The Good Book and Gay Marriage

Wylie-Kellerman: I guess the last thing to say is that I don't know the judgment of God. None of us do. So say the Scriptures in various places. But I do trust myself to that judgment, knowing I'll be surprised on the last day at the truth of my life. We've been asked where things seem to be headed. I'm coming to wonder if ten years from now we might still be in conversation. Though our answers may get shorter.

I do believe that before ten years is up gay marriage will be an accepted reality in society, and in many, but not all, churches. We may see the further separation of civil unions from the marital sacrament or worship. I suspect that in many churches there will be services of repentance and reconciliation, just as we have seen in relation to slavery and racism in recent years. I am virtually certain that will happen in United Methodism. I think the Holy Spirit is on the move.

I think ultimately the inclusion of gay and lesbian folks will strengthen the institution of marriage, though it may first be weakened. There are many enduring, and faithful gay partnerships—-sometimes closeted, generally under pressures from family church and society, often without pastoral care or community support. They are an amazing witness of live. However, there are many other relationships that suffer break-up and breakdown for these very assaults. Relational fidelity in the culture would be greatly enhanced and increased by including lesbians and gay men in marriage. It would strengthen the institution.

Secondly, I believe that heterosexual couples of faith and conscience are more and more questioning their own participation in an institution that excludes so many. To be honest, that is true for me. As a pastor, I'm in premarital preparations with a couple right now and I find myself having questions about what it means to preside in a ceremony denied others. We're talking about that in counseling. Even more personally, my wife Jeanie has crossed over to God. Now three years since, I find myself open and hungry for new partnership. However, and this is very difficult to say or imagine precisely what it would look like, I don't believe I can, in good conscience, personally partake the institutional privileges of marriage while they are denied to gay and lesbian people. In the interim, there may be a small movement of nonviolent heterosexual resistance, as it were.

Ultimately, however, the inclusion will strengthen marriage. Marriage will change, as it has repeatedly during and since the biblical era. I believe this and welcome it. Pray for the day.

Duke: I think we've had a very good exchange. Thanks for being open with me, and letting me understand your thinking. I hope I have adequately communicated why I take the position I do on the issue of homosexuality and same-sex marriage. I think God has spoken on this issue and we know what His judgment will be. I know that I am not perfect, that's for sure. I am sure I'll have plenty to answer for myself. While I continue to work on myself, I will try to help others know God's standards and expectations so they can avoid as much of his judgment as possible as well.