Woman Slammed for Prioritizing New Grandkid Over Her Daughter's 2 Dogs
A woman has been criticized online for disregarding the longstanding agreement she had to look after her daughter's two dogs in favor of babysitting her newborn grandson.
Reddit user u/WhoToWatch01 outlined her situation to seek advice as her two daughters appear to have put her in the middle of a difficult decision. The mom explained that she has two daughters, one aged 28 who has a three-month-old son, and a 25-year-old daughter who has two dogs and often travels for work.
For the last three years, there has been an arrangement in place for the mom to look after her younger daughter's dogs whenever she's away. However, the arrangement is causing friction in the family as the mom now wants to babysit her new grandson and can't also look after the dogs at the same time.
While many grandparents look after their grandchildren, giving new parents peace of mind and saving them a fortune in childcare costs, it seems that there are other benefits of a grandparent being a caregiver, per a 2017 study.
The study, published in the journal Evolution and Human Behavior, found that those over the age of 70 who look after their grandkids had a substantially lower risk of mortality (37 percent) than those who didn't look after children.
If grandparents find themselves babysitting frequently, they might hope to feel the benefits of their generosity. However, it's important they don't over-assert themselves or take on too much.
CEO of Parents Anonymous, a non-profit program supporting parents, Lisa Pion-Berlin, told Newsweek that grandparents must learn their limits when helping the family.
"Parents are often faced with many challenges, even when trying to be supportive of all their adult children. Stick to what is important and what you are able to do," Pion-Berlin said.
"Caring for grandchildren may be a priority, but what is the ask, and can you physically and mentally handle this? If not, be open and honest with your kids."
In the viral Reddit post, u/WhoToWatch01 explained how her desire to babysit has upset her younger daughter with the dogs. The post reads: "My daughter with the three-month-old works full time and is going back to work as her maternity leave is ending. I work part time but offered to watch my grandson at my house while they are at work."
Before her eldest daughter would allow her mom to babysit, she drew up a "list of rules" for the arrangement to work. "One they stressed was no animals around the baby. That one was a bit of a surprise and conflicts with the needs of my other daughter," the user wrote.
As she can no longer look after the two dogs, who she describes as "rambunctious but otherwise behaved," user WhoToWatch01 has offered to check in on the dogs in the evenings when possible. Her 25-year-old daughter "flipped out" at the change of plans and said "it isn't fair" because she's got to find a new arrangement for her dogs which could cost a lot of money.
The Reddit post adds that the younger woman hasn't spoken to her mom or older sister for a week, leading the mom to question whether she herself is in the wrong. Since being shared on January 25, there are already 8,700 votes on the post and more than 5,000 comments.
Many of the commenters sympathize with the original poster and state that it was wrong of the two sisters to put their mom in this position. One comment, with over 6,000 upvotes, reads: "Baby daughter is manipulating you intentionally at the expense of dog daughter. You shouldn't allow this."
Although there is a variety of opinions in the comments section, some people feel it is justified to prioritize a baby over a dog, as the original poster has done.
One person commented: "Animals should not be around children, especially infants. Prioritizing a baby over some dogs that can spend the day home alone is the only choice here."
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