Internet Blasts Mother Who Had Infant Daughter's Ears Pierced Behind Husband's Back

One mother's decision to have her infant daughter's ears pierced made waves when she revealed that her husband, the baby's father, had no idea she was doing it.

In a viral thread posted on Reddit's r/AmITheA**hole, user u/MajorOverreaction9 asked the subreddit's 3.4 million members if she was wrong for going behind her husband's back to have her months-old baby's ears pierced. Receiving over 8,500 votes and 6,300 comments on the thread, the Redditor said that she and her husband discussed piercing their infant daughter's ears in the past, but said he "didn't like the idea," and that "he needed time to think about it."

But at the advice of her mother, u/MajorOverreaction9 went ahead and got her daughter's ears pierced anyways, with the hope that her husband would eventually realize that it was not a bad decision for their baby—but that's not how it worked out.

"Mom suggested we do it behind his back and he'll then come around and see for himself that it's a good thing," u/MajorOverreaction9 wrote. "When my husband got home and found out he lost his temper and went on about what a major breach of trust I just committed and how I should have never decided to do this without him."

According to the American Academy of Pediatrics website, baby ear piercing is safe, and can be performed at any age.

"Ears may be pierced for cosmetic reasons at any age," the website reads. "If the piercing is performed carefully and cared for conscientiously, there is little risk, no matter what the age of the child."

The American Academy of Pediatrics also recommends that parents, despite the safety of piercing procedures, "postpone the piercing until your child is mature enough to take care of the pierced site."

While many parents follow the guidance provided by the AAP, others are quicker to have their baby's ears pierced, and according to Fatherly, "baby ear piercing is a common practice across many cultures."

Baby ear piercing
One Redditor claims their husband felt 'betrayed' when she decided to have their baby's ears pierced behind his back. Viorel Poparcea/iStock / Getty Images Plus

However, u/MajorOverreaction9 made it clear that her decision to pierce her daughter's ears was not cultural, and defended the decision by saying that her opinion as a mother is more important than her husband's.

"It's not cultural we're both white but it's a great new experience," she wrote.

"I'm the mother and my opinion does have heavier weight than his to some degree," she added.

Concluding the thread by explaining that her husband had left their home and was staying with his mother, u/MajorOverreaction9 remained firm that piercing her daughter's ears was the correct decision, opening her up to a ton of criticism from other Redditors.

In the thread's top comment, receiving more than 30,000 votes itself, u/grandoledog said the original poster was wrong and that her husband was justifiably upset.

"[You're the a**hole]. I don't blame him for being angry," they commented. "You were definitely 'sneaky and untruthful' and then tried to blame your mom for it???"

Redditor u/km89 likened u/MajorOverreaction9's decision to decorating for the holidays, and echoed u/grandoledog's sentiment about making the decision without consulting her husband.

"It's a child, not a Christmas tree for you to decorate. And you explicitly went behind your husband's back for it, too," they wrote.

In a comment boasting 5.6K votes, u/CrystalQueen3000 delivered an additional blow to u/MajorOverreaction9, and like the majority of Redditors who responded to the viral thread, they defended her husband and said the original poster's words were as harmful as her decision to have her daughter's ears pierced.

"He's right," they wrote. "You've damaged the trust and asserted that you have more of a say in your daughter than he does, which is a f****d up and rude as h*ll thing to say."