Struggling School-Age Boys

I don't know if I would blame this situation on the lack of male role models in schools, as some suggested, because teaching in grade schools has always been a predominantly female profession, but these trends didn???t exist.

It's not just the home, overmedicalization, schools, the government, or society. It's a culmination of influences, and the circumstances will differ based on a given child???s experience. One thing I will say is handicapping children is legislation that prevents a holistic approach to education, favors teaching to tests, places an additional burden on schools, and ignores the concerns of parents. It's a major factor, but not the ONLY one.

I'd be interested to know what are the "behavioral and emotional problems." Brash behavior has always been coded masculine, but we're shifting from the "boys will be boys" mentality that excused it. With the increase of violent entertainment, media coverage of schools shootings, etc, we're curbing it.

Furthermore, we???ve been eliminating the patriarchy that was prevalent in our institutions. While this is well intentioned, we may only be creating a new gendered code that prizes women over men feeding the trends that we're seeing with boys, since they are being neglected at the expense of aiding their female peers. Then again, women have traditionally been the more coddled gender, with people believing that they were in need of protection, so I'm not convinced that a disparity between boys and girls is causing this, but rather a change in the way that we address the hostility that we previously overlooked. Furthermore, therapy is becoming more commonplace in society, so I'm not surprised that parents are more comfortable bringing their children to a psychologist than before. Thus, it's natural that the number of people, including children, being diagnosed with mental or behavioral problems has increased.

oops! grammatical

Archangelo at least 24 spelling and gramatical errors, Where are you going to college?

This just makes me think what I have been thinking all along. That all boys schools and all girls school have a strong benefit to them. It would be great if we could teach boys and girls in the same school but in different classrooms. Boys and girls do learn completely differently and the school system has always (since I was in it) been geared more towards the way that girls learn.

I agree as far as it goes. How about another factor - DIET!!! The stuff served in many schools is not fit for kids to eat and lacks the nutrients needed for good brain function and good emotional health!

Cause we beat off too much

pretty much everyone is saying the same thing here so turn off your computer and go make a difference and while you're at it lift someone up

I worked in an elementary school setting for 5 years, and it is commmon practice to stiffle boys' tendency to be aggressive and competitive in the interest of giving equal opportunity to girls. Boys are taught to be more passive, rather than teaching girls to be more aggressive in competitive situations. When a teacher openly states that she is not going to call on a boy that is eager to offer an answer because she, "needs to hear from one of the girls," then there is a serious problem. Our schools need to turn their backs on gender politics, and focus on promoting competitiveness between students regardless of external social constructs. Nurture all students equally. Establishing a system that promotes female students, while assuming that the male students will continue to thrive regardless is asinine. The present system needs to deal with present circumstances rather than making up for past inequities.

I found this article to be extremely interesting and I was excited to see an atricle blaming the parents for soe things. I agree that child rearing is different now than when I was growing up, although I do not agree with everything my parents did, we did have reasonable expectations to live up to. We work with him at home and read to him often and check his homework and spell in the car. However, we also push him to go outside and play. Video games are not allowed during the week in the school year, making the limited time on the weekend more special to him. He is allowed to play after half his homework is done, but this has not only helped his school work, it has helped him emotionally and socially. When I came into his life, his emotional levels were sub-par and would not communicate with people. It is parents involvement and rules that help give children the boundries that are needed to decipher between good and bad. When I see children slap there parents and then get something they want at a store, I get disgusted with how parents are allowing themselves to get walked on. As a society we need to all wake up and realize that spoiling and pushing our kids is not the way to go.

I got to say, i was one of those kids growing up. I spent more time drawing then doing homework. All through elementry through high school i got C, D, and F's. Graduated by the skin of my teeth. Now in Collage i get B, and A's.... (Snickers). Our public system of education doesnt need more money throw at it. That just alows the teachers to put their students in front of a monotor rather than use their imaginations. Another problem is we now hear about every bad thing that could possible happen in the world, we so over protect our kids that they arnt aloud to think for themselves. My 10 year old cousins still arnt aloud to cross the street unsupervised. We dont need more drugs, we need boys to be boys. Quit cottoling your kids, worring what his teachers going to say and spank your DAMN children! Boys are stricken the hardest right now because its more social exceptable to be gay then to desplay any kind of mochoism, we have demasculated the male image so much, that real boys dont know what to do. Most boys these days are with single moms that wont punish there kids or raised but step dads that are stripped of power because their not the birth father. Is it reaily any mystery our boys are so confused. LET THE PLAY!....Metrosexuals not ok....

