Struggling School-Age Boys

I haven't read the comments yet, but before I gather other opinions, my first thought is that the problem lies within the breakdown of the traditional family and the belief that boys and girls are wired the same. The cause of the paradigm shift is radical, and maybe even moderate, feminism. No one seems to care about the wellfare of men, who make up the majority of homeless and disabled and who account for the majority of work related accidental deaths, and worst of all, suicides. End feminism. Its goals have been met. Women are pampered and catored to by society at large, not oppressed.

WOW!!! Finally, someone hit the nail right on the head. Too much stress on the poor kids. I have 2 school-age boys right now. They can't be kids anymore. Now they get homework to do over the summer so they can keep "boned up" on academics so the schools can acheive higher rankings on state tests in order to get more $$$$$$!!!! That's what it's all about, not the kids. Shame on the educational system for making our kids hate school.

I am a father of three who has an MBA in applied management who thinks education is important and I am involved in my kid???s education. I found this article to be realistically surprising and to reveal a strong and deep need for change in our society. We need to strive for excellence in education with responsibility and balance in our children's overall development when helping them to reach their educational goals. When did learning become as complex as a 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. job for children? Medication is not the microwave solution. Responsibility and leadership from families, government leaders, business leaders, and education experts for the changing rudiments of our environment, and society while putting kid???s FIRST beginning with their emotional well being is a viable solution that I believe is achievable in this country. Our culture is in such a hurry as never before, and I'm concerned that this is showing as diminishing returns in our children's (i.e. boys) total well-being. It is time to make some serious changes here, even if it means going back to what worked in the past and aligning it for future success in today???s culture.

School are only responding to pressures from both parents and government regulations. So they having to teach to the test. Test scores have become the only way schools, teachers and student are evaluated. So, recess is cut shorter, art is cut, music,...and so on. because these things are not considered important by the people who are requiring all of the standardized testing. Teacher's pay and jobs are on the line because of these tests.

Teachers must constantly be on guard during recess to prevent any harm or injury however minor out fear of suit by sue happy parents.

Parents are ultimately responsible for their children's education. Stop blaming others for your child's problems in school if you are not doing everything you can at home to help your child. Reading to them at a young age, have them read to you, home work is the priority, ... and so on.

As a teacher, I don't think the schools have changed that much in the last decade. However, I have seen a major shift in the ratio of academically advanced boys to girls. When I was a student ,and even when I started teaching in the early 90s, there was a higher percentage of advanced students who were male. Now, the advanced females outnumber the males two to one. I believe the lack of a male role model at home is a major factor. In some schools, as many as 90% of the boys live with a single mother. Who do they look to as a role model? In most cases, egotistical athletes and entertainers who live for themselves and promote immediate gratification. The ever-increasing presence of cell phones, computers and video games also promote the need for constant interaction and entertainment. An increase in interactive lessons in school could make a difference. But education is slow to change and schools are facing tighter budgets, overcrowded classes, and ridiculous standards set by government officials with no educational background. In the near future I see no change in the trend of the declining male student.

I've seen some crazy things in Chicago schools. Lack of recess, lunchtime where the students aren't allowed to talk or make any noise. The best is the principal who walks around with a bullhorn, like a character out of a John Hughes movie. Seriously. Last year my son's classroom had a 29% failure rate.

This year, I put my son in a private school where they have recess and talk to the kids like people and let the kids be kids. He loves school now, and is doing really, really well.

Kids are kids, not small adults. They need down time.

School grades aren't the most important thing in the world. I've never had anyone ask me what my GPA was in college, and I've had to let people go who had phenomenal grades throughout school but were complete morons, and had people who barely got through high school come in who were exceptionally organized and sharp, independant thinkers.

The school system has largely lost it's purpose. Parents too. I spend a good amount of time with my kids, and give them a good amount of time to figure things out on their own and play with their friends. There's too much homework. I wonder how many teachers go home and do an extra hour and a half of work nightly. That's the time when kids should be doing chores and learning to be responsible real people, and it's been taken away.

In Chicago there's been a lot of change, including changes to the curriculum while the rubric (percentage to letter grade determination) have changed. The failure rates have skyrocketed, and the kids are depressed. In many grade levels in Chicago a D is a failiing grade, so anyone with a 73% or lower fails.

