Struggling School-Age Boys

Kids especially boys need to be able to have time to play. And when a boy "acts up" maybe he should be given some time to run around instead of time in the corner. Boys are no more wild they they use to be, society is just less accepting of their behavior. Give these kids a break and take them to the park! Kids are supposed to have tons of energy.

Our young boys are having sociological problems because they don't have enough recess time? Or because the elementary school curriculum is too demanding? ADHD? You forgot another possibility: Perhaps they were deprived of Cherrios at a young age, We need to get a government grant and a team of researchers on that.

If our public school system was actually teaching our young people, we wouldn't have slipped from near the top in the world, to out of the top ten, globally. Unless, by "demanding education," you mean "gender-sensitivity" classes, or the kindergarten condom class.

How about just letting boys be male, and quit demanding they put on crash helments, knee-pads, safety belts, eye-safety goggles and a backing up, alert beeper on their training-wheel bicycles? The minute a boy DOES show a little "maleness", we want to drug them up, and make them more passive.
How about letting them live in a world where the sexes are actually different. Maybe he doesn't need to grow up in a world with government-mandated, baby changing tables in his public restroom. Genetically, he is a boy, a male, soon to be a man, regardless of how many times he's pressed not to act like one. Perhaps his male role in the world has been so far removed by the "I AM WOMAN" crowd, he's embarrassed and confused where he's supposed to fit in.

Just drug him up, show him how to put that condom on a banana, and don't forget to remind him that women are his competition, not someone he needs to protect and defend. Perhaps if we just gave them dolls to play with instead of tractors, they'd finally get it.

It could be that politically correct ideals are finally taking its toll. Boys are not allowed to play like, well boys!
They are suppose to play with kids that they do not want to play with.
Just a father of four with my 10 year old son left in school.

I'm a freshman in highschool. I lost my recess in the third grade completely, and in the second, I went out maybe, a grand total of two times. I'm a girl, but I feel that terrible urge to do something all the time in class. They're loading me up - besides the fact that I have all Honors Gifted classes and 1 AP class and I'm coming to regret that decision to take all those classes. I'm overwhelmed, and find myself working till past midnight. I'd be doing homework now, only I can't find the online textbook my Algebra II teacher told me to use. TT.TT The point is, yes, both girls and boys need recess and are losing it drastically. :/ And some people are saying 'oh, what's wrong with, that? so what? finally girls get favored', but that's reverse sxism. :/

All kids need the freedom to play and release a little energy. They shouldnt be expected to sit in a classroom all day. They function better when they have that time to relax and exercise.

we are the ones who are making them incapable of sitting through a class, or maybe even the ones who are beating

I think this goes for girls too. The whole idea that boys are by nature more rambunctious is b.s. The reason boys are having trouble in structured environments more than girls are is simply because from the time they are born, girls are taught to "play nice." They arent allowed to fight and wander and do a lot of the things that little boys do - just because we think they can't handle it.

There are studies that indicate boys spatial intelligence being better simply because they are allowed to wander further from their mothers.

So what am I saying through all of this? The problem isn't that we're trapping boys inside schools and causing them to go crazy. Kids need the freedom to explore - boys and girls alike. Buying boys toy guns and allowing them to fight "because they're boys," and this whole "boys will be boys" mentality in general is what is damaging our sons.

Think about how many men you know who have intimacy issues, or anger issues, or who have no idea how to hold a baby. This isn't biological, people. This is learned behavior and we are teaching it. You'll see the same thing from girls who allowed to wander and fight and misbehave a little more than other girls.

This article fails to examine the social conditioning behind these behaviors.

Boys need space to be boys. They do not need to be fixed the just need to run, play and explore.Over fixing boys is giving them the belief they are broken, they aren't they are just not girls. Yeah we need boys to be boys so they can grow up to be awesome men. Let's just llet them grow as boys,t as they mature they can be fully all they were ment to be.

