Knocking Yourself Up

diyamittal, you don't think people need anyone to complete their lives? Then why do they "NEED" a baby? To experience being a mother? Sounds very selfish.

I'm a 30 year old, married, mom of three and I guess I'm old-fashioned. I still believe that children should be brought into a loving household with a mother and a father. I also believe that marriage is forever and only between a man and a woman. With my husband being in the military, I am a single mother a lot of the time, and I can't for the life of me understand why anyone would chose that lifestyle. It's hard enough being a working mother with a husband. I think it's selfish for woman to chose to have a baby without a father present just to fulfill their needs or b/c they hear their biological clock ticking. God made it impossible for man or woman to have a baby alone b/c he intended for them to be together to have children.

I have a wonderful boyfriend, have dated good guys and bad, and fully understand why any woman would want to have a baby with or without a man. It's natural instinc, and women only have so long to wait for "Mr. Right," whereas men can make babies till they day they die. After menopose, no more babies. I was a little girl raised by her father, no mother, and I turned out fine. I'm girly when I want, but if I have a son, guess what? I sure as hell will be playing sports with him and helping him build a tree house. We are past the era of "this is a man's job." And from some psycological studies I have looked through, it's not about having both parents...it's about the commitment of the parent(s) to raising a child well, and the love.

I just happened upone this blog and I don't want to seem judgmental in any way but I have to weight in. It is heart breaking to see a child that longs for a father. My little girl is 7 and her best friend has never had a father in her life, he left when she was very young. Several time she has commented on how lucky my daughter is to have a dad and how she wishing so much to have one of her own. This little girl is very loved, she has a grandfather and uncle that love her very much but somehow it does not fill the place of a father. A partner and companion for her mother is something that cannot be discounted. I am very lucky to have found a great man to be the father of my children. I was so pleasantly suprized at how great he is at the job. I beleive that prayer and thinking of our family first have helped us to make it through things that others might have let split them apart. I have to say that I am not surprised that a women contemplating this decission are not in a relationship because compromise and not being selfish is necessary for any good relationship to work and this is very selfish act. I know lots of women that have found themselves having to do it alone and have done it well out of necessity but to do it on purpose is not only selfish but cruel. If someone wants to be a parent, there are lots of kids out there that need a parent. Knoking yourself up because you want to expierience childbirth is selfish.

Suzette1973, these women are not selfish. How can you think that they are selfish? They want to give love to someone else. No, they probably are not STAY AT HOME with six kids soccer moms but they do have the power to love.........

God, I am so thankful I had both a loving mom and dad at home. I hated my dad growing up because I had boundaries and trust me, he enforced them. And, when my single parent friends where out screwing around and getting in trouble, I was at home. But, 20 years later, I am very thankful and love my dad more then ever, for everything he taught me about how to be a man. I always wonder, how much of this is the fault of the woman. Was she out getting it on with the unattainable pretty boy that left her after the eventually stand,, because so many woman want the same pretty boy or was it shewas just too obsessed with being a career woman. Either way, I can understand her desire to be a monther, but they never focus on why of her circumsatnace. Either way, I understand the point that a woman who has the means, that can afford the daycare or has parents that are willing to supervise the child, they would turn out to be good kids. But, the ones that leave the child stay at home un-supervised for hours after school before they arrive home, these kids are going to get in trouble. I've experienced it with my childhood firends. Thats why two parents in the home makes way more sense, because someone has to supervise a kid that don't know their boundaries. And, thats why a man is usually was more effective, they tend to be the enforcers whent eh child gets older and full of vinegar. JMO.

hello!

Philly...Id suggest online dating. Find someone that wants what you want, and get living already. I hate when I hear people say, "Im so unlucky in love". There are way too many dating sites out there, to be alone. And you can now pick out your potential perfect partner via internet. Id say stop going out with your single friends, who cant land a chick...and take what you got and get your own!

