Subsidized in the City

Amen. I am 25, financial independent, living in San Francisco and doing it all on my own. The day I voluntarily handed over my dad's credit card was one of the proudest days of my life. Cheers to controlling your own destiny.

Amen. I was blessed like Melody to have a college education funded by my parents, but the day I graduated I voluntarily handed over my dad's credit card and have been supporting myself ever since. I live in San Francisco and it is an expensive life, but knowing that I am in control of my own destiny is so refreshing. My Dad always paid for things growing up --but I would always stress over money. Cheers to being single, 25 and financial independent

Great Article! Nice to hear people are toughing it out and learning those life skills of independence. Keep it up you'll be better for it.

I live on my own. Im 22 and go to a school out in PA. Its tough, i pay my rent, car payment, utilities, cell phone, gas , food, books, TUITION !!!!!! Its a tough life. But my friends give me respect for it because they see how hard I have it and that I bust my ass to make it work. I have friends and roommates that mommy and daddy pay the tab for everything. Sometimes I am jealous of them and sometimes I get pissed off at them for it. But in the long run its showing me that I can make it work on my own.

I am older than most of the people posting but I have an ex-boyfriend who is currently supporting his 37 year old son and his 2 children. This "kid" hasn't worked a steady job since he was 19 and still depends on dad and grandma for every aspect of his being. I raised my daughter to take care of herself financially and to be independent of me, not dependent upon me. I still help her out every now and again but whatever happened to raising children to provide for a life of their own? Sad, mom and dad think they are doing everyone a favor but when that same kid is still being supported by mom and dad at 40, it isn't that funny anymore. Pathetic, comes to mind.

Amen. I'm still in college and get a little help from my parents (mainly in the form of my father's signature on the loan I will repay). After they divorced last year, I started sending some of my part-time earnings to my mother to help her out, and my father lost his job for about 5 months. It's hard to be 20-something, study 40 hours a week (yes, I really do study that much), and work at any kind of job that would allow for complete financial independence. However, a number of my college friends who receive parental support have done nothing to ease the burden on their parents. When I was a freshmen, my parents gave me money for entertainment, extra food, medications, and anything else I needed. Two years later, my part-time jobs pay for everything I do aside from tuition and rent (student loan). These friends are still getting that "all-inclusive
support I only enjoyed as a freshman, and they're pretty close to graduating. I'm not sure this is good for post-graduation adaptation. In fact, my landlady recently complained about some neighbors whose parents dealt with living arrangement entirely - the parents call in repairs, even! Even if the money is supplied for someone else, having to deal with landlord, creditors, doctors etc. is valuable experience, especially when it starts being one's own money.
I was spoiled rotten as a kid, but there comes a time when you have to grow up. In my case, the divorce forced it a bit earlier than my parents intended, but I'm grateful for every dollar I get and have no credit card debt, like almost all of those said friends. I've survived my summer job layoff because I saved up for it - no college class teaches you that kind of skill. Good luck on independent living! I'm rooting for you!

I definitely agree with many points brought up in this article. I'm almost 27 living in Los Angeles (where we all know costs an arm and a leg to live on your own) and have been on my own since 19. I didn't even go to college, so I don't even have the benefit of having a formal education to give me a leg up in this town. Too many of my friends who come from wealthy families have no clue as to what it is to be financially independent. They drive Mercedes and BMW's paid for by their parents, buy desinger clothes, expensive dinners out, and rack up bar tabs at hot LA clubs on credit cards that their parents pay for, and live at home or have their rent paid by mommy and daddy. And what is so appalling is that they all have college degrees that they don't even use! How many kids out there are busting their butts to put themselves through college because their families can't afford to help them with tuition or living expenses. And these rich kids get a free ride through college, only to take the degree and stick it inside of a Louis Vuitton bag and sponge off their parents' hard earned wealth. What's even worse are the girls whose primary motivation for going to college is to find a rich husband (at least her dad will get a break). Or the "perpetual students" who will continue to use their parents money to go to law school or get their masters as a way to avoid having to actually get a job and support themselves. I actually know people that have said point blank "I don't want to get a real job, so I'm just going to keep going to school as long as I can". While there is definitely something honorable about expanding ones mind with higher education, at least do something with the degree you've earned! Otherwise, you're taking up a spot in school that could otherwise be available to someone who really needs to be there! I think parents are definitely to blame for spoiling their kids and depriving them of the opportunity of being functioning adults in society. Sure, I get jealous at times. I would love to not have debt or worry about how my bills are going to get paid. But I would never want to give up the pride of knowing that everything I have in my life is because of my own hard work.

