Six Ways to Avoid Holiday Booze Blunders

I am so tired of AA arrogance and self rightousness . Anyone who is sober and who has not subjugated themselves to the archaic, moralistic authoritarian system of "recovery" is going to be offensive to those engaged in the fanatacism of AA and NA. . The term dry drunk is applied by your cult to anyone who has become sober and does not adhere to the tenants of yourr perceptual model. Your phenomenally low sucess rates at maintaining your sobriety is indicative of what a poor fit your paradigm is for most people. You have traded your addiction to substance to addiction to a group dynamic. Until you are able to face this amoral world by yourself, on your own without the use of substance or thedependancy on a group of other ex-users you will remain addicts.

I totally follow and agree with Drewhand there. I come from a family of origin where some members used booze to the detriment to others of us. There is such a thing as a dry drunk. The person who realised that the negative behaviors were causing trouble---but only stopped drinking. Even sober that sort of individual continues to be an ass to everyone. I hope everyone sees the way to acknowlege their own behaviors and become part of the solution not add to problems.

chuckie all I said is that if you are putting yourself in a sticky situation then yes it is your fault. You seem smart enough to understand that. I mentioned nothing about genetics in my post so you took this completely out of context.

Genetics NOT YOUR FAULT
Being a dumbass YOUR FAULT recovery or no recovery

and not once did I mention AA you did. I said meetings. But since you mention it you hit it on the head.
"paths to sobriety" or "path to recovery"

Recovery=changing thoughts actions and behaviors, helping others, selflessness, admitting and realizing the problem is yourself even if it is genetic.

Sobriety=exibiting the same old thoughts actions and behaviors as your were when tearing it up on drug/alcohol just not drinking.

And if you were truly an alcoholic of any caliber functional or non functional your thoughts actions and behaviors were grave to yourself and everyone you came into contact with on one level or another.

Point being big difference between "sobriety" and recovery.

Call it what you will but pointing out that a simple choice on who you surround yourself with demonstrating extremely selfish emotion is hardly accusatory.

I have no idea what your talking about with that practicality thing and society but please don't explain it. Or the primary effect thing either. And if my grammar is bad and you point that out my panties will not get bunched up.

. In my case it was my family 's drinking that was the root source of my addiction . I have been sober thirteen years have done so by the simple realization that I cannot ( and now do not want to ) ever drink again. It is wise to avoid events where alcohol is served. You are still being accusative and need to get over your self. Though practicality deems that alcohol remain legal, alcohols primary effect in society is harmful.There are many other paths to soberiety than the rigid authoritarianism of AA. Please have the the courtesy to not be judgemental of the feeling of others or set yourself up as judge of what is and what is not anothers fault.

I am a nondrinking alcoholic. While I almost always avoid situations where alcohol is served, if I find myself in a situation where alcohol is served I use this simple and direct answer: " I do not drink alcohol." It is nonjudgemental and gets my point across permanently without resorting to evasion or divulging overly personal information.

I don't understand why this is even an issue to be discussed.

I am a non-drinker. When I'm going to a party that I know will be littered with nothing but alcohol I simply bring my own drinks or simply ask for water (what a novel concept!)

Some of us simply don't enjoy the taste and/or the feeling of being buzzed or drunk. If you don't like at least one of those things you may as well not drink.

I understand that some folks have no idea how to go about a social situation without alcohol flowing freely, but those of us who can don't feel discriminated against for our non-drinking ways.

Besides, in my house there is always a desiginated driver. I just happen to be it.

I don't really understand why social drinking is such a hot topic.

I'm a non-drinker, (not because of alcoholism or a troubled past I just don't like the feeling of being drunk and don't enjoy the taste of alcohol. I decided long ago if you don't like at least one of those things you may as well not drink) and I never get any grief about it. It's not such a big deal. If I know there is going to be nothing but cocktails or wine I simply bring my own drink or just drink water (what a novel concept!).

This doesn't have to be a huge issue. I understand that most people have no idea of how to go about being social without a buzz, but it isn't the case for all of us and we function just fine at parties where there is drinking.

Sounds like Mechiefcat has had a few drinks already today.. Don't drink in post..

Happy Dave,
Human beings of all cultures have been consuming alcohol in social settings for centuries, and I don't see that ending anytime soon. And you pretty much answered your own question. Let me move some punctuation around:
"Why would any rational human being subject fellow-humans to a drink that becoulds and perverts the higher centers of the brain? In the name of having a good time." Exactly.

As for your second question, you pretty much answered your own question again. Let me just move some punctuation around:
"Why do we "moderns" actually believe that one would ever need alcohol? To enhance an evening of pleasurable social interaction." Exactly.

And your third question, well, any host that doesn't respect someones wishes not to drink is just a jerk. Not going to argue that one with you.

"Why do we "moderns" actually believe that one would ever need alcohol---a mind altering drug---to enhance an evening of pleasurable social interaction?"

Yes, we just invented alchol a few weeks ago. I thnk Al Gore invented it, after he was done with inventing the internet and global warming.

HUGE NEWS FLASH FOR YOU...People have been drinking for centuries. If they're doing so reesponsibly, then you need to shut your dry pie-hole and let them.

"Why do we "moderns" actually believe that one would ever need alcohol---a mind altering drug---to enhance an evening of pleasurable social interaction?"

I KNOW this will come as a HUGE shock to YOU, but people have been drinking for centuries, so don't make it a "modern" issue. Also, if people want to drink responsibly, they should be allowed to do so without putting up with though-police inforcers such as yourself. You don't like to drink? Great. Then don't. If you don't like it when others drink, build a bridge and get over it.

People by in large love to drink. Many people say they don't drink until they find out it's free. Most people use it to bring out their alter ego. Oh' yeah there are some who only have one or two drinks and don't get on my nerves but most drinkers don't care. Then they look at me (who has not had a drink in 14 years!) like there is something wrong with me. Booze can turn a nice time into a nightmare. It will never go away. Sorry to say.

why don't you just get some some friends and stop calling them a suppport group you ***?
i need some help! oh i need a cruch! it's not my fault! stand on your own two feet ! stop crying

Excellent idea - the alcathon. I'm a member of the online support group mentioned (My Way Out) and have found enormous support there. Many of us, frankly, are uncomfortable with face to face meetings, although a number of us participate in both. I'm happy to see more options now available. Thanks for the helpful tips, especially for those who may overlook the difficulty many of us face during the holidays.

Davidebert, you're a god!

Alcoholics Anonymous in most areas furnishes "alcathons" during the Christmas and New Years holidays, usually Christmas Eve and New Years eve, somtimes Christmas dinner as well. In our area, Cape Coral,Florida, there are four clubs which are doing this: round-the-clock AA meetings with free food and companionship for alcoholics. Some AA's will escape tense family situations for a couple of hours just to relax, and then go home and play "mein host" with a bigger smile. Try it in your area. Look up AA in the telephone book. It works!