Sarahasm wrote, "Does that mean he needs more mental health services? Or do we need to dedicate more time and money to evaluate academic achievement? I think the answer is no. We need to change the way we teach boys. We need more active lesson plans. We need to attract more well-rounded, experienced, and (may I even suggest?) male teachers. Our boys (and girls) need more time outside in nature. More science!!!! The reading, writing and critical thinking will follow"

That's not new, thats old school. And your wrong about only one thing, it WOULD show up positively in test scores.

And Diane727 a kid who can't keep his hands to himself in Kindergarden is NORMAL. You are falling into the school's trap. Medication won't make him feel normal, it will make the school's job easier and your child will be "under control" When your child tells you "he's a bad kid" He's not coming up with that himself. Would anyone like a place that constantly corrects you and sends you to the principal's office?

Before medication, I would talk to your own pediatrician, not a school nurse or physican.. If you're strong enough to not let others tell you what is normal, it may be in his best interest to start school a year later when he develops more. Starting Kindergarden one year later, isn't going to hurt the boy and could be very helpful. As long as you don't lament over it.

I work in an Elementary School. This article is completly true. Due to the "No Child Left Behind" act, the demand on the teachers is unbelievable.Which comes from the School District, which comes from the State, and so on and so on. You see where I am headed. It is true that all we teach is to test! I find it incredibly frustrating and sad, especially for the children. But, our hands are tied. The threat is, if your school district does not reach said scores from testing, ect. You will then lose State funding; because, obviously you are not teaching the children and they are not getting good scores. So in turn your School District gets a bad or failing report card! Look out if the scores are not brought up, bye, bye money. This means loss of jobs, your school's name goes in a paper and on the internet for everyone to see just how bad or good your school has done. You don't want everyone and anyone seeing that you are not up to par. So the answer is...TEACH THE CHILDREN TO TEST!! Shove as much information into their little heads as you possibly can in a 7 hour day, 4 to 5 days a week. So there isn't time for Art or Play or getting to learn how to play or grow with other kids. That is a fact. No matter how wrong or right or sad, that's just how it is. There isn't enough time a day for alot of the nurturing that you and I may have gotten when we were kids, not that they don't care or aren't kind, it's just different; because, I remember how it was when I was in school. The District is monotoring and breathing down the teachers necks to GET THERE SCORES HIGHER! The stress on teachers today is truely unbelievable. They have only so much time to get all the information out there to the kids because, guess what...were testing again. Didn't do so good first go round, well, you have x amount of time until the next testing time. Three times to test to get everyone to get a passing score. No time for anything else. Our kids don't have the chance to be kids anymore and do alot of the fun things that you and I did as children in
school. It is enough to send an adult over the edge, let alone a 4 year old, and on up! The No Child Left Behind Act, well, the intent was well meaning but, honestly it is just something that is to much pressure for those involed that have to try to make it happen, not just come up with the act itself, but now achieve what the act is. It's no surprise that our children need medication, just as it is no surpise as a whole most of our society needs medication. It is good to have high expectations but, they have to be realist as well. I wish I had the answers but, unfortunatly there is none in sight. Each year the scores for the children to pass these test keep going up!! More pressure on teachers, more stress on children, less free time to be a kid.

boys naturally have a tendancy towards rough and unstructured play. This is historically how we / they learn leadership skills. taking that away from them with such a structured schedule can only be detrimental towards their social developement. (something schools notoriously neglect to consider) It's all well and good to be acedemically sound. However a leader has strong social skills and leans on those with the smarts beneath him.. Today's scholastic structure does not do anything to help young boys excel in this arena.

