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By Daniella Gray
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A dad of two is going viral for how he handled a conversation with his toddler son.
Jonathan David Denham (@jd_denham_fit) shared footage from his home Ring camera in a reel on Instagram after coming home to see his wife, Alyssa Denham, was visibly upset.
Their son, 4-year-old Jax, had been yelling, refusing to listen and being “disrespectful”, Denham told Newsweek.
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He didn’t witness the behavior firsthand, so he went into their son’s playroom where his wife had placed him to cool off.
To address the issue, the father spoke calmly to Jax and asked him why he was treating his mom like that.
Over time, Denham has learned that intensity doesn’t work for Jax. “He understands far more than most 4-year-olds and yelling at him and getting angry doesn’t work for him,” Denham said. “Slowing down, being calm, hugging him and then telling him what he did wrong and how he could fix it works far better.”
Denham talks to Jax about respect for his mom—and women in general—and reminds Jax that he can no longer speak to his own mother, who is no longer here.
“This approach was learned with some trial and error and learning his personality and what he responds to best,” Denham said. “He respects me, so I showed him I can be calm and let him know I don’t speak to his mother that way, and he will not be allowed to speak to her—or women—that way.”
Denham, who is also dad to 18-month-old Mason, said that his approach was not always his instinct.
“I have been sober for 15 years this January,” he explained. “I have learned through my sobriety, just to try and be a better person than I was the day before. I believe the father is the leader, foundation [and] refuge for his family to run to in times of uncertainty, fear or doubt. That means, when my children are upset, scared [or] angry, I need to be that place they feel safe.”
As a self-proclaimed work in progress, Denham shared that he doesn’t always rise to the moment.
“I am human and sometimes I can yell and get upset,” he said. “But I try to catch myself, and realize he’s 4, and will become what he sees."
His wife meanwhile took the opportunity to plead for an addition to their brood. She wrote in the comments: "Seeee babe!!!!!!! This is exactly why we need more babies!!!!!! You’re such an amazing dad - can all of jd’s followers please spam him with comments encouraging him to give me one more baby lol."
Denham’s reel has received over 100,000 likes and views. And followers praised him for his calm approach. Many were moved to tears by the interaction, leaving crying emojis in the comments.
“We need as many children as possible raised by fathers (and parents) just like this. Now more than ever,” one user wrote.
“The calm voice and teaching your boy to respect his mother will be such a huge life lesson as he gets older,” another added.
After their conversation, Jax went straight to his mom to apologize as instructed. “My wife tried to talk to him a little more, but I kind of gave her the eyes, like, he already gets it, just love on him,” Denham said. “It was a very raw and authentic moment of learning how to deal with his emotions, and learning how sorry can help make things better.”
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