Obviously, raggedyanne seems to be a disgruntled parent who has had a negative experience with a few teachers. Please do not lash out at all teachers because of a few who may not have met your sons' educational needs. I am a teacher. I am at school many nights until 6 p.m. trying to find all of the educational tools to enhance my lessons so students will be excited about learning. I encourage them to read daily to improve their comprehension skills and I provide my own books for them to take home. I create powerpoints to reach my visual learners, I use math manipulatives to reach my kinesthetic learners, and I encourage group discussions to reach my auditory learners. I work with amazing teachers and they work equally as hard as myself. My passion is my students and their success and I have great difficulty with someone using all of the generalized statements that I've just read from that last post. More parents need to go into classrooms and watch the dynamics of what goes on, The truth is, there's just not enough time in the day to teach everything. Many teachers that I work with will agree with this article. However, we strive for our students' success and it is such an insult to hear a person say that we are in it just for the salary. Just how much do you think we make???? What a joke.

So if this is a problem then what is the solution? I am tired of people telling me my son could be having problems because of this and that , when I think that kids today need to get of the games and go imagine somthing. With all the computers and video games that are out there what is left to the imagination?
I do agree with the testing on top of the homework my son had last year he also had to study for testing and his teacher made it sound more important than his homework .
There are a lot of things wrong in the world today but let us as parents start doing our job. To all the educatord you know that this testing is getting out of hand so get together and change some things let our Government know the system is not working

Children need to be involed in activities with their parents or caretakers, such as a group of adults and children playing games together, a real bible study, volunteering, etc. Our children need to see how their parents act in these situations. They need the adult role modeling in real life situations. Almost all things are divided into children and group activities. Many caregivers do not have the children work beside them in just everyday chores. If you are washing clothes, have the children help sort, put some clothes in the washer or dryer. Work together, play together and grow together. You'll find children will follow your lead and are not as stressed, because the are learning, gain confidence and pride.

As a boy back in the early 1970's, I can remember feeling alienated by change. Back then it wasn't the
sweeping changes that we have today. It was more like, why is the neighborhood so different now? Am
I allowed to use my calculator during a math test? Do I look cool enough to approach that girl? Am I too
sensitive to other peoples opinions? Some of these things still exist, but on a much more intense level.
Kids today, especially boys need "plenty" of support from thier parents, especially from their fathers.
It doesn't matter about toys, gadgets, and clothes all the time. If a boy is artistic and creative like I was,
"the alpha male" syndrome that parents unrealistically push on a boy can be as bad as the corner store
bully. I went through "hell" sometimes, just trying to get this "approval" from my dad, who was basically a
distant critic. Boy's today are dealing with a world that is spinning in all sorts of directions, and having a
spiritual base is very important. In my boyhood there was no debate on whether or not "In God We Trust"
should still be on dollar bills. Having a strong faith in God has eroded over time, within the fabric of today's society and belief system. What are boys supposed to believe in, if women can go to a sperm bank and
eliminate the need of a physical father. The balance of the male/female species has been corrupted, but
not beyond repair...
and everyone feels entitled

This sure hit a hot button! I am not sure it is a gender issue. I have two girls and when they did not get enough physical activity, they could be hard to get along with. I had to really limit their TV time (and other activities that were not physical) to keep harmony in the family. My girls also did better at any task when they had a break now and then (like most adults). Sitting still for too long a period was very hard for them - they had no disorders and were good students - but they were typical, active kids.

And some of you are talking about bullies - I had one daughter that was the target of male and female bullies - and the female bullies had the boys beat hands down when it came to being wicked!

I was part of a playground project in Tyler, Tx in the early 90's back when my kids were young. An elementary school with 1000 students had not one piece of play equipment on their barren "playground". The kids stood around at "recess" and then no one could figure out why the boys got into fights. We actually had a few parents that thought that recess was a total "waste of time". I had one question for them" are you willing to give up any and all breaks at your place of work? oh, and you have 25 minutes to eat your lunch - and no talking either!

Expecting a child to be displined in school when they are running wild at home, ruling the roost is like expecting a pig to fly. Alot of people blame it on the educational system when it starts at home a few years before they even go to school. If you don't want your kid to act up at school don't let them act up at home. Make time to be with your kids instead of taking them to soccor practice once they get out of school. More than likely they will never be a superstar athlete, it would be wiser to invest in music lessons.

Stop parking your baby in front of the TV in a jumpy swing and letting your two year old play on the computer. Don't let them watch TV without you sitting right there with them. Most childrens TV shows depict parents as stupid and moronic with no ethics or morals. Make them do chores around the house and award them with an allowance instead of letting them have free reign over your wallet or buying them whatever they want. Do not raise them like they are little god or goddesses, yes they need self-esteem, but not at the expense of your sanity. Stop making excuses for your childs behavior when you will not disipline the brats. As a child I was expected to do well in school as were the rest of the 8 children in the family. We were expected to do our homework and forced to do chores. We were forced to sit still in church for 1 hour every Sunday. We were taught to aim high and today are all productive, business owners who employ large numbers of people in our respective businesses. The desire to succeed stems from the parents.

Don't blame it on the public schools when your child has no manners or lacks respect for adults when you didn't teach them to respect your authority from day one. If you can't afford the TIME and effort it takes to raise a child properly then you should have considered it before you had them and opted for a pet that you could treat like a child.