I have an eight year old boy who is a wonderful kid. He's also what I like to call a "big space" kid. He can pop a wheelie on his mountain bike and hop a curb better than most teenagers and men, for that matter. He is also extremely adept with tools and construction projects. He managed to remove a dryer door with a screw driver at age three. He just installed the four-bike rack into our hitch. My son has also been called an "up" kid. His first big art project was a 3-D painting of a ladder going up into the sky. A friend suggested that he's just one of those kids that likes to view the world from above. He happens to love climbing. At a very early age I would find him sitting on an arbor over our fence waving at the neighbors. I was mortified, both for his safety and for what the neighbors would think. But, I think he needs to be up, above, being physical, and evaluating the world below. He???s also very social. He loves to interact with the other kids. Maybe even, challenge them a little on the soccer field. I admit he needs constant attention. Unlike his sister, he doesn???t enjoy just hanging out, reading a book, beading, or making believe. He even has a tendency to bug her and make her quiet, alone time, less quite and less alone. Instead of joining her in a mentally challenging activity, he would prefer collecting and freezing bees or jumping on the trampoline with his sister. So to no surprise, he doesn???t overachieve at reading. Sure, he can read. His handwriting is improving. And guess what? He is quick at math. And unsurprisingly, recess is his favorite part of school. In addition to being a social, big space, up kid, I like to think of him as a new age guy. This summer he began baking cookies, grilling hot dogs, and his favorite, mowing the lawn. Knowing all of this, do you wonder why school has been a bit challenging? I???m convinced my boy belongs on a farm with his academic education coming later in life. He???s meant to be outside, experiencing nature, navigating social situations and uncontrolled risks. Is he going to go college? Hell yeah! Is he going to succeed? Hell yeah! Will he do it in the same way his sister does? Will he reach academic milestones in the predetermined time or order? Likely the answer is no. Does that mean he needs more mental health services? Or do we need to dedicate more time and money to evaluate academic achievement? I think the answer is no. We need to change the way we teach boys. We need more active lesson plans. We need to attract more well-rounded, experienced, and (may I even suggest?) male teachers. Our boys (and girls) need more time outside in nature. More science!!!! The reading, writing and critical thinking will follow. The test scores, however, might not. But who cares? I believe it is our job to raise confident boys; boys that are caring and environmental stewards; boys that understand consequences; and boys that experience success, everyday, in the classroom!

Ah...but so many people who have never sat inside an over-crowded classroom or in a faculty meeting or at a district initiative meeting or after school with a struggling student feel free to comment on what is only their own perception of the teachers in our American schools. Teaching is the scapegoat profession, and, though the educational system is flawed and could use reform, it is only one weak link in an ever-weakening chain. Many parents blame the teachers before they reflect upon the potential flaws of their own parenting. Admittedly, the system is failing in its current implementation; however, too many good teachers are bearing the brunt of parental attacks, and the burn-out rate for quality teachers is increasing. Society as a whole needs to recognize teachers as professionals (Katie Couric grouped teachers into the "blue collar" category while she broadcasted at the Democratic Convention--a blatant disregard for the education and commitment of the only people in society who work exclusively for the betterment of our children) and fight WITH them for educational reform. Parents and teachers are supposed to collaborate for the good of the child--many people in our society need a reminder of that fact. Perhaps if some parents (usually the ones who complain the most) asked as much from themselves as they ask of our teachers real collaboration would be possible. Until the home/school divide is breeched, we shouldn't expect our current situation to improve.

By the way working parents can turn off the TV and read together as a family if Mom and Dad are on the same page with the priority of the childrens deveolpment in the right direction.

Just this past week there was a great series on Focus on the Family with Dr,James Dobson on this very subject. It can be heard on the web at their site and I would also recommend Wild At Heart by John Eldredge for every parent and adolescent in America. Boys are little men that God has given gifts and and characters to for very special leadership roles in family structure.In the ways we as a society are off track here the many evils of our society can be readily explained. It all starts at home and in the family settings. So we need to take a moment and check the original plan and start again. Check out the web or the book and see if it doesn't make real sense to you.

You can start by reading to your kids some of the greatest stuff ever written instead of family T.V. time. The book Wild At Heart by John Eldredge and a recent series at Focus on the family on the web with Dr.James Dobson help adult and adolescent males see which direction to head for the young mens
development into the strong leaders of spiritual homes in America. Blessings