1. Cleveland Rocks!
In a fortnight, the city on Lake Erie's south shore has claimed Johnny Football and the No. 1 overall NBA draft pick, and with yesterday's 13th-inning "balk-off" win against the Detroit Tigers and reigning A.L. Cy Young Award winner Max Scherzer, completed a three-game sweep of the team that entered the week with baseball's best record. But we're still not moving there.
2. Beating No. 35 by 35
Up by just three late in the second quarter, San Antonio goes on an 11-0 run as Kevin Durant takes a nap on defense—just ask Russell Westbrook—and puts the game on ice. The Spurs win 112-77 to go up 2-0 in the series, a margin of victory even bigger than San Antonio's women. Right, Chuck?
3. Moneyball 2: Coco Crispier!
Don't look now (okay, you may look), but the Oakland A's have baseball's best record (30-16) and its 25th-highest payroll. Last night Oakland beat Tampa Bay 3-2, its 11th win in 12 outings, despite getting just one hit. Is Brad Pitt up for a sequel?
4. Look... hockey!
The Los Angeles Kings, trailing 1-0 in their series with Chicago and 2-0 late in the second period, score six unanswered goals—Jeff Carter had a hat trick—to win 6-2 and even up their Stanley Cup semi-final series.
5. The Beat Goes On
Hapless Cub pitcher Jeff Samardzija pitches seven innings of four-hit shutout ball against the Yankees, only to watch his teammates blow a 2-0 lead in the ninth. He is utterly without hap: Samardzija now has baseball's lowest ERA (1.46) and is tied with a few for having its worst record (0-4).