Having Kids Makes You Happy

I don't think that having kids makes you less happy. It it all comes down to how you view your life. Negativity has a way of worming its way into everyones life no matter who you are and what your "child" status is. Life is a constant struggle to be "happy" in whatever way each individual views that term. I can't say that I'm ecstatic about losing my childless nights on the town, or being able to go to the rest room by my self or any number of things that can be done easier without a child. But I would'nt give it up for the world, and after being reintroduced to the "night on the town" after four years of "child hell" I can honestly say that, that I surely do NOT miss. I'm glad to have my four year old son, and having him makes up for those times that I just can't do something by my self. You pick your battles and you are given the choice to be happy with what decisions you've made and what you've been given. And if most are not happy, then it's not because they do or do not have children, it's because they chose to not find the joy in what they have...

I don't think that having kids makes you less happy. It it all comes down to how you view your life. Negativity has a way of worming its way into everyones life no matter who you are and what your "child" status is. Life is a constant struggle to be "happy" in whatever way each individual views that term. I can't say that I'm ecstatic about losing my childless nights on the town, or being able to go to the rest room by my self or any number of things that can be done easier without a child. But I would'nt give it up for the world, and after being reintroduced to the "night on the town" after four years of "child hell" I can honestly say that, that I surely do NOT miss. I'm glad to have my four year old son, and having him makes up for those times that I just can't do something by my self. You pick your battles and you are given the choice to be happy with what decisions you've made and what you've been given. And if most are not happy, then it's not because they do or do not have children, it's because they chose to not find the joy in what they have...

i didn't want kids, untill i had a baby....now i couldn't imagine ever living without my baby boy. Is the secret to happiness having children ? Maybe, maybe not. All i know is something unmeasurable, undefinable, unbelievable happened to me the second i looked into my baby's eyes.

don't get me wrong, having kids takes work and sacrifice....but so does any job out there in the world. Tell me, what kind of hours and time a CEO puts in each week? If you want that high paying job, great car, clothes....what are you willing to put in and sacrifice to make it work?

kids, babies, children are work....but when they're yours...it never matters. or atleast it doesn't matter to me. i used to hate changing my sister's kids poopy diapers....but i don't mind changing my son's. I used to think babies were whiney, snively, ankle bitters....but then then i look at that smile...or see that first step, and i feel like i just got a brand new car...

to compare the happiness of the childless and those with child is like comparing apples to oranges.

happiness aside... there is also plenty of depression out there whether you're childless or have a boat load of kids.

I think this article is stupid overall....it brings out the bad against each of us. Instead of having a topic that asks " What makes you happy? ". And you shouldnt write an article about something you've never experienced. Its like me writting a book about how to build a computer when I'm in the culinary field.

i didn't want kids, untill i had a baby....now i couldn't imagine ever living without my baby boy. Is the secret to happiness having children ? Maybe, maybe not. All i know is something unmeasurable, undefinable, unbelievable happened to me the second i looked into my baby's eyes. Those who are childless will never understand, and are happy because they don't know what it's like. Don't get me wrong, having a baby takes work...a kind of work you'e never done before. But so does every other t

In response to "californiagirl"--I don't appreciate the generalization that all children are "screaming at me to buy them something." Childrens' actions are a direct result of their upbringing and not all of us raise little hellions. I think, just like with everything else in life, you get out of parenthood what you put into it.

It's not longer a fact of selfishness or not. Now we are talking about cultural expectations and how far people go to fit/blend in with a certain group, neighborhood, or even a society entirely. What feeds these expectations is clearly the media. I'm sorry, but even in the article mentioned how TV in itself present commercials of happy mothers/families living the perfect life because of kids. Quite frankly, if you want to really see the effects of having children, take a walk at the mall or the park and witness how families interact for yourself. Just sitting on a bench and looking at people will broaden your mind and open up to much more human interactions. Since childhood I've been as curious as the cat that died, and that small quality had me looking at people wherever I went and seeing how they interacted. Listening and learning. Until I was able to form my own opinions. Personally... I'd like kids of my own. Not because society tells me too; not because God expect us to only have sex for procreation and what ever else they preach; but because I love kids. They are an opportunity for you to share your wisdom and make them people better than yourself. See them grow and teach them to be people of good will, open-mindedness, and maybe who knows, they'll be the ones to get americans out of that rotten hole you are all in. That hole you all keep digging, deeper and deeper until it caves. Ignorance and arrogance hand in hand has never been as much as a mortal enemy as it is now. Heck, what do I know, I'm just a kid. I'm proud to say that being difference is worth it. At an early age being able to question and reach Platonic conclusions without ever reading a book, makes me pretty darn happy. I want my kids to be a portrayal of what they want to be, to be happy with who they are, and not what society wants them to be.