All that's accomplishing is making kids give up. The drop out rate here is going to skyrocket, and the poeple in charge of the schools seem to just not get it. I wonder how their grades were, and if they ever got to play? If this is the way that they lived their lives as children, I wonder if they're happy people.

Without getting on my own personal soapbox here, I am recommending to everyone truley committed to helping our children, to read Richard Louv's "The Last Child In the Woods-Saving Our Children From Nature-Deficit Disorder". To quote Louv, "To take nature and natural play away from children may be tantamount to withholding oxygen." We need to stop the blame-game and start educating ourselves.

This story is one hundred percent accurate. Our elementary schools are engineered to suppress natural boy behavior--less recess, fewer sports, highly regimented classrooms. There is also a huge lack of male teachers because men have been driven out of the profession. Boys need male role models just as much as girls need female role models, but most boys will never see a male teacher until high school. We need to start recognizing that boys have value and that a system that works for girls does not work for boys. Is the next necessary step simply a great leap forward into the past: same-sex schools?

My children's school has cut recess back to 15 minutes per day for every grade including Kindergarten. They will take that away as punishment for behavior problems, or if extra time is needed to finish in-class assignments or make-up work in the case of an absence.

There is a wonderful book called "Wild At Heart" by John Eldredge and another called "Raising Boys" by Dr. James Dobson. I have read them both and review them now and again as a simple reminder of the needs of my two young sons from a man's perspective.

Homeschooling looks better and better with every study that surfaces about our public schools!

My son is in first grade now. he is having a very hard time getting his work finished durning school. So there for he gets in trouble by his teacher for not getting i finished and i am expected to punish him for it. I am soo upset because i look at the work he is doing and it is for second or third grade kids. Now granted he is the youngest of his class but did very well in kindergarden. He is expected to know to to count to 100 well he was only taught how to count to 50 last year. We are in ky so school here has only been back in session for 3 weeks. Also he is thought to know how to subract and add from a 100. It seems very easy for me but it is really hard for him because he is still learning how to count to 100. he has reading every night. he does very well with his reading. Also he has a spelling test every week. One of his words for this week is responsibility to me they are shoving to much on them at one time and they arent taking the time to teach it to these kids. Which i understand that as i parent i am to be the one to help teach him but it would help if the teachers would do what they are paid to do instead of giving it to them and putting a note on it saying that this must be done by friday along with the reading log from the week, and the spelling log, and also the math. he is not an only child and it is difficult giving him the time he needs to work on this at home and the teachers dont care about it. Parents have lives too and what about the parents who wont take the time to teach their kids what they need to learn for the school year??

WOW someone has opened thier eyes. I have an 11 year old who just started 6th grade in middle school. My son has struggled all through elementary school. All because of the "no child left behind" my son is pushed into the next grade barely passing the one he was just in. It's virtually immpossible for a parent to have thier child held back if they are passing (barely) My son is ADHD and onmedication (which I hate) but it does help him concentrate on tasks. I think schools are more focused on where they stand when it comes to SOL tests. They focus on being the best school but not teaching kids the basics. I know the curriculum has changed since I was in school but my son comes home with work that I can't do. If I were on the show "are you smarter than a 5th grader" I would not make it passed the first question. The one thing that really bothers me is both my boys have a hard time reading a analog clock. In our schools every thing is digital so the kids give up after they have been taught. As far as recess being taken out of the picture. Kids need a break. Come on people these kids are so overwhelmed that thier little minds can only handle but so much. Wake up America. Do something to help the children not the school.

