Newsmakers

Ready to Rumble

Last month NEWSWEEK was keen to interview Liza Minnelli. She was filming a guest spot on a Fox sitcom, and a Broadway musical about her ex-husband Peter Allen was set to open. Was this not a Liza moment? Her publicist said no, but confirmed our radarlike journalistic instinct: "Life's great for her these days."

And these days? Last week the gossip industry celebrated Christmas early when her husband, David Gest, sued her for domestic violence, accusing her of beating him five times in their 15-month marriage. Gest, whose court papers call him a "world renown" promoter, alleges that he now takes 11 painkillers a day. What would make it all better? Ten million dollars of Liza's money. Spousal abuse is no laughing matter, but even the most PC among us--imagining a vodka-powered Liza whacking Gest like a pinata--has to think, maybe just this once.

Minnelli filed for divorce the next day. In a statement, she called his accusations "hurtful and without merit"; she'd hoped "that the end of my marriage would be handled with mutual respect and dignity." (Neither party, you'll be surprised to hear, returned NEWSWEEK's messages.) But from the moment Minnelli and Gest tied the knot in March 2002, dignity's been in short supply; the best man was Michael Jackson. And we lost our journalistic objectivity when we read that Gest alleges Minnelli was not only alcoholic (really?) but "overweight." Isn't that hitting below the belt?

--Devin Gordon

Dustin Hoffman