Internet Backs Man for Encouraging Sister to Leave Husband, End Pregnancy in Viral Post

A man took to Reddit's "Am I The A**hole" forum for readers' thoughts on a recent predicament, involving his sister, her allegedly abusive husband, and their traditionally-minded extended family. The post has gone viral on the site since it was shared on Friday, amassing over 17,000 upvotes and 1,600 comments.

The incident described in the anonymous Redditor's post is not one to be taken lightly: according to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV), one in three women and one in four men "have experienced some form of physical violence by an intimate partner."

However, many of these cases go untreated and/or unreported: "Only 34 percent of people who are injured by intimate partners receive medical care for their injuries," noted the organization.

In his post, the 32-year-old man, known as u/aita112022, began by explaining some of the complex dynamics in his family. He has a sister, 34, and two older brothers, aged 38 and 40, respectively. "Note the age differences," he said.

"Our family was relatively modest when my brothers grew up, so they were cared for a lot by my parent's families who are very conservative," he explained. However, by the time he and his sister were born, his family was more financially independent—meaning that the younger two siblings were less influenced by the conservative family members.

Their father passed away about five years ago, in their hometown, described as a "suburban town in Wisconsin." After the funeral, the Redditor said he went "mostly [low-contact] with everyone except [his] sister."

In the subsequent years, the Redditor's sister reportedly left her career, moved back to their hometown, and, in 2019, ended up marrying "a churchgoer's kid" that their mom had set her up with several years prior. "I honestly was in shock at the wedding," he wrote. "I really didn't ever see my sister living on a farm and becoming a stay-at-home mom."

He suspected that his mom and brothers played a "huge" role in the sister's decision. "Later I found out that she had pretty much given all her savings to her husband," he said.

Things between the Redditor and his sister appeared fine until "early in 2021," when their mom called him and told him that his sister was pregnant. "I immediately asked my sister about this and she kinda broke down. In short, the husband has been abusive, she's broke and my family and her in-laws haven't helped," he explained.

"My oldest brother wailed at her about how his wife went through the same thing and my sister should stop thinking she's special," he added.

At that point, the Redditor also yelled at her—but he had a different message than that of his eldest brother. "I told her that she had a career [that] she can still go back to and I can help her move back to NYC," he wrote. He also told her "that the pregnancy wasn't the end of it and there were other options."

The following day, his sister reportedly asked him for $5,000, which he sent without asking any questions. After that, he "didn't hear much" from her for about a month.

"A month later my sister told me she had gotten a new job in NYC and filed for divorce," he wrote. "The pregnancy is also no longer on the table."

"Now my family has been blowing up my social media calling me all sorts of s**t," he concluded. "My sister needed to switch apartments and got a restraining order against her ex and well...things aren't great, but I'm happy my sister is better. So AITA?"

Despite the conflict that ensued, readers were quick to praise the Redditor's course of action. "Two words: Abusive husband," wrote u/cedarnotes in a highly-voted comment. "You did her a favor."

"You saved your sister's life and I'm so sorry that you have to deal with a family like that!" echoed u/LadyAnput.

"Abusers often use kids as a way of trapping women in dangerous marriages..and the child wouldn't have been safe either," added u/Diligent_Brick_5023.

Newsweek reached out to u/aita112022 for comment.

Reddit Logo
On Friday, a Redditor made waves for sharing the story of his sister's abusive marriage—and the role he played in helping her escape it. A photo illustration of the Reddit logo, 2021. Yuriko Nakao/Getty Images