WOMEN’S HEALTH

Have Another ‘Fertilitini’

A slick new promotional campaign reminds women in their 20s and 30s that their biological clocks are ticking.

By Claudia Kalb | NEWSWEEK
Published Jan 27, 2009

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  • Posted By: Arizona Reader @ 08/16/2009 3:20:04 AM

    As a 47 year old professional women without children, I wish that I had had more information on fertility when I was younger. Like many of the women posting comments here, I balked & bristled when friends or relatives mentioned the ticking clock. I was also working hard on my career and thought that I would have "plenty of time for babies - later." Instead, I wish that my health care professionals had been more proactive and that I had not been so naive about how my reproductive system was becoming "less productive" with each passing year. I was mislead by media stories on all of the celebrities and other women who did not seem to have any trouble getting pregnant, when they finally chose to do so. Naive, naive, naive. And perhaps also slightly embarassed that I was NOT getting pregnant. So, I think that this program is great. Wish it had been around when I was younger . . .

  • Posted By: Timezeeb @ 03/17/2009 8:30:34 PM

    I'm a married 40 year old woman. I have no kids. I still get people looking at me wondering why I don't when they find out I'm married. Many assume its do to being unable to. I don't know. I have never wanted any yet. If I have them I do if I don't I don't its my choice. My brother and his wife have a lovely 3 yr old girl and are expecting child number 2. Kids need people who want them for the right reasons. When you want something you'll move heaven and earth to get it. Be it adopting or IVF treatments. There is nothing wrong with it. A woman should beable to choose when she has a child and if she needs a little help she should be able to get it. When you love a child, that being is your whole world and not to be able to have that child in your life because you can't conceive is a pain I would wish on no one.

  • Posted By: Libricrat @ 01/30/2009 11:43:41 AM

    This article scares me for many reasons but, mostly because overpopulation is THE single underlying root cause behind a vast majority of our global problems (polution, enemployment, lack of food and fighting that comes from competition of resources.) Fertility drugs and treatments should be illegal. People need to be restricted to having no more than two natural born children and the adoption process needs to be streamlined. Then take all of the resources being put into making fertilty and E.D. drugs and come up with a pill or an implant or a new form of contraception for men. With modern medicine, we no longer have to fear extinction. Infact, if anyting kills out the human race it will be global war over recources. If we cannot accept that hummans must manage their own populations our following generations will only see tougher and tougher times. It's time we concentrated the quality of life not quantity.

    • Posted By: eleyet @ 03/03/2009 7:24:21 PM

      You are liberal ass!!!!!! I don't know how you get the logic that they should make fertility treatments illegal. But, it is crazy. I have been married for 6 years and have no children. I have been going through fertility treatments, because it is my only shot at having a child of my own! You have no idea what you are even saying. Think of it this way, if you had no children and that is the thing that you wanted most in life, what would you do? Adoption is great but, you have to "buy" a child for around $30,000. And, don't say that we are paying that for infertility treatments and could use that money for adoption. Because our insurance pays for it. Maybe you should think really hard (don't hurt yourself) before you post a stupid comment again. There are people out there like me, who need these treatments, and are not doing it to have octuplets, but just to have 1. And, this is the only way that we can accomplish it.

    • Posted By: eleyet @ 03/03/2009 7:17:43 PM

      You are an ass!! I have been married 6 years and have no children. I am taking fertility drugs, because of a number of medical reasons for why I can not get PG on my own. And, you say that fertility treatments should be illegal. Most of us, don't do fertility meds just so we can have multiple children at once like some dumb people. So, maybe you should rethink your stupid comment. I do think that they should have limitations on fertiltiy treatments, but, they still need to be available to people like me who can not have kids on my own. Adoption is great, but, you have to "buy" a child for around $30,000 all up front. If it wasn't so expensive more people would be able to afford it. And, don't say that you can afford fertility meds and not adoption. Because, our insurance pays for it!