I am a parent of a 22 yr old (so that tells you my bias) and am gratified by what the article says. I lived in NYC in my twenties and wish I'd had the maturity that Ms. Serafino exhibits. I was also impressed with the comments by steelcitygirl (though might have wished for a little more grace where the aunt & uncle are concerned!). It's true that we value the things we work for more highly than when they are handed over.

Thank you for your refreshing viewpoint. I lived in NYC on my own in my twenties. I only wish I had the maturity you have. I was also impressed with the testament to earning what she had posted by steelcitygirl. My sincere appreciation to you both.

Holy bankroll, batman! Exactly who are these people you are talking about who can afford to do all this for their kids? Including your private-ed paying parents? Whose reality is this? Are these all the top 1% of the top 1% in America? How is this relevant in anyone else's lives? What about all the kids out there in American that work menial or factory jobs as soon as or before they are old enough and never get to have an advanced education, apartment, live in the city, buy an outift or get the opportunity to write for a magazine because of their paid-for credentials? What normal parent can afford to support a separate life for their adult child when they are struggling with their own gas, food and mortgage bills? Wake up and find a story with broader perspective than your outraged private-ed 'independent' tunnel vision allows.
Stop hanging at a trendy hotspot and use your credentials for international or intranational jobs requiring travel and see what life is really like for most people. Then you'll have something real to write about besides your similarly spoiled contemporaries.
cheers
s

Holy bankroll, batman! Exactly who are these people you are talking about who can afford to do all this for their kids? Including your private-ed paying parents? Whose reality is this? Are these all the top 1% of the top 1% in America? How is this relevant in anyone else's lives? What about all the kids out there in American that work menial or factory jobs as soon as or before they are old enough and never get to have an advanced education, apartment, live in the city, buy an outift or get the opportunity to write for a magazine because of their paid-for credentials? What normal parent can afford to support a separate life for their adult child when they are struggling with their own gas, food and mortgage bills? Wake up and find a story with broader perspective than your outraged private-ed 'independent' tunnel vision allows.
Stop hanging at a trendy hotspot and use your credentials for international or intranational jobs requiring travel and see what life is really like for most people. Then you'll have something real to write about besides your similarly spoiled contemporaries.
cheers
s

My mom told me that she raised me to go out and take care of myself, not lean on her all the time. I know how the writer feels because I'm right there. I'm supporting myself in my own apartment, which I found and got on my own, paying all my utilities, found my job, and just doing the day to day on my own. It wasn't easy at first, but I knew if I got into a financial bind (which I have come close to a couple times) my mom would be there to help if I honestly needed it. I'm thankful for the year I lived with mom, when I was student teaching and subbing right after college. And I know she was heartbroken when I found that first place, but she had to keep reminding herself, that means she and my dad did a good job raising me and that I was ready to take on the real world, whatever that is.

I'm thrilled to see others out there determined to be independent. I am 34 years old, and my post-college move was from the East coast to Los Angeles with $400 in my pocket and use of a friend's couch. I never received any funds from my parents after graduation (and I paid at least 1/3 of my tuition via student loans). After years of budgeting, and learning my lessons after racking up a substantial $15,000 credit card debt in my 20's, I live debt free and well within my budget in San Francisco. The world will be run by those who have no idea what it is like to be independent, and rather dependent on others. Just look at our country's dependence on food supplies, oil, power - as a country we have accepted that although we tell ourselves we are free, we are anything but. We need more persons who are independent and self-sufficient so as to see a change in this world.

I completely agree with this article. I am a twenty year old, married, college student ,and yet neither of our parents fork out any cash for any of our expenses. Our parents had always raised us to believe if we wanted something we had to go out and get it ourselves. I love that they had raised us that way. I will admit that it was hard, my first year of college because I had to work 30 hrs a week and go to school, but it was worth it. I learned what working hard meant. Now, my husband and I find ourselves in great if not, better positions than our friends. we don't have to explain why I spent 100 dollars on a pair of shoes. We don't have to ask to go on vacations, ect. We can do what ever we want whenever we want and its nobody's business. Its nice having that freedom and we just wish that our friends will wake up and realize that being financially independent is an amazing feeling when your finances only become your business, not mommy and daddy's. Like the author of the article, we prefer it that way too because our dreams and hopes will never be held back by anybody else's pay check, and we know in the end that we were the only ones that held us back from ever not achieving any of our goals and hopes and dreams, not mom and dad because they wouldn't give us the money to go to europe or buy our first home.

I agree with this article - there is a reason Gen Y is called the Nesting Generation. After college, the majority (that's for you people who think we generalize too much) of students tend to move back in with their parents or family because of the high cost of everything. Being financially independent in this day and age right out of college is probably one of the hardest things to do. Think back 20-30 years ago. College wasn't necessary for many jobs. Now it is mandatory. Graduate school is becoming more and more prevelant. People are getting married at older ages. It's no wonder why financial independence is so hard to come by these days .