'Excluded': Father Barred From Child's Delivery Room Leaves Internet Torn

Thousands of commenters were left feeling conflicted after one new father explained why he went home, instead of staying in the hospital for the birth of his son.

In a viral Reddit post published on r/AmITheA**hole, the 29-year-old man said that his wife had, what he believed to be, a "fairly standard pregnancy." However, when it was time for his wife to give birth, the couple reached an unforeseen crossroads. Titled, "AITA for going home when my wife didn't let me into the delivery room," the viral post has received more than 10,000 votes and 5,000 comments.

"The problem started when she was taken to the delivery room," the scorned father began. "She asked the nurse that only her mother and sister be allowed in the delivery room and then told me that she wanted me to wait until 'I've delivered and calmed down' before letting me into the room."

"I was kind of shocked and didn't want to make a scene so I just said OK and sat down in the waiting room," he added. "We had not really discussed the plan for the hospital and I had no reason to think I wouldn't be there when my son was born."

After spending multiple hours in the hospital's waiting room, the original poster said he elected to go home, and texted his wife's sister to tell his wife that he would meet his new son the following day.

"I sat in the waiting room for 6 hours getting minimal updates as the labor was fairly slow," he wrote. "I decided there was no point so I texted her sister that I was going home. I'd meet my son when they brought him home and handle the birth certificate stuff the next day."

"They came home...and I was finally able to meet my son," he continued. "When my wife's mother and sister left, she got very angry at me for leaving her at the hospital. I was angry too but I told her that we can talk about this in a few days because she's just given birth."

Man waiting in hospital waiting room
A new father explained to a popular Reddit forum why he decided to go home after being kept out of his wife's delivery room. ArtmannWitte/iStock / Getty Images Plus

"She wouldn't drop the subject so I finally told her that she excluded me from the birth of my son for no reason, I didn't see the need to hang around a hospital waiting room for hours doing nothing," he added.

In most cases, expecting couples are encouraged to draft an agreed-upon birth plan, to ensure that childbirth goes as smoothly as possible.

"Creating a birth plan ahead of time helps you make decisions about how you want your labor and delivery to be, and lets others know your wishes" the WebMD website reads.

Detailing everything from how bright the lights in the delivery room are, to pain medication preferences, birth plans are intended to assist couples, doctors and other support personnel to make quick decisions without adding any extra stress for expecting mothers.

They are also imperative in cases of unexpected labor, according to KidsHealth, an online resource for children's health information.

"Your doctor or health care provider may know...what you want and don't want," KidsHealth maintains. "But, if you go into labor when there's an on-call doctor who you don't know well, a well thought-out birth plan can help you communicate your goals and wishes to the people helping you with the labor and delivery."

In the viral Reddit post's top comment, which has received more than 15,500 votes, Redditor u/Sarioth blamed the couple's lack of a birth plan for the original poster being kept out of his wife's delivery room.

"Y'all just thought everything would go OK and didn't even think to like, make sure you were on the same page about a major medical procedure/bringing a person into the world?," they questioned.

Redditor u/Spotzie27, whose comment has received 2,200 votes, responded to the post with a similar inquiry.

"I feel like this can't be the full story," they commented. "You guys didn't talk about any of this until the day of?"

Not all commenters were so confused, however, and said the original poster's wife was "inconsiderate" for not allowing him in the delivery room for the birth of their son.

"If your wife didn't want you to be in the delivery room, that should have been discussed ahead of time," Redditor u/teresajs commented. "She essentially shut the door in your face and expects you to just have waited in the uncomfortable waiting room for 15 hours."

In a separate response, another Redditor said that both the original poster and his wife owe each other apologies.

"It was completely sh*tty of her to cut you out of that," they wrote. "At the same time, I feel like you shouldn't have left."

"This is a no win situation, where no one is in the right," the Redditor added. "Both sides deserve an apology."