Great points and all are vaild. There are times when professional help will prove to be helpful but it takes will on both parts to make that happen.
In Rebecca's case, as internet research and other sources kind of reveal, this is more a choice about "her" needs rather than the needs of others.
I was married to a woman with whom I had a child and I was unhappy. My view was that I would stay there for the child and make the best of it no matter what and mask that for the benefit of the child. I did not want my child to grow up in a broken home.
We decided to go to counseling when she revealed that she could not live with me because I worked too much and was career driven. I was willing to give that up (my career) for my child but she insisted on counseling.
We met with a counselor and she proceeded to go on and on about everything that was wrong with me. I then had my turn and at the end of the second meeting with the counselor, she said: "I think that your husband has valid points". My ex-wife informed me the next day that counseling would not work, she just wanted out. I asked her about our child and she stated: "I am only 35 and I have my whole life before me, I want to experience other men and I want a career, etc." None of these things were ever mentioned during our entire marraige.
I have lived apart from my child for nearly 14 years and she has definitely been scarred by this experience and it has definitely changed her life in many ways. My ex-wife thinks that assessment is silly. Her view of the entire situation is selfish and all about "her". Like Rebecca, she took a selfish approach and put her life above her children's.
Today I am married to a wonderful woman and we have two beautiful children. Our home is filled with love and hugs, etc. We have our disagreements and issues but we are MATURE enough to make sure that work things out and we have the same goals and an understanding that those children are more important than our egos and our personal desires and goals. Once you have children, you are responsible for other lives and to take things as lightly as Ms. Lavoie shows true selfishness.
I would agree with your physical abuse comment as well. I am sure that is not the case with Rebecca.
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