ALL THIS BOILS DOWN TO IS THAT A MAN CAN'T ACCEPT THE FACT THAT A WOMAN CAN RAISE HER CHILDREN JUST FINE ON HER OWN AND RAISE SMART WONDERFUL KIDS THAT ARE CREATIVE AND LOVING, UNLESS THAT MAN SAYS SHE CAN AFTER HE RUNS OFF WITH HIS SECRETARY WHICH IS ALSO HER FAULT BECAUSE SHE IS TOO BUSY TRYING TO RAISE HER KIDS AND NOT ABLE TO TAKE CARE OF HIS NEEDS JUST THE WAY HE WANTS HER TOO, GROW UP GUYS CAN'T HAVE IT BOTH WAYS.

I think so that you donot need anybody to complete your life .As in today's world you can't trust anybody and most of the time you fail to find a true love and that doesnot mean that you have to deprive yourself of the best experience of being a mother.So its better to go for artificial insemination and be happy .

God, I am so thankful I had both a loving mom and dad at home. I hated my dad growing up because I had boundaries and trust me, he enforced them. And, when my single parent friends where out screwing around and getting in trouble, I was at home. But, 20 years later, I am very thankful and love my dad more then ever, for everything he taught me about how to be a man. I always wonder, how much of this is the fault of the woman. Was she out getting it on with the unattainable pretty boy that left her after the eventually stand,, because so many woman want the same pretty boy or was it shewas just too obsessed with being a career woman. Either way, I can understand her desire to be a monther, but they never focus on why of her circumsatnace. Either way, I understand the point that a woman who has the means, that can afford the daycare or has parents that are willing to supervise the child, they would turn out to be good kids. But, the ones that leave the child stay at home un-supervised for hours after school before they arrive home, these kids are going to get in trouble. I've experienced it with my childhood firends. Thats why two parents in the home makes way more sense, because someone has to supervise a kid that don't know their boundaries. And, thats why a man is usually was more effective, they tend to be the enforcers whent eh child gets older and full of vinegar. JMO.

In today's society, marriage no longer holds the same connotation as it did 20 years ago. Today, in many marriages, women play the roles of both husband and wife. They still have to manage the household and do all of the work that is considered "wifely", but also help in supporting the household financially. In some cases, married women provide the main source of support for the family. So, in essence, marriage to a woman only means taking on one more person to take care of. I, personally, see no advantage for a woman in marriage. I raise a flag for those that decide they can have a family without a man. At least this way, children don't have to experience the trauma of divorce.

Male Reader

I am in my prime. In fact, I'm representing my state at Miss USA next year. I still have trouble finding quality men.

Just change the child support laws... If the man has no say in the outcome, only the woman, if he chooses to opt out, he should be allowed to. Also, it should be mandatory by law to do a DNA test for EVERY infant born to prove who the father is. The argument that he has to take responsibility for his actions are BS. The woman was there and she's the one who gets pregnant. Too bad we have so many politician's who are too cowardly to fix these un-fair laws. The women want bastards? They should pay for them.

Children should have a father and a mother married in a home!! God did not intend for us to intentionally rob a child of a male and female traditional home.

Spockman: Wow, so since there are thousands of "Unmarketable" women living in the world, I guess it is all over for them and should go commit suicide, eh? I am glad that your life is so great and that you live in "Perfectland". I wish you the best. Now hand those poor women a gun.

That's not true Suzette1973. I assure you that my child (if and when I decide to take that route) will have a home, proper care, and guess what, he'll even have a name.

And on Father's Day, these kids do what? Buy a tie for the turkey baster?

Just change the child support laws... If the man has no say in the outcome, only the woman, if he chooses to opt out, he should be allowed to. Also, it should be mandatory by law to do a DNA test for EVERY infant born to prove who the father is. The argument that he has to take responsibility for his actions are BS. The woman was there and she's the one who gets pregnant. Too bad we have so many politician's who are too cowardly to fix these un-fair laws. The women want bastards? They should pay for them.