Today in Tabs: Bridges of Bergen County

PogueYahoo
The Chris Christie saga continues, a radioactive sun cloud heads for Earth, and Cormac McCarthy's wife carries firearms in her private parts. It's Today in Tabs! REUTERS/Robert Galbraith

The Yahoo! tabs don't stop. After yesterday's post, Yahoo!'s David Pogue sat down for a hard-hitting interview with Yahoo!'s Nick D'Aloisio which included such tough questions as "YOU'RE THE YOUNGEST PERSON IN HISTORY TO GET VENTURE CAPITAL FUNDING!" What they curiously didn't talk about was who's giving all those stars to Yahoo! apps? Give up? It's Yahoo! employees! Yahoo! is the most ridiculous tech company of them all.

Another new Yahoo! employee is Katie Couric, who makes my skin crawl, but if you can stand to watch her, do watch Orange is the New Black's Laverne Cox tell her what she can do with her genitalia-obsessed questions abouttrans people.

Massachusetts man in jail for a Google+ friend request which is the correct response to a Google+ friend request, so well done Massachusetts criminal justice system.

NJ Governor Chris Christie's aides apparently shut down most of a bridge for political payback against Ft. Lee's Democratic mayor, which is the sort of thing tribal warlords would do, so it's right in line with Republican political philosophy. Remember, "I believe in small government" literally means "I don't really believe in rule of law or civil society." Oh also, someone may have actually died because emergency services were delayed. Christie held a marathon presser today where he attempted to throw his aides under the bus, but it didn't really work because the bus was stuck in traffic. (Paul Ford, ladies and gentlemen, big hand please. Thanks for the joke Paul.) There will surely be more tabs on this to come.

Novelist Cormac McCarthy's ex-wife was arrested for threatening a boyfriend during an argument about aliens with a gun she pulled from her vagina. I guess she carries the fire.

The sun just ejected a staggering mass of plasma and radiation from a sunspot group whose "primary core, all by itself, is large enough to swallow Earth three times over," and this radioactive cloud is now headed toward us at 1.6 million mph, so tonight, why not go outside and look up through our eggshell-thin layer of life-sustaining atmosphere and watch this savage miasma of death claw at the faint wisps of magnetic field that are all that stands betweenevery speck of life we've ever found in the universe and complete annihilationIt will apparently be pretty.

Further reading on the previous story might be enhanced with this Chrome extension.

Businessweek has a long feature about the boom in Bitcoin mining hardware, which unfortunately spends two pages repeating all the journalistic cliches about what bitcoin is, but oh well. Fantastic cover, anyway. Meanwhile Ghash.io has gotten pretty close to controlling 51% of network mining capacity which, if you need that in layman's terms, ha ha ha sorry I can't do that. But it's not great news for bitcoin. Anyway, this basically summarizes America right now.

Tablet holsters? No. Curved TVs? No.

Finally, the people who own all of the world's media are getting some media just for them.

Today In Men: BrocialismJust don't be a feminist, who needs youDick pics considered okA true gentleman always carries a spare dog with him.. Ok that was actually Today in Women, I tricked you because that's what men doYou shouldn't trust us ever.

Coachella lineup announcedChoire's not going though.

Dating today seems awesome as heck I really envy you singles. Even second graders understand how love works now. Martha Stewart slathers herself with "serums" and has the skin of a young child, unfortunately for the child.Drinking makes you popular. The Bronx cheer, the Manhattan, and now The Brooklyn beardPentametron is amazing today.

~How did I find tabs in Europe? With great difficulty.~

Today in Tabs is the thing you just finished reading, unless you scrolled directly to the bottom for some reason in which case it is the thing I encourage you to scroll back up and read right now. It may be experienced in email subscription form, or convenient, grab-n-go, a-la-carte form at Newsweek.com. It has email addresses and Twitter handles and bitmessage addresses and even a Patreon but I've already said too much, I can hear them outside righ

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