Struggling School-Age Boys

I totally agree with what you are saying. I've been debating on whether or not to home school my 2 year old for these very reasons. I've seen what the school system does to both boys and girls firsthand and it scares me!

I had thought the schools were responsible for teaching my boys to read and write and while I did read to them nightly as toddlers (and continue to do so) and teach them some fundamentals, I didn't try to teach them to read beyond a few words. They were both considered "behind" and required special reading assistance when they entered first grade (and they both were in pre-school bu tit was play oriented). I also feel the effects of the shift from "teaching to boys" to "teaching to girls" and feel both genders could benefit from more active, hands on learning environments and differentiated teaching styles, but its just not happening. In my "upscale" suburb that is considered to have excellent schools, they are definitely teaching to the standardized test. Sigh.

I totally agree with what you are saying. I've been debating on whether or not to home school my 2 year old for these very reasons. I've seen what the school system does to both boys and girls firsthand and it scares me!

I let my boys be boys and play when they were toddlers. I read to them every night but beyond teaching them colors, shapes, number and ABCs, I didn't try to "prep" them for school...i thought that school was supposed to teach them to read not me! But I was wrong and now we are trying to play catch up. My boys are not overscheduled and I try to give them lots of free play time, but there aren't many others in the neighborhood to play with as the rest are all over scheduled. And, since they are now "behind" in reading and writing, we spend lots of time after school on homework. Sigh. In our school district, I definitely feel the shift from teaching to boys to teaching to girls and the "teach to the test" mentality. Differentiated teaching is not happening.

Has anyone ever considered how discipline is carried out now . In consideration to the years past? I do realize that there have been abuses of discipline. I wonder if this is what the good book meant when it read "Spare the rod spoil the child"? I have a 2 1/2 year old son that is constantly disobedient to his mother and I. We put him in time out,because thats what we do in todays society. I take myself back to my own upbringing. If my grandmother had to ask me 20 times to shut the refridgerator door then I would be cutting a switch off a tree. I never ate or drank in the living room. The carpet in their living room wore out. Ours is 2yrs old and is ruined. I was taught to address my elders as sir and maam. I was taught to respect my teachers. I feel as if we are failing our boys at earlier ages than school. We all want better for our children than we had,are we really bettering them? Where does reform begin? Is it really our schools job to raise ,discipline, educate and diagnose our childrens every sucess and failure. I don't know the answer just a point to ponder.

Why don't you teach your kids how to defend themselves, mentally? Just because some body says that you're mentally deficient doesn't make is so unless you believe it. Don't you know anything about psychology? Stand up for yourselves and teach your children the same thing. You don't have to believe someone else's bullshit, their analysis or take on you or your child. But you blame a system or a school. It's been a long time since I let another person determine what's WRONG WITH ME by analyzing my behavior or criticizing me. You know what? Life's been good ever since. Jesus and God in heaven above, stand up for yourselves. Or just stand around bleeting like helpless sheep.

I have two little boys of my own now and I am very concerned with what they have to know to even be considered for kindergarden it is a outrage and I have falled in the trap myself with trying to teach my 2 year old almost 3 year old everything I can as fast as I can I just hope its not to late for them.

This article hits home for me. I have a second grade boy who is an intelligent child and struggles daily with the pressures of school and is fallling behind (one year behind) I have cried many nights because I am at a loss of what to do for him and worried about the challenges that we face.

By the way I do feed my children healthy meals, make sure they have plenty of sleep and read with them every night. When kindergarden child come home with homework, come on.......

We are destroying our children............

As a parent that has been a thorn in the side of our local school district - and yes, I have all boys in the system - I'm curious at what point the schools are going to have to start HEARING what all these articles/researches on adolescent boys' is saying. They simply turn a blind eye and deaf ear. Boys will be boys - they are WAY DIFFERENT than girls - they are much higher in energy - they do not work well sitting quietly, they need the hustle and bustle of moving about. I'm not saying there's not a time and place for them to have to be quiet etc, I'm saying that it appears that that is the only time and place left. There is no "activity time" for them. I just had this conversation with my son the other night (he's an 8th grade student and high energy - NOT ADHD, big difference). While reviewing his daily schedule, I asked him when "break" was. He just looked at me and said "we don't have break". Instead, he has full regimine academic classes and then at the end of the day, has PE - now I'm no genius, but even I can figure that kids need to get their energies out in order to be able to concentrate more efficiently. When I questioned his school about "what is your elective options" I was told that they have "Enrichment Class". Whatever that may be, which turns out to be yet another academic study, I commented "what about shop, home ec, those types of classes" and not to my surprise was told "oh, we don't have those". I have gone before the school board, have met with Supertintendants, have sent article after article to the Board and Sup's office to no avail. As I have told them in the past, they are now helping to shape my son for the future, they are merely creating test takers. While I admit, that there are still those teachers out there who understand/believe how the
system best benefits kids, the powers that be nowadays are so concerned with their daily perdiem that the best interest of these kids is falling entirely too far by the wayside.

Playhard got it right!!! If everyone would stop worrying about being pc, and start recognizing that there are differences between boys and girls. Accept that those differences are OK!!! Also how about parents take the time to COOK wholesome nutritional meals for their children and stop feeding them All this fast food highly processed junk. I promise just doing that will make a huge difference!!

