Advice for AIG Executives

It's Friday afternoon and there's little chance you're interested in another probing, insightful blog post, so how about a little satire from McSweeney's instead?

To: AIG Executives
From: AIG Corporate Security
Subject: Updated Security Notification

Due to a growing sense of public attention fueled by increased media scrutiny, AIG Corporate Security would like to highlight certain protective measures all employees can take in order to increase their overall safety and security. This memorandum is specifically tailored toward our top-level executives, and contains information unavailable to regular AIG employees.

  • Be mindful at all times of your surroundings, especially if you are surrounded by a large group of very angry people you do not recognize. These are taxpayers.
  • Be smart! In a "fight or flight" situation, it is almost always best to retreat. Do not take unnecessary risks. For many of you, this will be impossible.

Read the rest here.