    • Posted By: Libricrat @ 01/30/2009 12:03:18 PM

      Oops. Maybe I should have proof read that one.

  • Posted By: katherineash54 @ 01/28/2009 12:59:48 PM

    its sad. america will end up like china if we dont put a plug on having babies.

    • Posted By: Rhino22 @ 01/31/2009 1:36:09 AM

      Are you retarded? China DOES put "the plug" on having babies.

      Why don't we just become communists as well?? Some people cease to amaze me with their stupidity

  • Posted By: MeaJo @ 01/28/2009 12:11:54 PM

    As a 26 year old, a woman, and a professional I am more than a little horrified by this article AND some of the resulting comments here. Why is it assumed that we WANT to have children, anyway? What I got from this article, is that instead of going to college and establishing my career, I should have been trawling for a baby daddy before my biological clock ticks out. In this day and age where there are SO many children in need of good homes, I really don't see infertility as a barrier to being a parent- adoption is ALWAYS an option and don't even bother spouting the red-tape line. As an educator in the inner-city, I teach a lot of children who are in need of good, loving, stable homes. I think it is the height of selfishness for someone to say they only want to have "natural" children or there is no need for them to adopt when they can just do fertility treatments.

    As for the race issue, what?? What in the world does that have to do with ANYTHING in the article? White women shouldn't be having children anyway? Without the importing of minorities the criminal justice system would collapse?? Wow. Sounds like some people have some major axes to grind. The bottom line is, the campaign is not telling women anything new. It's just giving new fodder to elderly relatives to point to when they ask when you're going to "settle down" and have "some beautiful babies". Spare me.

    • Posted By: summer4077 @ 01/29/2009 4:13:33 PM

      From another 26 year old childless, professional woman--amen! Couldn't agree with you more. I chose to complete my MBA, pay my student loans, and get a house...very successful by most definitions. Yet constantly I'm hounded by my boss (a man) and my stay-at-home-mom friends as to when I'm going to have a child. I will, just not right now! As if putting myself through grad school, landing a great job, and being a good person isn't enough??? Jeez...

  • Posted By: sacchrainkiss @ 01/29/2009 1:35:33 PM

    Just to throw in my two cents, I got married at 19, and had my first child at 20. Now raise your hand if you think I'm a minority.....
    WRONG, so it's not "just the minorities", and by the way, I CHOSE to have a child, it was not an accident. And now, I'm back in school to major in history and education. I would still like to have more children, but it doesn't seem so urgent now. And my daughter is loved and healthy and even if we can't give her EVERY shiny new toy, she will never, ever feel neglected or unwanted, which is more than I can say for some of the children of "well-off" parents.

  • Posted By: CouldCareLessAnymore @ 01/29/2009 11:08:12 AM

    We don`t need over 90% of you reproducing anyways... Funny that you need a license to drive a car but not one to spit out as many burdens on society as you please...

  • Posted By: awaken13 @ 01/27/2009 9:36:03 PM

    Gosh, fertility is a really pressing INDUSTRY--oops I mean, ISSUE in these prosperous times of plenty for all--why shouldn't doctors continue to live well, regardless of millions without jobs and/or health insurance? Children now represent the largest growing segment of the homeless population in America, with more children on the streets now with and without family members than at any time in U.S. history since the Great Depression. A minimum of 1.35 million of them are homeless here in America in any given year. Besides, neither the planet nor the American workforce can continue to support an already over-burdened population. If you want children, adopt. If you can't conceive without supporting Your Favorite OB/GYN in the lifestyle to which she/he is entitled, then don't conceive. Litters of children are an abomination. Homeless children are a crime.

    • Posted By: snowblind01 @ 01/27/2009 11:40:53 PM

      Your phrase of if you want want children then adopt is ridiculous and disturbing. And this is coming from a couple trying to have children the natural way not adopting somebody elses. By the way we are hoping to eventually have a litter. Does this make us an abomination? By the way how many children have you adopted? Did you ever have children of your own? If so then you are a hypocrite.

