In my dreams, Roma will always throw me an apple, but now I know it is only a dream.
Author Herman Rosenblat, whose Holocaust memoir was canceled by Berkley Books after he admitted to fabricating the origins of the book's central love story
Have you ever heard of anyone being killed by a shoe?
Dhiaa al-Saadi, lawyer for Muntazer al-Zaidi, the Iraqi journalist who threw his shoes at President Bush, arguing that al-Zaidi should face the lighter charge of insulting a visiting head of state, which comes with a maximum two-year jail sentence, rather than assault against a foreign head of state, which could result in 15 years
My understanding is that he is leaving show business to pursue a career as a thermometer.
Playwright David Mamet, on actor Jeremy Piven, who blamed his abrupt departure from a Broadway revival of "Speed-the-Plow" on mercury poisoning
I've never heard of a consumer electronic device fail[ing] en masse like this.
Research analyst Matt Rosoff, on a software glitch that caused a temporary, worldwide meltdown of all Microsoft Zune 30 digital music players on New Year's Eve
I'll tattoo your name on my ass.
Former basketball player Charles Barkley, pleading with a Scottsdale, Ariz., police officer to let him off the hook after he was pulled over on suspicion of driving while intoxicated
I consider myself a casualty, one of the many casualties of the war on terror.
Former attorney general Alberto Gonzales, announcing that he is writing a memoir about his tenure in the Bush administration
We used to fight about who gets to keep the house. Now we fight about who gets stuck with the dead cow.
Matrimonial lawyer Gary Nickelson, explaining the effect of the economic recession on divorce settlements
There is a 55–45 percent chance right now that disintegration will occur.
Igor Panarin, dean of the Russian Foreign Ministry's diplomat academy, predicting the demise of the United States by 2010
It pounds in everybody's conscience every day. Fifty years is something very hard to accept.
Cuban pro-Democracy activist Ramón Saúl Sánchez, on the 50th anniversary of the Cuban revolution