A Survivor's Tale
Since being diagnosed as HIV-positive in 1990, I've managed to reinvent myself at least three times.
I am 49-years-old, attending college full time to obtain my associate's degree, working in fast-food, and HIV positive. I tested positive 18 years ago, and this is the third time since, that I've had to dramatically change my career goals in order to survive. Once again, I am back down to the basics; this time, that means being a student working a low-wage job.
Long-term HIV has a dramatic effect on the careers of individuals who live with it. In many instances, people with HIV have to adapt their professional lives to fit their condition. Change is an arduous journey and often a very scary one. Fitting in one's passion, one's health needs and the need to make a living is a challenging task for any person.
My daily life consists of a strong pharmaceutical regimen that includes five medications for HIV and three to four additional medications to deal with other conditions or side effects. By that I mean emphysema, peripheral neuropathy, skin cancer and gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD)--just to name a few-- which all have been a direct result of either the HIV medications or a weakened immune system. But do not let this fool you; my life is vibrant, and I have long-term goals.
At one time, I did not believe that I would live long enough to achieve any goals beyond surviving today and tomorrow, or at most, the next year or so. Most people I knew in my situation were dying one by one. I was just waiting for my turn. The statistics were not on my side. But I am one of the fortunate ones, I responded well to therapy. One day I had an illuminating discovery: I was still alive, and there was no indication that I was going anywhere soon.
As exhilarating as this epiphany was to me, it was still difficult to look further into the future. I had become so accustomed to looking at only the short term. There are many things that have happened in my life that have helped me to reach out further and longer. Mostly, the people in my life have been the essence of my inspiration. They provide me with the will to live.
Watching my children grow up is something that I thought I would never see. But they're all young adults now, and I'm thankful that I have been allowed the privilege to be here to witness it. And never in my wildest fantasies could I have imagined that I might see any grandchildren, but I have three of them now, and the last one is as precious as the first. Every moment that I spend with them takes my breath away.
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Member Comments
Posted By: romel @ 09/29/2008 1:26:46 PM
Comment: FatJoey, I understand you. I understand how much you hated immorality. The desire of our flesh is wearing us down but I learn a lot from the testimony of this man. Sometimes it is willed that one must pass through the ugliest, darkest corner of his life in order for him to be able to appreciate the boundless beauty of light. One thing I appreciate with this man is that he never even talk about religion yet his struggle inspires my spirit. It's diffecult for one to pick up the pieces and put them back togethere, but this man discovers even more facinating things in life and portrayed a much vibrant picture out of the shattered image he once had when he lost his balance. Fatjoey I take this opportunity to thank you for paying your taxes honestly. Without such honesty there would have been no medical care to help those who are truly in need. FatJoey, like you I hate sin. But the determination of one person to correct the wrong he has done inspires me to love sinners. Thank you.
Posted By: romel @ 09/29/2008 1:21:28 PM
Comment: FatJoey, I understand you. I understand how much you hated immorality. The desire of our flesh is wearing us down but I learn a lot from the testimony of this man. Sometimes it is willed that one must past through the ugliest, darkest corner of his life in order for him to be able to appreciate the boundless beauty of light. One thing I appreciate with this man is that he never even talk about religion yet his struggle inspires my spirit. It's diffecult for one to pick up the pieces and put them back togethere, but this man discovers even more facinating things in life and portrayed a much vibrant picture out of the shattered image he once had when he lost his balance. Fatjoey I take this opportunity to thank you for paying your taxes honestly. Without such honesty there would have been no medical care to help those who are truly in need. FatJoey, like you I hate sin. But the determination of one person to correct the wrong he has done inspires me to love sinners. Thank you.
Posted By: romel @ 09/29/2008 1:20:40 PM
Comment: FatJoey, I understand you. I understand how much you hated immorality. The desire of our flesh is wearing us down but I learn a lot from the testimony of this man. Sometimes it is willed that one must past through the ugliest, darkest corner of his life in order for him to be able to appreciate the boundless beauty of light. One thing I apprecite with this man is that he never even talk about religion yet his struggle inspires my spirit. It's diffecult for one to pick up the pieces and put them back togethere, but this man discovers even more facinating things in life and portrayed a much vibrant picture out of the shattered image he once had when he lost his balance. Fatjoey I take this opportunity to thank you for paying your taxes honestly. Without such honesty there would have been no medical care to help those who are truly in need. FatJoey, like you I hate sin. But the determination of one person to correct the wrong he has done inspires me to love sinners. Thank you.