Having Kids Makes You Happy

all of you that have kids good for you.. things are different now, kids are more of a hassle then a necessity. Marriage is also a thing of the past. Marriage has NO gains for men, only advantages are for the woman. Get rid of all these good for nothing stay at home moms that watch opera all day eating bon bons. all you women with your muffin tops are nothing but depreciating assets.

"My problem is not with people who choose not to have kids. My problem is with the author's conclusion.
The author has no authority to make a "judgement" on the question "Having children makes you happier". At the end of article, she says "FALSE". That is what I have a problem with. Leave it as an article and let each one of us take what we want from the article. But, don't pass a judgement on it.
Even if the author had said "False, IN MY OPINION", I would have accepted the article. But, she just passes a judgement "False" on behalf of everone !!!!!"

Yep, completely agree with you. She is not warranted to make that particular conclusion in any sense. Unless extensive scientific research were conducted regarding serotonin levels in the brains of those who had children and those who did not with a control group, etc...that would not even really conclude anything because of the various extraneous other factors that can contribute to unhappiness. What if those who have children have a base of unhappiness and are searching for a way to fill the void, and their level of unhappiness has nothing to do with the presence or absence of children?( Just offering that as an alternative, doesn't mean I think so)..But I honestly believe that children are from above, that every single life has a purpose and a meaning. Who are we to sit around and wonder if those who create life, i.e. mothers and fathers, are selfish, happy, materialistic, whatever? Parents are in the best position because they get to host a new life until that life can function independently. I think we're all selfish to even ponder whether or not it's a good thing to have kids. Life is just too precious.

I'm young(28) and I have four kids I'm also married and though I feel everybody has their own calling in life and own happiness, I look forward to each and everyday i get to hug and kiss my babies. I love every smile, every mess they make trying to discover the world and every question.I look forward to having more with my husband (two more when my 4 turn teenagers) Most people think I'm crazy and I think that we are defnitely having a society moving away from having children.

I'm young(28) and I have four kids I'm also married and though I feel everybody has their own calling in life and own happiness, I look forward to each and everyday i get to hug and kiss my babies. I love every smile, every mess they make trying to discover the world and every question.I look forward to having more with my husband (two more when my 4 turn teenagers) Most people think I'm crazy and I think that we are defnitely having a society moving away from having children.

Having children is what you make of it... If you choose to look at it with a hatred then yes, life is going to be hard and unpleasant may I say. But you can also choose to look at it as a blessing and not a curse and choose to accept the problems that come and have a great life....I know that children are hard and sometimes are unpleasant and they can also bring problems some problems are little harder to deal with than others. Children also can make you sad or even disappointed. But it is during those problems that you impart your wisdom and knowldege. You teach them and you learn a little bit more about your self too! People who ask don't you hate having children "NO" I always say. I love them- their problems and all... About spending time with your spouse- you make the time!!! Order a pizza or have ice cream. Cuddle in front of the fire, or talk to each other on the couch.... You make the time for the things that are important. Yes you are tired and want to go to bed but then the moments alone are great and you don't care that you are a little more tired the next morning...Being a family is team work and takes time to get used to. But I think that it truly is all worth it. I have friends who don't plan on children and that is there choice. I don't hate them or blame them. You have to do what the Lord puts on your heart. Some people have kids and some don't. It doesn' truly matter anyway. What matters is that if you are a parent and hate being one- look at things differently. Try to change the way you think and things will change. To the moms: We make the atmospere of the home! We can change the mood of a problem with one encouraging word, with one laugh, with one hug. We just have to see things as good and not bad. I know it is easier said than done, but when you do, it really does make all the change in the world of your family!!! Blessings to all!!!

Did the study separate the difference between people who plan to have children and people who unexpectedly have children? Because, I feel that will have a great impact on how happy they are with having children.

i LIKED THE ARTICULE. i AM A 28 YEARS OLD WOMEN, AND NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT HAVING MY OWN CHILD.
I AGREE THAT CHILDREN ARE GOOD FOR SOME COUPLES AND BAD FOR OTHERS.
AND THEY MAKE YOU LOOSE FOCUS ON OTHER IMPORTANT THINKS .
I BELIEVE THAT IF YOU CHOOSE TO HAVE CHILDREN YOU SHOULD SPEND TIME WITH THEM AS MUCH AS YOU CAN, AND NOT JUST NEGLECT THEM.

mnarich, you are confused if you think children are "about LOVE and love will improve the world." With our global population busting at the seem, more children will not solve (or ???improve???) any of the problems that currently face humanity. But more significant to this conversation than ???improving the world?????? who are you to tell others how to define love in their own little world. Who are you to analyze why I don't want children. Frankly, I find the "procreation pushers" more offensive than any other segment of society. Have your children. Love your children. I have no problem with that. Stop trying to dissect and psychoanalyze me for not wanting children.

I guess having children and life with them is what you make of it...Yes you can complain and say oh my life i horrible because I have kids or you can say, yes- I have children and they are not easy to deal with infact they are hard to deal with. But I choose to look at them as a blessing. Because in fact that is what they are... We all make the choice to hate being a parent or loving it. Yes there are some problems and some are bigger than others, but, when you look at the big picture, would you really trade it... Would you take it all back and say I hate kids! I know I would not. know that my kids are going to frustrate me and I know that they are going to make me mad or even disappointed. But I look at as a growing experience for both of us... Every lesson I teach my children I learn a little bit more about myself... There is also great ways to spend time with your spouse even when you have children....Take a look around after the kids are in bed- order a pizza or buy ice cream. Make the time to spend with eachother in stead of complaining about it!!!! Parenthood and marriage is what you make it. You can choose to complain or you can make the best of it and see things as blessings. I know I do...

