Internet Sides With Woman Who Had 'Adulterer' Etched On Unfaithful Husband's Grave Stone

Reddit user u/One-Poetry9190 took to Reddit's "Am I the A**hole" forum earlier this week to discuss an ongoing feud within their family—and sparked a viral conversation in the process, racking up nearly 32,000 votes at the time of writing.

The post's central question revolves around whether or not a widow, separated from her husband at the time of his death, has the right to inscribe his gravestone with a "gravely insulting," albeit accurate, title: "Adulterer." The situation, while certainly comical on the surface, also highlights the complex nature and expression of grief, especially when the infidelity of a loved one is involved.

In their post, Redditor u/One-Poetry9190 explained that their "father and mother had a very bitter marriage towards the end of his life" because "he had a long running affair with another married co-worker and got her pregnant before he passed."

"He was planning to leave mom, skip the country and move to Canada to start a new life with her. They had a house picked out and all."

However, things became more complicated when their father passed away without warning, under unfortunate circumstances: "He suddenly died of a heart attack while having sex."

The Redditor goes on to explain that their parents were in the process of getting divorced when he died, but the official paperwork remained unfinished. "They were in the process of moving all things legal. But on paper, they were still happily married," they wrote.

After his death, u/One-Poetry9190's mom decided to take one last stand against her husband by making his betrayal abundantly clear. Explained the post: "My mom was hurt and petty and marked his gravestone as 'In loving memory of John Doe, son, husband, father and adulterer.'"

The cheating husband's family and still-pregnant partner, however, were not pleased by this choice—and reportedly want u/One-Poetry9190 to fix it. But, the Redditor hesitates to intervene.

"I personally think [it's] fine, that's who he was. He was all of those things. And since it's my mom's plot, I can't do anything."

While Newsweek has not been able to independently verify the claims made in the Reddit post, u/One-Poetry9190 explained that their mom had gotten the idea to engrave the headstone after seeing it done in a meme.

The post has garnered over 3,000 comments, the majority of which display overwhelming support for the widowed mom. Some commenters describe her as an "icon" and "MVP" for her gravestone message, while another asks: "Can she adopt me?"

Not everyone, however, was as enthusiastic about the "adulterer" carving. Wrote u/kinder74: "Yes, he cheated and that's rubbish. But he was a living complex human being who's not even been afforded dignity in death. Feel a bit sick reading these comments cheering it on."

Still, other commenters defended the decision, explaining it as a way for the mom to process her grief—just in an atypical way. Wrote Redditor u/darriage: "I mean yeah, it is immature and petty but she deserves to be able to do what she needs to in order to find peace with all of this. I bet it was cathartic for her, after a lot of pain. She's allowed that much."

Newsweek has reached out to U/One-Poetry9190 for additional comment.

Cemetery
Gravestones at London's Hyde Park pet cemetery, 2010. Oli Scarff/Getty Images