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By Newsweek Editors
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Hussain al-Jebori, an Iraqi expatriate who now owns a store in Dearborn, Mich., on casting a ballot in his country's first free election
"So now you're screwed. / It's a tsunami. / You'd better run... go find your mommy."
Lyrics from New York City's Hot 97 morning-radio-show parody of the tsunami that killed more than 220,000. The radio team, which drew protests from Asian and Muslim groups, was suspended indefinitely.
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"I had to look twice myself just to make sure it was there, that's how subtle it was."
Medical examiner J. B. Perdue, discovering that North Carolinian Larry Green, 29, declared dead by emergency medical technicians after being hit by a car, was actually still breathing
"It's got everything. Fame. Race. Homosexuality. A Peter Pan love story."
British paparazzo Jeff Rayner, explaining the media's interest in the upcoming Michael Jackson trial for child molestation. Jury selection begins this week in Santa Barbara County, Calif.
"Today, I call myself the miracle man because I didn't do anything to outwit the Nazis. There was no formula to survival."
Holocaust survivor Julian Mysels, 75, of New York City, at a 60th-anniversary ceremony marking the liberation of Auschwitz
"All our cabinet secretaries must realize that we will not be paying, you know, commentators to advance our agenda. Our agenda ought to be able to stand on its own two feet."
President George W. Bush, after it was revealed that administration members paid columnists to write articles supporting his policies
"Frankly, I can't get used to this face, and I don't think I ever will get used to it. But we are men and we don't make a big deal over our scars."
Viktor Yushchenko, newly inaugurated president of Ukraine, on living with a face disfigured by poison during his campaign
"If one homeless person can set a fire and disrupt the whole system... what can one determined terrorist do? It's a very scary thought."
New York State Assemblywoman Catherine Nolan, after a fire in a New York City subway relay room disrupted two train lines
"We are really looking at what we can do to find new revenue sources because we have a $1.8 billion shortfall." California state Sen. Jeanne Kohl-Welles, on her proposal to tax face-lifts "I feel like they're closer to home and we can have some nice long visits."
Mink, La., resident Alice Bolton, 83, on recently gaining the ability to talk to her children on the phone. The tiny town was one of the nation's last areas not to have phone lines.
"Let's face it, tolerating an Irish rock star is not a necessity of his office."
U2 frontman Bono, on an AIDS talk with President Bush, in which the president had to bang his fist on a desk to get a word in edgewise
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