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The Borowitz Report: Giacomo's Scent

This year's Kentucky Derby winner, the 50-1 long shot known as Giacomo, made history again today by becoming the first winner of the storied race to launch his own celebrity fragrance, set to hit stores this Friday.

Accompanied by his publicist and a phalanx of marketing advisors, Giacomo unveiled the new fragrance, called Whoa by Giacomo, at New York City's legendary Bloomingdale's department store.

Giacomo's decision to launch a celebrity fragrance caught many in the perfume industry by surprise, since no horse-based scent has ever had mass-market success at the nation's cosmetic counters.

But Jesse Diblanco, who heads up the consumer products division of Team Giacomo, dismisses such nay-saying, claiming that Giacomo is an exception to the rule: "He's not a horse, he's a brand."

Within the racing industry, some observers are voicing their concern that Giacomo's sudden plunge into the world of celebrity culture may hurt his chances of winning the second leg of racing's Triple Crown, the Preakness.

In addition to launching his fragrance, Giacomo has been seen partying in recent days with such staples of the club circuit as Paris Hilton and white-hot teen starlet Lindsay Lohan.

Late Monday night, for example, reporters spotted Giacomo stumbling back to his stall, trailing empty bottles of Cristal champagne in his wake.

Racing insider Dobie Grossman worries that for Giacomo, the Derby success was a case of too much, too soon: "Remember, at the end of the day, he's only three years old."

Elsewhere, Angelina Jolie announced plans to break up the pending marriage between singer Elton John and longtime boyfriend David Furnish, telling reporters, "I like a challenge."