‘You Do What You Have To Do’

There had to be days when it was too much.
Tartikoff: Of course. I remember the year that most of Calla's friends turned 16 and had birthday parties. [Calla is now 24.] Those days were tough, because so many mothers get excited when their kids begin applying and getting accepted at Yale or Harvard. For me as a mother, the day my daughter was able to lift her head up and hold it for several minutes at a time was my great day. I don't know if many mothers can understand how the little things bring joy when you face what we've faced.

Robinson Peete: Amen. The day Rodney said his first complete sentence was just so incredible for me, and it sounds like nothing to most moms. I didn't really come out and talk about my son's autism until this year, because I just couldn't. I had to get a handle on it myself before telling the world.

Do you keep trying to give back, or do you stop at some point for your own sanity?
Robinson Peete: For me there is no stopping, because now I have another journey with my son and it's really important that I get that story out there, particularly for African-American parents.

Tartikoff: I don't do the Fire and Ice Ball [a legendary Hollywood fund-raiser] anymore, but money and awareness are still being raised. I took time off to focus on my daughter and help her adjust to adulthood, and she's doing wonderfully. But as Holly said, you're always giving, and I do remember having to leave my kids when they were young to work on projects because one woman said, "Your work is going to save the next woman—maybe not me—but the next woman." That's a hard thing to walk away from.

© 2007