NO, GENTLE LIBERALS, THE ANSWER IS NOT YET MORE "TAX MONEY FOR MENTAL HEALTH PROGRAMS" AND THE EVIL IS NOT [GEORGE W. BUSH'S] "STANDARDIZED TESTING." THE TRUTH IS THAT FOR FAR TOO LONG YOU AND YOUR MEDIA ENABLERS HAVE GLEEFULLY TAKEN IT UPON YOURSELVES TO "RIGHT EARLIER WRONGS"--THE ABUSES COMMITTED BY A PORTION OF MEN AGAINST WOMEN--BY SPENDING YOUR EVERY WAKING HOUR POUNDING ALL MEN (NO, MORE SPECIFICALLY, WHITE CHRISTIAN U.S. MEN) INTO THE GROUND WITH EVERY BIT OF MEDIA AND SCHOOL-BASED COMMUNICATION. I'VE NEVER BEEN A RICH WHITE BUSINESS SNOB--AND MY CAREER IS IN RUINS BECAUSE OF THOSE VERY SNOBS--BUT BECAUSE I'M WHITE, MALE AND TRYING TO COMPETE IN BUSINESS YOU HATE ME AND PUT ME DOWN AT EVERY TURN. LIKEWISE, YOU'VE BEEN POUNDING THESE BOYS DOWN SO HARD FOR SO LONG THAT THEY'RE FINALLY JUST GIVING UP AND THE SPECIES IS EVOLVING TOWARD YOUR DREAM WORLD OF, BY AND FOR WOMEN, WITH HILLARY CLINTON AND ROSIE O'DONNELL IN CHARGE. NOW, WHILE YOU'RE BUSY FORMING YOUR OWN STEREOTYPES ABOUT ME, LET ME EDUCATE YOU A BIT FURTHER: I AM ABSOLUTELY BLISTERINGLY ANTI-MALE VIOLENCE. IF I COULD ROUND UP EVERY SINGLE MAN WHO HAS EVER BEATEN OR EVEN THREATENED A WOMAN I WOULD BLOW THEM ALL TO HELL WITH A GATLING GUN. I WOULD NOT STOP SHOOTING FOR 18 MONTHS STRAIGHT IF THAT'S WHAT IT TOOK TO GET RID OF EVERY LAST ONE OF THEM. AND I WOULD PROUDLY STAND BEFORE GOD AND ASK HIS OR HER FORGIVENESS FOR HAVING RID HIS OR HER EARTH OF THE BEATERS/ABUSERS. BUT BECAUSE SOME GUTLESS F's HAVE ABUSED WOMEN IS NOT EXCUSE FOR YOU TO TRY TO DESTROY THE ENTIRE WHITE MAILE U.S. POPULATION. YOUR OWN STUDIES (AS CITED IN THIS STORY) SHOW THAT WE ARE ALL REAPING THE BITTER HARVEST. WILL YOU STOP? OR WILL YOU CONTINUE CONGRATULATING YOURSELVES ON IMPOSING "EQUALITY" THAT IS NOT TRUE EQUALITY AT ALL?

As a senior in high school, I look back at these children in middle and grade school and I see that they behave totally different then say my fellow classmates and I acted. Schools are just cutting to deep and putting kids through things they shouldn't learn until they at least experience being a child. Schools think that everyone is meant to go to college and you can do anything you set your mind to. From my expeirence, this is completely false.

Lets see, no dodgeball, not tag, no sports, no winners. Dumbass politicians and politically correct teachers not letting boys be boys. Nah that cannot be it.....

I think a lot of the problem actually isn't the boys, it's the parents. Parents aren't letting their boys be boys. Nowadays, everyone is expected to be politically correct little drone colleg prep student with a full schedule of ridgedly sturctured activities. We are basically emasculating our boys from the outset. Plus the boom in behavioral and psychological medicine and "studies" over the last 10 years or so has lead a lot of people to see "problems" where they don't really exist.

As a mom of two boys, I struggle when their behavior & temperment is compared to the sweet docile girl sitting next to them. I also get annoyed when it's suggested that boys in general have attention span issues and need medication. Some might, but the majority probably just need to run and play a bit more and/or have an opportunity to be engaged in learning via tagging the lesson to a topic they are interested in. My eldest loves ocean animals... tag math, reading, and the like to that topic and he's all eyes & ears. Let's help boys be boys, and not hinder them by holding them to the typical temperment of the girl sitting next to them.

I was in the gifted program in my district because I was 'smarter' than most but that's not necessarily true, It's all about the way you think. That doesn't have much to do directly with the topic but I can say that I have seen a lot of dynamic in the school system from regular elementary school classes to the gifted classes, and the academic courses in high school to the easier 'applied' courses. And I can tell you that they are boosting what kids are learning ahead to way too young of an age. When I was in Grade 9 Geography (Academic course) They were teaching a kid that I was babysitting in grade 5 the exact same stuff! Things I had never learned until grade 9. They really need to try and stop making school shorter in years, longer through the day, and teach kids information at a more appropriate age. Give them their recess to take a breather, because as much as we look back and see how easy elementary school was, it really didn't seem easy back then did it? So imagine what kids are going through now.

You are not going to find a simple answer to this problem. If you want change then it starts with the adults who are molding these children. Yes, they are capable of a lot but, you must remember that they are still children they would rather play and have fun not understanding why it is more important to learn. Children require patience and a lot of attention that most adults don't want to give including teachers who have large classes and what their job to be easier. The best way to understand would be to walk in their shoes. try asking them about it work with your children not against them.