Knocking Yourself Up

If this process is such a mistake as some of these posts have indicated, what do you call the children that are now alive as a result? In posting your comments, you should consider these children as well and give thought that one of them might be reading your hurtful comments. If you were not given life through this method, really you should keep your mouth shut.

The issue here supercedes the question. Whether or not someone can/cannot accompish something gives no credence to the issue "should this thing be done?" I have the capability of running up my credit card and bankrupting myself, should I do it? Probably not. Now, I do respect those on this blog who have gone through the trials of single parenthood, especially when there was no other options for them, but I completely disagree with the conclusion that this type of situation is (when preventable) a good path of action. I believe parenthood transcends the mechanical "culture soup" in which it is usually placed, and runs through a vein vital for a complete maturation of a child. A mother has distinct roles in this process, as does the father, and studies have proven this so, time and time again. Please, please, for the sake of your children, given them a solid foundation.

I am a father who barelly gets to see his daughter. The reason, out of nothing her mother decided that she wanted to raise her alone. Everytime that is my turn to see my daughter she makes things up just to avoid em from seeing her. When my 1 year old daughter is with me she sodes seems very happy and does seems to enjoy the time we spent together, to the fact that she resists to fall asleep during the time we are together. Children are meant to be raised by a family and not by a single parent. And I invite every women to reconsider their choice, is not about showing off that they may do it a alone. Is about at least give the sense to a child of a real family that sense can only be dlivered trough a real father, a real mother and real grandparents. It is being self centered when all you care about is about getting more money from child support and not caring about the valuable time a child can also spend with his father and the good effect it can result from that. I beg to all the woman that are or will become single mothers to rethink what they are doing.

If this process is such a mistake as some of these posts have indicated, what do you call the children that are now alive as a result? In posting your comments, you should consider these children as well and give thought that one of them might be reading your hurtful comments. If you were not given life through this method, really you should keep your mouth shut.

Wanting a child is only natural and if you cannot find that with a spouse I see nothing wrong with having children on your own. I feel that if a child is nurtured with positive thoughts, love, disipline and direction that they will be well rounded and balanced. I come from a home with two parents that were well educated. In our home there was a lot of tension, fighting and anger. It did not make for a secure home for a child. I believe when you grow into an adult you make your life what you want it to be. You as a person can change anything you put your mind to. I truly feel that woman or men can make a great parent on their own if they have the right tools and support behind them. Good luck to all the parents that teach their children to make rounded choices. Being kind, compasonite, considerate and loving will make the world a better place!Christine (childless not by choice)

As the product of a single parent housewhole I must say that this topic is a good one. I am 26 years old, I have no children, a college degree and a good job. People who are raised in single parent homes be they fathers or mothers that are around can turn out to be good upright citizens that pursue their dreams. I would love to have a family one day hopefully before I turn 30 but if I am unable to find the man of my dreams that will do this with me having the option to have a child byself should always be.

This article only helps the problem in society today - WOMEN. Granted the equality issue should have been dealt with a looooong time ago. As women have rushed to come into their own they forgot one thing. IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT THEM. To even consider bringing up a child from the start with only one parent is disgusting. It is so easy to say that the female half of the species is jacked in the head. The scary part is that there is some truth to it. Commitment, effort and tolerence is out the door. I'ts memememememe. I want a child, then do it right with 2 parents. If you can't deal with an adult male you sure the heck should'nt be having a kid.

This is another sure sign that america is about to go the way of the Roman Empire, the Aztecs, the Mayans, and all the other extinct societies. Women so jaded and man-hating they want a kid but never a man? Yep, we're done here. Oh well, at least some poor sap is not going to be paying 600 bucks a month for 18 years! I sure wouldnt want to be that screwed up baster kid though -

THREE CHEERS FOR TURKEY BASTERS!