      • Posted By: WorkingMom @ 01/29/2009 8:53:59 AM

        awaken13 also assumes that adopting is like visiting the local grocery store. It is an expensive and emotionally taxing process, often extending over a number of years, and not all couples have the money to pay the associated legal fees. A $50 course of Clomid is way cheaper than a $10,000 adoption. And thank God adoption is not an easy or quick process! They need to weed out the sexual predators and other child abusers first and foremost, although there have been some horrendous cases where these people have tricked everyone along the way and were allowed to adopt. (The Masha case comes to mind.)

        They also need to weed out the people who cannot deal with frustration and inconvenience, because there is plenty of that in child rearing. Most fertile couples have no idea what they are in for when they have a child, but adoptive parents have lots of time to really think of all the pros and cons while they are completing their background checks, home studies and so forth. Infertile people going through more complex procedures like IVF need to be able to deal with frustration and inconvenience, too; most of them will have unsuccessful cycles and incredible grief before becoming parents through IVF or adoption, or deciding to remain child-free in the end. Infertile couples who finally have children, through whatever means, are some of the most involved and cautious parents I know, almost to the point of being overprotective.

        If awaken13 had ever tried to adopt him/herself, he/she would realize there are *many* more couples looking to adopt than there are available children, even when a family has no objections to adopting an older child, or physically or mentally disabled child. There are long waiting lists for both domestic and foreign adoption. Plus, many programs will not allow parents who are older than 35 to adopt. China is still very liberal in their age limitations (in fact they want parents who are over 30) but they have begun to turn couples down due to such things as obesity, history of major surgery, or any illness that requires chronic medical treatment.

    • Posted By: WorkingMom @ 01/29/2009 8:52:42 AM

      awaken13 assumes that all those homeless children also lack families. In reality, the 1.35 million figure quoted here includes children living with their homeless parents; I am unable to find specific data on how many of these 1.35 million children are also "street children" abandoned by their families. It is a tragedy either way, and I agree that allowing children to live by themselves on the streets is criminal. But if I were homeless, I would not be giving my child up for adoption unless he was at risk of starving to death. I would think most homeless families would do whatever they can to keep their kids before considering giving them up. And social service agencies should do all they can to find extended family who can take these kids before putting them into foster care or an orphanage. So to imply that there are lots of adoptable kids on the streets is hurtful to both the childless couples who would be more than happy to adopt a homeless child--even an older child or special needs child--and also to the homeless families who are trying desperately to keep their families together.

      And why is it that only infertile people have this supposed moral imperative to adopt? Shouldn't fertile people also be trying their best to get orphaned kids into their homes?

  • Posted By: PalmBeach50 @ 01/29/2009 7:52:53 AM

    Anytime anyone feels they have to live up to someone elses idea of whats right, there is stress. I keep hearing woman talk about all these things theyre expected to do. Your expected to live within the law, apart from that, do whatever you like.
    If your offended by a reminder of a bio clock, your way to sencitive to what everyone else thinks. If it doesnt apply to you, if its not what your interested in, Im pretty sure no one is going to knock on your door if you ignore it.
    We live in a society where, no matter what you talk about, someones feelings gets hurt. Grow up America, were raising a society of sissys fueled by political correctness, and its dangerous for our strength.

  • Posted By: rioguy @ 01/28/2009 2:17:38 AM

    A whole article about women getting pregnant and hardly a mention of men. Amazing. Sounds like another fear campaign to me. Whatever happened to the; "If you take care of yourself you can still have babies at a later age" campaign? They might as well have the model standing there holding a dead rabbit. They've just about said; "better have kids now cause you're dying inside"!!

