Prohibition Redux

When asked if he smokes by Lady Bracknell in ""The Importance of Being Earnest,'' the suitor Algernon confesses that yes, he does smoke. Lady Bracknell approves, on the wonderfully absurd grounds that it is an excellent thing for a young man to have an occupation. That is a joke, if you like. What isn't so funny is the swelling army of those who seem to think that the word ""anti-smoker'' describe a full-time job. Would they, and the Therapist in Chief, agree to leave me in peace if I said I don't inhale?

HITCHENS is a columnist for Vanity Fair.

© 1997