I am a father who barelly gets to see his daughter. The reason, out of nothing her mother decided that she wanted to raise her alone. Everytime that is my turn to see my daughter she makes things up just to avoid em from seeing her. When my 1 year old daughter is with me she sodes seems very happy and does seems to enjoy the time we spent together, to the fact that she resists to fall asleep during the time we are together. Children are meant to be raised by a family and not by a single parent. And I invite every women to reconsider their choice, is not about showing off that they may do it a alone. Is about at least give the sense to a child of a real family that sense can only be dlivered trough a real father, a real mother and real grandparents. It is being self centered when all you care about is about getting more money from child support and not caring about the valuable time a child can also spend with his father and the good effect it can result from that. I beg to all the woman that are or will become single mothers to rethink what they are doing.

My father left my mother for another woman when I was 4 and she raised me with moral, values a hard work ethic and to respects other. In addition, she insisted I have a relastionship with my father - which I did - I went to live with him every summer of my life until I went to college. My half sisters who I love dearly - and had both my father and step-mother at home and very involved in their lives - one is a recovering heroin addict/alcholic, struggled for years until she was 28 and is now doing wonderfully. My other sister is an absolute mess at 30 and is a total narcissictic loser who dropped out of college and has been to jail numerous times. SO I COMPLETELY DISAGREE with the fact that people generalize and say children raised by single parents have the cards stacked against them and will turn out as losers. There was never a moment in my life where I did not feel completely loved and adored by my mother.

I think that giving birth to a loved baby is more important than having a father around. Growing up in a home of love and support from family is more important that how you got here. Pregnancy is such an incredible experience that a women should be able to enjoy.

I am disgusted, saddened, and understanding, all at once. I am a 27 year old African American woman. I posses a graduate degree and am surrounded by women of a similar ilk. Although I have no desire to be a mother or a wife, all of my friends (in their late 20s and early 30s) are already considering this route. No man is interested in us and it is not a matter of choice for most. We are not desired as women, so perhaps we can say that men envision a world without us. Whatever the case, I say do what is best for you. However, I had a great father and he was a single parent from the time I was 12 and I know the value he has given me. It makes me so sad.

I'm a single mother by choice and to this day all the guys I've dated have always cared more about themselves or no longer want children in their late 30's. Since I've always wanted a child and did not want a child by a man and have to tell the child that their father did not want anything to do with them. This way my son will always feel wanted since I would do anything for him to make his life complete.

American society is going down the tubes even faster than even Nostradamus could have predicted. This is another sign that our country is doomed to go the way of the Roman empire within 100 years or so. Women so jaded and man hating, they want a kid but never a man? We're done! Oh well at least some poor guy is not going to have to pay 600 bucks a month for 18 years!

I don't think it is selfish to want a child of your own, look at all the women out there that are raising children on their own, my mother was one of them, she raised me to be my own person. I have been thinking about being a single mother for sometime now. I have my own house, am financially independent, and older and wiser than I was, besides if I have any questions I have a big family who I can ask for help.

It cannot be true that women - who are eager, and committed, and well-adjusted, and making buckets of money - should be "allowed" to have kids if they "want" to. Biology was never about fairness or whatever self-fulfillment we think we may have earned ourselves. We are confused to think that a child is owed to us simply because we have decided to want one, and we are especially confused to think that science should give us one just because it can. By embracing that which will most tidily and conveniently satisfy our desires - a turkey baster, of all meaningless things - we divorce ourselves from the human experience and generate children who are equally isolated from themselves.

Um, why are we discussing this? 1 loving parent is better then alot of childern on this planet have it. Things that are wose: Living in poverty, living in a household with abuse towards a child or parent, living through a bad divorce, living near violent areas, living in a toxic environment, living in a crappy school district, being an AIDS orphan, having both parents laid off because their jobs are off shored to China and having to live through loosing a home. I am much more offended at those things then single moms or dads who really care and try.

scarlett32, I came from EXACTLY the same situation as you. My mom is a strong woman who instilled the values that made me a successfull and good man(not a good speller though). But not a day has gone by where I don't think about my dad and cry. It's hard not to do so now as I type this. My point is that WHY would someone willingly deprive a child of a father ?!?! espcially if they have a little boy,