost made me cry. Also at her reception she yelled at me for wearing a hoodie over my dress because it was FREEZING in the reception hall. I was so excited for her wedding, but to show up and be attacked for not being "perfect" just ruined the day for me. I couldn't believe after about 10 years of friendship that she would be so nasty towards me. Just goes to show that some people view the wedding as a way of "showing off" rather than a special union of love. Needless to say that experience did not help with my cynicism towards marriage.
Extreme Wedding Planning
From bridesmaid pre-nups, to custom-made dog tuxes, for some couples, ordinary nuptials just won't do.
Member Comments
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Posted By: Tacocat27 @ 08/13/2008 11:42:36 AM
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Posted By: JCrippen @ 06/10/2008 11:21:18 PM
PS Excuse the typos on the message below... I had a dinner engagement LOL
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Posted By: JCrippen @ 06/10/2008 9:18:52 PM
I'm not sure if I'd enjoy weddings of quite such severity, but I'm a photographer on the Caliifonia Central Coast and I love the creativeness of some familes. I've shot them in everwhere from military bases to
ships cruising the bay. The most important thing I could tell any couple is relax... you're gonna have fun!
Expect thing to go wrong. Every single wedding has it's mishaps, it's just part of the fond memories and future laughter for years to come :) John Crippen -
Posted By: jh8675309 @ 06/10/2008 3:57:26 PM
My husband and I were married in April. My parents spent a total of about $8,000.00. This was for my cotoure gown, which was originally $2,500.00 and I got it for $300.00, photographer, cake, dinner for 125 people, and a beautiful reception at a historic mansion. If we can pull if off for $8,000.00 then anyone can. I watch the bridal shows and see what people spend just on flowers and it AMAZES me. When did we lose the sense of how special the day is supposed to be? My husband and I shared our vows with each other. He wrote his and I sang mine. I cant tell you how many people said that they were touched by our vows and ceremony. It just goes to show you that a $50,000.00 pair of shoes are not what makes the impression on other people.
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Posted By: acp2483 @ 06/10/2008 3:21:33 PM
Screw that! I am saying NO to being a bridesmaid for anyone. This is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. They're taking all the fun out of a favorite past time of being a bridesmaid. What happened to having fun with a wedding???? It's so sad it has become so industrial anymore. If someone asks me to be a bridesmaid and shoves a pre nup in my face, then they are sadly mistaken. My personal time and my money are far worth more than a stupid sheet of paper. This is what the world has sickingly become.
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Posted By: CraigC762 @ 06/10/2008 1:36:24 PM
The "Double Dressing" thing is not a new concept. Chinese people have been doing it for years. Typically, the bride will wear a traditional western white bridal gown for the ceremony, then change to a chinese dress called a cheongsam for the reception dinner.
I'm thankful that my GF is seeing how complicated my brother's wedding is, even though it is simple on the grand scale of things. She's thinking we should elope, which would save us a bundle. -
Posted By: Mrs. LZ @ 06/10/2008 11:47:11 AM
I am 24 and have been married for 3 years. We are attending 6 weddings this year, since everyone our age is getting hitched and I have yet to see any of them do any one of these rediculous things. It may be a trend, but I feel like the article is overestimating the number of people that would do this or can afford it. Example: I have never heard of any of my friends (aka brides) even think about having more than one wedding dress. So I doubt it happens "more often than not".
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Posted By: cam2009 @ 06/10/2008 11:02:21 AM
I'm getting married to the love of my life in April 2009 - we are simple people who wanted a semi-simple wedding... all in total we are getting exactly what we want in our ceremony and reception for less than $10,000 - it took a lot of working together and that in and of it self is a relationship-strengthening tool. By doing the work ourselves we are helping keep costs down significantly, ensuring we get what we want and get to enjoy learning even more about eachother, how to problem solve together and spend some good old-fashioned quality time together.
We make it a weekly activity to accomplish SOMETHING for our wedding - we are hand making our centerpieces together, wrote our entire ceremony (not just the vows), we've included only ourselves in the planning so even though it will be simple it will be all about us and the celebration of the joining of our families - right down to getting married the day after his parents 32nd anniversary and the day before my parents 27th! -
Posted By: tapskram @ 06/10/2008 10:51:42 AM
I say "Vegas baby!" - the heck with impressing the family and friends.....have an "Elvis" wedding and play the slots!
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Posted By: shakespeare824@hotmail.com @ 06/10/2008 9:20:32 AM
Why not spend the money on the down payment for a home, or pay off your home longer? My wedding was for about 100 people, and yet it was on the small scale. I sew, so I made my own custom wedding dress, and my maid of honor made the two bridesmaids' dresses. My wedding wasn't lavish, but it was perfect (except for the pianist, who was awful). But I just celebrated 15 years, and I am happier with my husband than I was even then...it isn't the wedding, it's the marriage that is important. The wedding is just a show. A marriage should NEVER be.
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Posted By: maryannmin @ 06/10/2008 1:38:18 PM
I couldn't agree more...it seems that our priorities have been somewhat displaced...isn't it time that we put things back into perspective?....lets start our marriages out the right way...building a "Life time" NOT a "Show time"!!!
