A Croc of … Wit

that's right...they look dumb. I'm all for comfortable shoes, and Crocs sure are comfy, but...they're so uuugly...

They may look dumb, but they're comfortable to me. I have issues with my ankles and they are like heaven!

Good morning, the worm, your honour!
The crown will plainly show,
The writer who now stands before you,
Was caught red-handed showing humour.
Showing humour of an almost human nature.
This will not do.

Call the schoolmaster!


I hope, once we regain our economy, our pride, and our country, we can finally regain our sense of humour. That would be a briliant day for America.

I for one have no idea where racism or being un-american comes into view. I enjoyed your artical and agree with it 100 %. Oh, and I laughed as well. So from one loser to another, great job! ( I guess we're just dumbasses to those who are clearly brainless.)

HILARIOUS.
Whoever gets offended by anyone who makes fun of their rubber stank-nasty shoes must have horrible self-esteem.

:D

I'm so glad I found you. A much lighter read after reading nothing but gloom and doom everywhere. Haven't smiled this much in a while. I'm looking forward to the cell phone article. Drives me crazy when people do that!!
And I too wear Crocs, but not so much out in public. More like house slippers.

That was a great article...I look forward to more witicisms such as this one! And yes, would you marry me? :) I love your columns!!
-GraceMH83

Just a quick addition to my post...I really need to proof read before clicking "submit"...my apologies
T. Hainaut

My sister passed this article on to me...after I had read your first one about dork fammilies and crocs. I have to admit...it was hysterical...and I would proose marriage if several others already hadn't beat me to it. I have a family that lives next to me that wears crocs...ALL of them...and THEY MATCH!! This is way above the typical level of croc idiocy...and I would be embarrassed if I was a member of that family. I do actually own one pair, though...purchased on a whim while at the beach, great to wear in the hot sand. I haven't worn them since...dear Lord, they're PINK...I just can't do it. Keep on preaching...I know I'LL be listening! Thanks for the great articles, for passing your wisdom onto the next generation, and for a smile...
Terri Hainaut
Greensburg, PA

First off thank you. I laughed as hard at all these comments as i did when i read your article. I'm fourteen and read Newsweek whenever i get it and always look for your articles now they are hilarious. Just in case people think i only look at the genius funny guy i look at other parts too!

-- Your fan Dan

Crocs are so unworthy of all this ridiculous attention they are getting! They happen to be about the most comfortable shoe I've ever worn, and also the most hideous! I own 5 pairs in 5 colors.
Bottom line: I don't give a flying f_ _ _ in a rolling doughnut what you or anyone else thinks of Crocs. They are there, and they are successful and I wish I had thought of them. But when you look around at all the things we dwell on, I would put them down at around #1500 on my list of important stuff. I never read your article but I imagine it had a few mildly amusing comments. Thanks!

As a fellow croc hater, I view your articles as a public service. Thank you for expressing common sense in a world of "politically correct", clown shoe wearing, flowered sweat plug buying, suburban hippies.

You can add my letter in the pile of "I am absolutely in love with you" responses.

Steve,

You wrote that "several men wanted to do something to me with a shoe that is anatomically impossible."

Doesn't that really depend on how big the shoe is?

This was possibly the best follow-up-to-a-rant article ever written. I hope you can continue sacrificing your reputation to give us entertaining insights into human nature. I might kinda wish I was your son, even though I'm someone else's daughter. I'm sure I'd have a healthier view on the importance of fashion. Best of luck.

I love when grown adults are so self-consious of themselves they get mad at a humorous article about hideous plastic shoes they are wearing. Honestly, the way they all the people getting angry were acting is very much like petty highschool girls. I would know, I'm a sophmore.

Steve - When reading your first article on the nightmare of Crocs I actually burst out laughing and realized it was probably the first time I had done that reading an article in Newsweek. Then when reading your follow-up article I could only shake my head and say to myself 'only in America' - where we have soooo many more important issues to be discussing and folks are sending you death threats and marriage proposals over an article on footwear?! Thanks for the laughs though - we need it!

milktealuver must not know many Americans.

Both articles were hilarious and spot on. Keep 'em coming! I'm all for reading your rants!

I too was going to propose marriage, then read that so many came before me! Getting so heated over footwear? I tell ya, good thing these people dont read my blogs!!