    • Posted By: WorkingMom @ 01/29/2009 7:51:49 AM

      There never was such a campaign. Age-related infertility has nothing to do with physical fitness or clean living. There are some lucky 45 year-old chain smokers with histories of STDs and drug/alcohol abuse who can conceive naturally. And there are some 30 year-old athletes with drug-free lifestyles, normal body weights, and no STD histories who are already infertile due to elevated FSH levels. Women who think they can just keep in shape and take some herbal supplements to preserve their fertility are sorely mistaken.

      Premature ovarian failure has much more to do with genetics; if early menopause runs in your family, you will likely lose your fertility at a younger age than most women. This article may seem like alarmism to you, but it is a message that many women need to hear before they run out of time.

    • Posted By: WorkingMom @ 01/29/2009 7:17:36 AM

      There ne

  • Posted By: wildechild66 @ 01/28/2009 7:07:30 PM

    This is a really tricky subject, and one I think Maron handles quite well. Nowadays, many women have been raised with the "you can do anything" mantra, and now we're trying to figure out how to do EVERYTHING. It can be so intimidating, especially when it feels like educational and career goals put you farther from marriage and children. Good job, NEWSWEEK, for opening up on a risky subject.

  • Posted By: katherineash54 @ 01/28/2009 12:58:54 PM

    it would be selfish and downright silly to try and have a child at this point in time. the economy is awful, the schools are in despair...and women are FINALLY doing things other than having babies and making dinner. Stop trying to keep us in the house, and let us do what we want, when we want.

    • Posted By: nimodahooligan @ 01/28/2009 4:43:25 PM

      no one is trying to keep you in the house, pretty sure you can vote, be a CEO of a billion dollar company, you could be president, you can do whatever you want...

      have you been in a closet for the last, ooo say, 50 years?

  • Posted By: bigbill60 @ 01/28/2009 7:41:30 AM

    You know, this really is a white woman's issue. We really don't needany more white babies. You white folks gave up on that years ago. We really ought to just continue with the white replacement policy of importing blacks and Mexicans to have kids to fill up America. Spending 5 figures to get some aging 30 something colelge-educated white woman IVF so she can have he one perfect child is really a waste. Let white women go sterile as they have been for the last two generations. It would be better if they remained sterile and worked as college-educated professionals to take care of the black and Mexican babies that are being born right now. Having gotten a wonderful (and massively subsidized!) education, white women really need to stay at work and pay the country back for its investment in their BAs, MAs and PhDs. Let htem stay sterile. America really doesn't need white babies anyway. America needs low-cost, high work-output babies, not more white aristocracy. We have to get our carbon production and consumption down to reasonable international (i.e. Chinese/Indian) levels to save the planet, and white babies are just too costly for the world to support -- they are too big a burden on the planet

    • Posted By: nimodahooligan @ 01/28/2009 4:39:53 PM

      wow....sooooooooooooo glad your not in any kind of position to make your opinions reality...

      go back to school, learn some history, drop the rascist crap, then shut up and deal. or get out. move to iran or china, those places would suit you much better.

  • Posted By: katherineash54 @ 01/28/2009 1:00:55 PM

    african american women and other minorities have ruined having children for american women. the welfare system is full of unwed mothers and wedlock children. lets not put even more pressure on our economy. go to work ladies, not to the delivery room.

    • Posted By: nimodahooligan @ 01/28/2009 4:35:36 PM

      yea, its not like all the hill billy, welfare living trailer trash chics had anything to do with it....

      way to make a rascist generalization...

      yup...its all them black folks fault, and them asians, and them indians, and them latinos, and them dang towel heads...

      ludicris...

  • Posted By: Melvie_Sue @ 01/28/2009 12:35:11 PM

    I don't believe this article assumed in any way that EVERY woman eventually wants to have children. These doctors probably see a significant number of women coming into their clinics that DO want to have children, that might have waited too long and weren't educated to know their options earlier on, and are walking out incredibly disappointed/frustrated, wishing they had known more. This is all about voluntary education - I don't know why knowing more/becoming aware if you CHOOSE to offends so many...If you don't want to go to these events then, well, don't.