Simple- It depends on what makes you happy. Having my 3 children has been the hardest/best thing I've ever done in my life. I wouldn't trade it for anything. I know that I wouldn't be as happy or fulfilled if I didn't have my children. Remember the old roller coaster analagy in the movie "Parenthood"? Simplistic yes- but a good way to describe those ups and downs you go thru with your children- and how it's SO worth it. Because of having children I have an amazing extended family who love each other. What a support this is to me in my life. This is what true happiness is to me. I realize that this has been my experience of life and that perhaps others don't share my vision. That's ok. Maybe their true happiness is found in something else.

I am 32 and I have one child. At time yes I am happy but also suffering with post partum depression almost a year after giving birth it has affected my entire life more than I thought. Some days I wish I didnt have her. Maybe I wont feel this way when she is older. For people that are opting out of having kids I say whatever brings you happiness and fulfillment is better than having regrets down the road.

I'm 51 years old and never had children. I've always been happy and never wanted children either. About 4 years ago, I had to change jobs and now I am teaching high school mathematics. Now that I've been around so many children, I'm really glad I never had any of my own. I certainly don't want them now. Parenthood is not for everyone. It's definitely not for me.

I am offended by the notion that there is "something wrong" with those of us who are childless by choice. Many of my dearest friends and, thankfully, my parents, are supportive of the fact that my husband and I do not want children. However, people frequently make insensitive comments that we don't understand spending time with "family" since we are childless. My husband and I are a family, with or without kids. I enjoy my brother's children for limited amounts of time, but he continues to expect that the aunts, uncles, and grandparents are built-in babysitters. We're the bad guys for refusing to sit (excluding emergency situations). I always thought that deciding to have kids was a very serious choice, but some people don't see it that way. It bothers me that there is such a stigma against not having kids, but no stigma against the "communal" view of child-rearing. When i was a kid, my parents paid for babysitters. They went to dinner at restaurants with other adults and we stayed home. This is rare today- it is the norm to be surrounded by small children in nice restaurants, at the theater, even at bar/grills at 10 p.m.! We had to stop going "out" with my brother and his wife because every outing was a break for them from watching their own kids. Kudos to those who think long and hard about having kids before doing it- or, GASP, choosing not to. Kudos to this author for validating the fact that happinness comes from within, rather than by following some prescribed norm.

Everyone around me always asks when my husband and I are going to have kids...and my response, I am not ready, I am too selfish to have kids. Yes that' sright, i said it, I am SELFISH! I enjoy sleeping in on Saturday and Sunday and just getting a full 8+ hours of sleep on the weekdays too much. I enjoy being able to shop for myself and/or my husband and not have to worry about someone screaming at me to buy them something . Yes, at this point in my life, it is all about me and you all shoud be thankful that I am not bringing another child into this world while I am too busy being selfish. And that is my opinion and my belief. And to the person that thinks sex is just to procreate, that's a negative there buddy, it was also for pleasure and to connect with someone on a closer level than anyone else, read your bible, God created sex for both reasons. Anyway, at least I am with my husband and we married to be partners and friends because we enjoy each other and if right now all we enjoy is ourselves than so be it. If God happens to bless us with a child, then we know it was meant to be that we become parents. And that is how I see it. Just tring to let you all in that don't understand how some of us live without kids, this is why.

It's amazing how most people think there's something wrong with you because you don't have children. My husband and I decided to not become parents because of our ages when we married (40's and 50's), and secondly , because of health issues. I still can't believe the comments that I receive from near perfect strangers, suggesting that I should sacrifice my (remaining) health to have children and how selfish we are! I can certainly conclude from these types of statements that certain people should not have any children at all!!! I believe that parents' obligation to their children is to give them the best head start in life that they can possibly can. As the poet K. Gibran wrote: "Your children are not your children; they are the sons and duaghters of life's longing for itself" We did not have to have children to feel fulfilled in our lives.

I have only one child and I can honestly say that I have experienced joys I never thought possible spending time with her. No matter how cliche that may sound, it is the truth. Parenthood is not easy; no one ever said it would be. But it has also been one of the most wonderful experiences of my entire life, and continues to be. I look forward to spending time with my child all day while I'm at work and spending that time with her is the best part of my day. I do not think, however, that everyone should have kids; just because my experience with parenthood has been positive does not mean it will be the same for everyone. Some people just aren't meant to be parents. But I did want to express the opinion that for some people, parenthood truly is a joy and not a duty or a burden.

This is a follow up to a posting that I made earlier after reading "love4animals" note. I would like to say that I generally agree with her. There used to be a movement called "Zero Population Growth" that is a movement that needs to re-visited. Global warming; dimishing resources....so much of this could also be helped by pointing out that in this age...it is Quality (small families taken care of by people who want them...not pushed by a religious ideolgy or political adgenda) not Quanitity - perhaps people need to take tests to make sure that they are intelligent and caring enough along with being financially able to take care of children before they are allowed to have or even keep them. Yes this is an extreme view, but one that will perhaps get people thinking...after all Western thought is about the individual's value and now there looks to be smaller and smaller value when you look in the future and see what this world will be like if un-checked poplulation growth continues. ERS in Indiana

Childless and intend to stay that way...LOVING IT !!!!!