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Posted By: mamalion @ 06/10/2008 1:18:53 PM
My husband and I knew we were going to be together, so we up and eloped one weekend. Turns out the weekend that we eloped, that Monday was a new federal holiday, so the courthouse was closed in Florida. We had our own ceremony in one of our favorite places in Key West and came back to home to get legally hitched in front of the JP a few days later. It actually worked out great because although my dad didn't walk me down the aisle, he was there for the courthouse ceremony, so he felt like he was part of it. Turns out I am the fourth generation on my mom's side that eloped. Been happily married almost twelve years with a beautiful daughter. My husband used to ask me if I was disappointed in not having traditional ceremony. Heck no! I hate to plan, hate stress and getting married meant spending my life with my best friend, not buying some overpriced gown and putting on a show. Mom and dad gave us a great gift - a nice down payment on a house. Some girls need to be the princess for the day, but they also need to remember what marriage is really all about anyway. My husband and I still laugh when we tell the story. $65.00 for the marriage license and JP and two last minute airfare tickets to Key West.
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Posted By: Bucinka @ 06/10/2008 9:15:05 AM
Brides who are more concerned with how the wedding will look than the marriage need to get their priorities straight. If a bride cares enough about a bridesmaid as a friend (or sister) to invite her to be in the party, she shouldn't care what that girl weighs. I've also heard of brides who insisted that all the bridesmaids get the same updo. Lady, these aren't dolls that you get to pose any way you want; they're people.
My theory is that many unhappy marriages stay together because of the extravagant waste of money that went into the wedding. These people have it all backwards.-
Posted By: acp2483 @ 06/10/2008 3:24:44 PM
And yet these are the same women who procreate 2 years later with a baby in one hand and a divorce paper in the other.
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Posted By: pworrell4@yahoo.com @ 06/10/2008 6:49:30 AM
A few years ago, we were invited to two weddings in one weekend. #1 was about the ceremony, well chosen scripture, vows that brought us to tears and even a specially written song for the bride sung by the groom. The reception was simple but was full of love and friendship. #2 was a 6 1/2 minute ceremony-yes we did time it-one guest missed it by needing a restroom break!!!The reception was elaborate, pretentious and liquor filled. We still talk about #1, and you guessed it #2 is history. Divorced within 1 year.
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Posted By: ravitchn@bellsouth.net @ 06/07/2008 8:11:43 AM
Since half of all weddings end in divorce thee must be a serious reason for extravagant weddings. It is I think a psychological compensation for the unhappiness that will finally end the marriage or at least make it less than idyllic. Marriage is a social arrangement for the raising of children and the consolidation of property -- nothing else. Elaborate weddings are attempts to pretend otherwise.
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Posted By: omachuca @ 06/10/2008 5:44:26 PM
Ugh, your comment about the meaning of marriage is correct, but falls awfully short. My unmarried, shacked up cousins' relationships are less respected in than those cousins that do get married. Its all about the symbolism for me!
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Posted By: reisbergsgal @ 06/06/2008 2:50:16 PM
I was just married and it seems like we've lost touch with what marriage means; marriage is not about a dress (or two dresses), or an ice bar, or bridesmaids! Marriage is about the commitment that you and your partner are agreeing to for the rest of your life-- with something like that on your plate, how can you even think about dresses and dances? The women who choose things like the ones mentioned in this article don't want to be married- they want to be brides. My entire wedding (for 100 people) was $9,000- I have a friend who is getting married this month and her wedding will cost $70,000 (for 100 people). Instead of taking the time to really focus on the fact that she and her soon-to-be husband are going to be partners for life, she is too busy worrying about her $9,000 dress, her bridesmaids makeup, colors, and linens, etc. She has forgotten the fact that she and her fiance have some major hurtles that they need to get over before marriage, and that marriage is not a quick fix to these problems.
Someone once told me that "the larger the wedding, the shorter the marriage." I'm starting to agree... -
Posted By: ghost75 @ 06/05/2008 3:45:13 PM
#5-- the math must not be THAT easy to do... $100 x 200 guests = $20,000.
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Posted By: Fred Smithers @ 06/05/2008 3:38:41 PM
Another tribute article to hoplessly insecure and depressingly stupid Americans. No wonder the rest of the world hates us. We are morons.
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Posted By: notroubleatall1963 @ 06/05/2008 10:36:45 PM
I'd say hopelessly well-to-do with lots of time on their hands, and a concern chiefly for entertainment, self-aggrandisement and lavish displays of drunken abandon!
Sounds like fun - but not in excess!
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Posted By: Fred Smithers @ 06/05/2008 3:36:57 PM
Another tribute article to the lifestyles of hopelessly insecure and depressingly stupid Americans. No wonder the rest of the world hates us. We are morons.
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Posted By: Matches_Malone @ 06/05/2008 3:38:24 PM
Fred Smithers is a moron. F*ck you Fred Smithers.
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Posted By: linlea @ 06/05/2008 2:13:54 PM
A bridesmaid pre-nup??? Have people really lost such sight of what a wedding is? How sad that people will subject their friends and loved ones to such scrutiny. Why not enjoy what the day really means - a marriage between two people and not a one day spectacle.
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Posted By: liladaddy @ 06/05/2008 12:58:32 PM
Item 5. "the math is easy to do" - 200 guests times $100 is $20,000 not $200,000.
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