  • Posted By: Tomica @ 01/28/2009 11:34:22 AM

    They need to have one of these for men. Most people assume that infertility is a womens only issue, but it is not. Men have fertility problems too and when they are the cause it is more costly and harder to fix.

    Also, on the whole black/white thing. Coming from a black woman, the black community just does not deal with the issue as if it will go away just because we don't talk about it, just like all other medical issues that face the black community.

  • Posted By: Tomica @ 01/28/2009 11:34:11 AM

    They need to have one of these for men. Most people assume that infertility is a womens only issue, but it is not. Men have fertility problems too and when they are the cause it is more costly and harder to fix.

    Also, on the whole black/white thing. Coming from a black woman, the black community just does not deal with the issue as if it will go away just because we don't talk about it, just like all other medical issues that face the black community.

  • Posted By: PalmBeach50 @ 01/28/2009 10:54:19 AM

    And as a side note...a working single mother can have student debt forgiven without answering one single financial question.
    So the impoverished thing, dont get it...nice try though.

  • Posted By: PalmBeach50 @ 01/28/2009 9:47:04 AM

    "Women today need to put themselves through college and then shoulder the bill for it. "
    Men dont? The fact is that there are far more gov't programs for mothers then any other segment of the population.
    "Then they have to fight for the same pay as their male counterparts."
    Women as a working group, miss 18% more workdays than men in the same age group. Enough said about that.
    Not real sure what your point is here, but the facts are that woman (pregnant, or not), have it far better is this society than any other segment. They are almost, "untouchable." Employers are afraid to dicipline them, let alone let one go.

    • Posted By: sikntired @ 01/28/2009 10:31:54 AM

      ...and why might they be missing that extra 18% of work, palmbeach?!? do any of the studies you look at explain that? ...likely because they are home with sick children who cannot stay in daycare when they are ill, as women, still, end up with the brundt of caring for children, with or without a partner. do some more research. ...and if you are still jealous about how women live after doing some more realistic research, i believe they make surgery for that.

      • Posted By: PalmBeach50 @ 01/28/2009 10:52:14 AM

        Yes, women care for the kids in many cases and that does explain it, and while thats happening, (since we are talking in generalities it seems), men are earning a living so they all can eat.
        Deadbeat fathers, tons of em. Mothers that had NO business winning a custody suit...tons of them too.
        Im sorry you dont like the way things are, you sound very bitter.
        And unfortunatly, there is no surgery for that.

    • Posted By: sikntired @ 01/28/2009 10:40:14 AM

      ...and, as a side note, the government programs are for single, impoverished parents...which would also apply to single men raising their children, if and when that might happen more often...instead, you'll find most of the single men on the 'deadbeat fathers' list' for owing arrearages in child support. that, is the unspoken crime in all of it- penalties still aren't severe enough to shrink that list to nill. until that happens, men already are enjoying freedoms at a cost to society that mothers end up in jail for. ...there are no immaculate conceptions, so, for every single mother you speak of, there is an irresponsible father somewhere. let's not forget that.

  • Posted By: yankeemoved2iceland @ 01/28/2009 9:21:03 AM

    "an individual woman's fertility and the choices she makes about when and how to have children remain highly personal."

    Did anyone consider the "IF" in having children? IF a woman wants to have a baby? Why is it assumed that women can think about nothing other than babies? I have to agree with the 28 year old quoted in this story that this almost seems like more propaganda to panic women into having kids. It's no surprise that women HAVE to put off having kids nowadays. Women today need to put themselves through college and then shoulder the bill for it. Then they have to fight for the same pay as their male counterparts. Then there's the housing issue--even with prices crashing, how many young family-oriented couples can afford a house? The economy is not kind to working mothers and then there is health care and college costs to think about. Can you afford kids? This is something you MUST think about before jumping on the fertility bandwagon! Please, America, fix the situation for mothers and families before shaming them into having kids they cannot support!

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