Bride Banning Twin Sister From Wedding Over Engagement Party Speech Praised

A woman who allegedly made a pass at her twin sister's fiancé during a speech at their engagement party and tried to "upstage" her sister by wearing a nearly identical dress to the event has been berated by users on Reddit, who praised the future bride for banning the sister from the wedding after her "outrageous" behavior.

According to a post shared by the 28-year-old bride-to-be (user aita_throwaway_twin) on Reddit's Am I the A**hole (AITA) forum, her identical twin sister (known as "M") has always had a "pathological need" to be "the 'better' twin at everything."

Things "came to a head" at her engagement party, where M allegedly turned up wearing "a dress almost exactly like mine but more glamorous," according to the original poster. "Unknown to me, my mother had told M what kind of outfit I was wearing."

Two women with arms crossed.
Two women glancing at each other from the side with their arms crossed. A woman whose twin sister allegedly made a move on her fiancé during an engagement party speech has been praised by Reddit users for banning her sister from her wedding. iStock/Getty Images Plus

The user tried to ignore the dress situation and "the night went well" until M gave a speech during which she claimed the future bride "always tried to be just like M."

M allegedly "made a dig" about not being a bridesmaid at her sister's wedding because the future bride "is probably worried I'd steal her thunder" and rounded the speech off by telling the sister's fiancé: "If you get tired of her, you know where I am."

The sister then pulled M into the hallway and "ripped" into her with some "harsh words." She called M a "psychotic jealous c**t" who wouldn't be "single, unemployed and still living at home" if M hadn't spent their entire lives "pretending to be me," before uninviting M from her wedding, as she didn't want a "pathetic waste of DNA" to be there.

The original poster said several family members, including her mother, have called her an "AH [a*****e]" for "embarrassing" her sister at a family party and for bringing up "sensitive" subjects such as her unemployment.

Several users on the forum came to the defense of the original poster, condemning the twin sister for her "unacceptable, disrespectful" behavior and "horrid little speech."

Many were especially appalled by M making a move on her sister's fiancé during the speech.

User ChapSteve711 wrote: "NTA [not the a*****e]. She literally made a move on your fiancé. Your family is blind if they do not understand what she's doing." The comment received 23,800 upvotes at the time of reporting.

User MerelyWhelmed1 wrote: "I'm stuck on how it's okay for M to say cruel (lies) things in her speech, and make a pass at the fiancée, but somehow bringing up M's failings is 'hurtful,'" in a comment that received 510 upvotes.

Many criticized the original poster's family, especially her mother, for "turning a blind-eye" and "enabling" M's actions.

User GlitterGaff wrote: "NTA and shame on your family for enabling her behavior all these years. Congrats on the wedding, go forth and live your best life, your sister can wallow in the misery of her own creation," in a comment that received 8,300 upvotes.

User Ok-Beginning-5922 wrote: "Your mother (maybe both parents) enable and facilitate her," claiming that M has "a history of trying to upstage" her sister.

The user suggested telling the mother to "think VERY carefully about her coddling and enabling of your sister" and that "they need to tell your sister her behavior is unacceptable, disrespectful, and it needs to stop."

The user said: "It's time to be blunt" and tell the mother that "turning a blind-eye to your sisters bullsh!t will not be tolerated," in a comment that received 1,100 upvotes.

Some users suggested uninviting other family members from the wedding. User rhet17 wrote: "Tell them if they don't understand the evil in her horrid little speech then they don't have to attend your wedding (or be a part of your life!).

"That was completely outrageous behavior by your sister and if everyone can't see the pattern there's something wrong," the user said in a comment that received 760 upvotes.

User Babylon-Starfury wrote: "This is a good time for OP [original poster] to tell the family to make a choice. Come to the wedding or stay home with the sister," in a comment that got 807 upvotes.

User ScorpionGem11 agreed, adding that any wedding guest who thinks the original poster is an AH should also "receive an invitation redaction in case someone decides to bring her as their plus 1 because OP [original poster] was just 'so mean,'" in a comment that received 1,800 upvotes.

According to a study published in May 2021 in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, "twin relationships have a significant effect on the twins' life and their families."

The study's findings suggested that "closeness and dependence decreased while rivalry increased through childhood" and "monozygotic [identical] twins had higher levels of closeness and dependence than dizygotic [fraternal] twins through childhood, but there was no significant difference in the levels of their conflict and rivalry."

The study also indicated that "parental positivity predicted the twins' closeness and dependence, and parental negativity predicted the twins' dependence, conflict and rivalry."

Newsweek has contacted aita_throwaway_twin for comment.

Has a wedding come between your relationship with a loved one? Let us know via We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.