A Son Finds His Way

Dear Mr. Milroy,

I am a student at high school in the 10th grade. I have an assignment given by my English teacher to find an article that interest me and when found I have to write a letter to the editor or writer of the article. When I was looking for stories to reflect on I really didn???t find anything but when I read yours I was very interested in your life story. Although I don???t have a story related to yours in any way but I???ve always wondered how it would be if I could just do what ever I pleased for once. I could just imagine the crazy things I would do if I knew I wouldn???t have any consequences, my parents yelling at me or nagging me, or even worse to go to a juvenile facility. But in reality all those things would happen, however knowing all of this I still always wanted a taste of it. Now that I read your story I realized that, although I don???t have an adventures life but I should be happy for the things I do have. I have a great family that loves me and great friends that are always their for me. I just can???t imagine how I would feel not having these things, which are the most important thing in life. So I would like to thank you for making me realize what I had is the best thing any person could have. I wish you the best and God bless.

Sincerely

Chris K.

Dennis - I hope you remember me, I sold your mothers house. Well written and inspiring article. It makes me appreciate the normalacy I had growing up. I admire you for your resiliency and logicail thinking. I continue to stay in touch with your sister. Take care - Dave

It's good that you forgave your parents for sucking at parenting, and it's good that you take responsability for our life's choices, but I would think these two issues are very separate and apart from the issue at hand. No, you parents didn't make you jump trains and do bad things, but they certainly didn't do their part, and it is very brave of you to have forgiven then. I don't think they did "their very best" at anything but drinking. Not that I am bitter, or anything...good for you!

Well written and thoughful piece. Forgiveness does, indeed, catapult is into new places in our lives. Accepting the fact that we share responsibility for the directions our own lives take, realizing that though we were raised by parents who may not have always been perfect but who did their best, accepting that though raised by our parents we are, inevitably our own people and responsible for directing our own lives and making different, and hopefully better choices than those who raised us did, is a valuable piece of knowledge we should carry with us always. The incription was as complete and humble a one anyone could have come up with. God bless.

Dennis, I have NEVER commented on an article (online for that matter) until now and want to say that reading your article brought tears to my eyes. Let me share....For 1, I grew up without a Dad due to alcohol. 2, Even though my Mom had all the love in the world for me I grew up with no discipline. 3, I too quit school in the 9th grade (after repeating 2 times). 4, I too joined the military (ARMY) knowing that it was going to be jail (eventually). 5, I too did so many terrible things as a 14-15 year old and somehow, someway just never got caught.....I had blamed my DAD mostly but to be honest had blamed both my parents for my ???world??? at the time. Which brings us to the ???now???. I own a very successful business in southern California, 2 homes (one in the mountains), have a beautiful girlfriend and three YORKIES! LIFE IS WHAT YOU CREATE! I just want to say thank you for sharing ??? it really hit home for me as my parents are both still alive. I think I???ll give them a call today??????.

Dennis, I have NEVER commented on an article (online for that matter) until now and want to say that reading your article brought tears to my eyes. Let me share....For 1, I grew up without a Dad due to alcohol. 2, Even though my Mom had all the love in the world for me I grew up with no discipline. 3, I too quit school in the 9th grade (after repeating 2 times). 4, I too joined the military (ARMY) knowing that it was going to be jail (eventually). 5, I too did so many terrible things as a 14-15 year old and somehow, someway just never got caught.....I had blamed my DAD mostly but to be honest had blamed both my parents for my ???world??? at the time. Which brings us to the ???now???. I own a very successful business in southern California, 2 homes (one in the mountains), have a beautiful girlfriend and three YORKIES! LIFE IS WHAT YOU CREATE! I just want to say thank you for sharing ??? it really hit home for me as my parents are both still alive. I think I???ll give them a call today??????.

Dear Mr. Milroy,

Thank you so much for sharing your experience, strength and hope around your recovery process, how you have come to terms with your family dynamics and have found acceptance in your parents strengths and weaknesses.

I encountered your article just two days after reading my amends letter to my mother as she held my newborn daughter, and I am still in a place of awe and wonder of how the Steps work when I am humbled enough to work on myself rather than be consumed with my perception of other people's character defects.

Your story is one of metamorphosis and hope that I will treasure and pass along to others on the path.

I am planning on reading my amends letter to my father this next weekend and tearing down more walls that I have built up throughout my life. My parents, like yours, did their very best and I love them for it.

God bless,

Erik B.
Seattle, WA

Thank you for sharing your story. I think the most important moment for any adult, is the point at which we realize our parents were only human, with all the failings and positives of any human being. And we must accept them for who they were, and create who we will become. Continued happiness to you, and peace abundant.