Internet Backs Man for Not Spending $200 On Gift for Friend Who Claims to Feel 'Unloved'

A man got into an argument with a friend who was disappointed in how much he spent on her gift.

In his post on Reddit's "Am I the A**hole," u/mopresentsmoproblems wrote that his friend has taken a great interest in the five love languages. He wrote in his post that received more than 10,000 interactions that her specific love language is receiving gifts and expects those around her to put thought into what she receives.

An article with mindbodygreen described the five love languages as the different ways one can express and receive love. They include words of affirmation, quality time, gifts, acts of service and physical touch. The piece reported that Gary Chapman, Ph.D., developed the concept of love languages.

"I thought I put a good amount of thought into her gift," u/mopresentsmoproblems wrote in his post. "She likes this one brand of artisan coffee from a local shop, so I bought her a big bag of that coffee from the store and a nice mug to go with it. It cost about $45 in total."

When they exchanged presents, the Redditor noticed that his friend was disappointed after she opened her gift from him. He wrote that she asked how much he spent and said she expected a "nicer gift," that would have cost about $200.

"She said that my cheap gift meant that she felt unloved because receiving gifts is her love language," u/mopresentsmoproblems wrote.

He then said that he took her gift from her and left without opening his own gift. The two have not spoken in days.

While receiving gifts is a love language, the mindbodygreen piece noted that receiving gifts should not be about the monetary value behind the gesture.

"People with this style recognize and value the gift-giving process: the careful reflection, the deliberate choosing of the object to represent the relationship and the emotional benefits from receiving the present," the article states.

The top commenter, who received more than 20,000 votes, echoed the sentiment and stated that the Redditor's friend should have recognized the thoughtfulness behind his gift to her.

"She's just a materialistic a**hole," they wrote.

One commenter was surprised that the Redditor's friend asked about the price of the gift.

"Who puts a price expectation n the gifts they get? Who asks someone how much they spent on a gift?" the commenter wrote.

One wrote that while his friend may be "kind" in other instances, he should re-examine if she was showing true kindness, or if she was manipulating him.

"She gives off the vibe of 'I did all these nice things for my friends so I deserve nice gifts' so entitled," another stated. "I'm so happy he took the gift back."

"She's is literally using 'her love language' as a means of getting expensive gifts and then tries to manipulate you into feeling bad for not spending x amount of money," a comment read.