I guess having children and life with them is what you make of it...Yes you can complain and say oh my life i horrible because I have kids or you can say, yes- I have children and they are not easy to deal with infact they are hard to deal with. But I choose to look at them as a blessing. Because in fact that is what they are... We all make the choice to hate being a parent or loving it. Yes there are some problems and some are bigger than others, but, when you look at the big picture, would you really trade it... Would you take it all back and say I hate kids! I know I would not. know that my kids are going to frustrate me and I know that they are going to make me mad or even disappointed. But I look at as a growing experience for both of us... Every lesson I teach my children I learn a little bit more about myself... There is also great ways to spend time with your spouse even when you have children....Take a look around after the kids are in bed- order a pizza or buy ice cream. Make the time to spend with eachother in stead of complaining about it!!!! Parenthood and marriage is what you make it. You can choose to complain or you can make the best of it and see things as blessings. I know I do...

Here's the deal people, if YOU are happy, then YOU'LL be happy. Sound too simple? It's really not. People make it that way by worrying what others and the whole of society think about thier actions. Shrug that off your back, do what you want to do, and see how happy you are then. Kids don't neccesarily make you happy. How many people know a couple that was just about to break up, but then got pregnant? Did they think that was a cure all? Did they go about being just as bitter to one another anyway? Some people having a child actually helps them grow up. Some parents can be good parents emotionwise, but still think of themselves when it comes to spending money on themselves. Some parents "stay together for the kids" and end up devorcing when thier child is older (which makes it sting not less by the way). The point is children should NOT be braught into an unloving home. And telling people "But you HAVE to!" is just dumb. Some people just shouldn't have children. Some people would make wonderful, loving, attentive parents, but they choose not to. Either way, live your life the way you want to and you'll be (*gasp*) happy. If you want to live your life free of parental responsibility fine. If you want to have them, fine. One side shouldn't condemn them other in this case. We're talking about child bearing, not murder.

Here's the deal people, if YOU are happy, then YOU'LL be happy. Sound too simple? It's really not. People make it that way by worrying what others and the whole of society think about thier actions. Shrug that off your back, do what you want to do, and see how happy you are then. Kids don't neccesarily make you happy. How many people know a couple that was just about to break up, but then got pregnant? Did they think that was a cure all? Did they go about being just as bitter to one another anyway? Some people having a child actually helps them grow up. Some parents can be good parents emotionwise, but still think of themselves when it comes to spending money on themselves. Some parents "stay together for the kids" and end up devorcing when thier child is older (which makes it sting not less by the way). The point is children should NOT be braught into an unloving home. And telling people "But you HAVE to!" is just dumb. Some people just shouldn't have children. Some people would make wonderful, loving, attentive parents, but they choose not to. Either way, live your life the way you want to and you'll be (*gasp*) happy. If you want to live your life free of parental responsibility fine. If you want to have them, fine. One side shouldn't condemn them other in this case. We're talking about child bearing, not murder.

First - the article is a crock, where's the control group? The group of identical people where in one situation they had a kid, and in another situation they had no kids! You cannot generalize people as "all are the same", and the ones with kids are unhappier - it's absolutely absurd.

Second - It is quite obvious to me that reproduction is a product of evolution, and that all feelings we have toward the opposite sex are for reproductive purposes, and as a result - the human species survives. And that the feeling a mother has toward her baby after giving birth, or breast feeding, is so that she can tell her daughters about what an unbelievable feeling it is. This makes her daughters want to have babies, and human beings survive for another generation. Same thing goes for the unbelievable feelings we have when going through the process of procreating - the reason it feels so good is not just that, it is so you will do it more, and the human race survives.

Anyhow, it can be argued that humans have evolved past the point of following anamalistic urges, but I don't see many people not having sex due to it. Just making the decision to not deal with the natural consequences.

Also, there must be a bigger reason why we're here than to ensure our happiness (be it with or without child). Why does the universe even exist? If its a higher power that put us here, then this being also made us have the urge to have kids!

Just some thought on the issue
Gotta go back to work. - everyone is different - please don't judge either way.

People that choose not to have children will never understand the immense joy and satisfaction that comes from the roller coaster of parenthood. Unless one actually becomes a parent, these experiences will remain a mystery. It is like describing the taste of chocolate to someone who has never experienced eating a piece. We came to this life without a guarantee of happiness. We choose how we are going to react to the many complexities of life. Having children is not a guarantee that we will be happy. How ridiculous to assume that this is the case. The difference between this generation and previous generations is that we think we deserve anything we want, have no idea what sacrifice is and have no concept of delayed gratification. Being a parent entails loving someone above ones self. I believe this is much more difficult to do these days because people are more selfish. Humanity would come to a quick end if everyone decided that it is better not to have children. I would never trade my ???unhappiness??? of changing diapers, cleaning up vomit, reading stories, holding a sick child, giving birth, teaching, playing 4 square, changing mud clothes, feeding, settling arguments, teacher???s conferences, crying over a pet that died, singing, watching movies, and shots for ANYTHING! I guess ignorance is bliss but one never can taste the sweet without the bitter.

Why DO people have children?
To have someone take care of them when their old?
To bring a sense of meaning to their lives?
To please their God?
To bring themselves closer to their spouses?
To continue their lineage?
To experience a love like no other?

Guess what - these are all SELFISH reasons.

I'm sick and tired of those who say that choosing not to have children is selfish.