My son is five. After his third week in Kindergarten, his teacher came to me and told me my son definately has Adhd and I should seriously think about treating him for it. I thought this was a little strange as he was in school for the first time and was just adjusting. Several more weeks went by and I got phone calls from the principal and his teacher that my son was "out of control". I was horrified to think that my son was a problem child. We talked to his pediatrician who said he would not treat him until he was six, but we could have an evaluation done and get him in to see a counselor. By mid year my son would tell me he was a bad boy and didn't deserve to do fun things. It was breaking my heart! Finally, after the school system demanded he be put on medication or he would be kicked out of school, we broke down and gave it to him. It did help for a while and things started to go back to "normal"(the way they were before school started), but then he started having tics and we went through one medication after another. He just wasn't the same kid he was before. The point of my story is that my son is six years old now and he is only in first grade, but has already been through the ringer just to get through school thus far. His self esteem is shot, which we are trying to build back up. These school districts need to realize what they are doing to our kids. I had a fun, loving, happy little boy when he started and now he is sad all of the time. How can that be a good thing? Why are we pushing our kids so hard? We parents didn't have to work so hard and we are just as intelligent and capable of working or getting a job as the next guy.

Little boys should not be denied play-time at all, because with out it how would they dream of becoming astronauts & presidents? I have an 11 yr. old son & i don't want him to have pent up anger or no way to express himself. I have 5 brothers & we all had no choice but to play outside. But my brothers also express themselves differently than i do. Boys NEED playtime to explore & discover who they want to be when they grow up. I believe if you constuct every minute of a childs day, when they grow up they'll never move out of your house for fear of dependency. Free range play time stimulates so many things for young boys....WHY would anyone dream of taking it away? Maybe the ones who do "studies" like this didn't have happy child hoods or playtime them selves? Kids can't learn self respect with out having the chance to find out who they are & what they can do through PLAYING!!

In today's world it definitely is pretty tough for kids. Growing up was never easy but it has become all the more mechanical & artificial. Kids in the US have some "free time" after school, unlike the vaste majority of children in Asian countried who psnd their time in school or tuitions, starting from the very young age of FOUR!! For exampla, in India, 4-year-olds go through entrance tests to get into kindergarten. Which means tht they should already have a knowledge of wht they wil learn in school. And once in first year of kindergarten (which they call LKG, ie, lower kindergarten), a child has learned the alphabets (and knows by heart), learned numbers, colors, the four basic shapes, etc. How they do it, God knows. But US should keep up to tht. One imporant thg is definitely discipline. Kids in the West have way too much of laws "protecting" them. We're not talking of chid abuse here. A good spank at times does help. This is wht brigs in respect for parents, teachers, elders, society, etc. Wht happened to school uniforms? Wht happened to holistic development? Instead of bringing in guns to schools to shoot friends, kids should instead bring in their little brains to feed them. And all tht comes from discipline

I so agree with this article. My grandson has ADHD and was given an ISP to "help" him in school. I tried to have him held back since 2nd grade but because of this special help, I was told they weren't allowed to keep him back, so he has been "pushed" through to the 6th grade with the knowledge of a 1st grader. How is he supposed to make it in this world. He is on medication and therapy but that doesn't seem to help with his learning ability. It is a constant struggle to have him do homework when, neither he nor I understand it. Way to far advanced for me and I had some college.

My wife is an O.T. (Occupational Therapist) for a school and she believes the biggest problems with most of these boys is the lack of recess and free play. That freedom to run wild and get your blood pumping solves most attention issues. Your body requires a certain level of activity to perform effectively. Sitting on your butt all day staring at a book and listening to a teacher just doesn't cut it. Recess isn't that answer to everything. but it does make the child easier to guide and teach IF they have time to get the andrenylin pumping. If you have a child that fits the ADD, ADHD, Autism, or whatever profile - your school is required to offer therapy services for you during the school year. Take advantage of that. It's like a Dr.'s note to get away from the teacher and play for 1-2 hours a week. Trust me, the O.T.'s at your school are on your side. They believe in free play, recess, and child interaction. It's the basis of their profession. Instead of drugging your children, send them to an O.T. They will teach you how to keep your children active and achieve the same results as "drugging" them without the drugs. Drugs are the easy answer for lazy parents. But if you want to get involved with your childs health, consult an O.T. There will be some upfront work but it all becomes habitual after awhile and teaches your children good study habits, work habits, and ways to concentrate.

Hi, been in education for more than 22 years now - in Bulgaria (Europe). Absolutely agree that few educators pay attention to the fact that that boys and girls study in different ways. Brains work differently. No comparison implied - it is just different. In BG boys struggle a lot cos of this. Exams in BG are also girl-oriented. Been research.