Internet Slams 'Control Freak' Husband Deciding Food Order for Every Woman

A woman raged against her friend's "control freak" husband who attempted to order rare steaks for every woman while at a restaurant.

Redditor IcePuzzleheaded5660 took to the site's popular AmITheA**hole forum to ask whether she overreacted while out at dinner with her friend.

She explained her friend's partner, 27, is a "typical old school" man, who "thinks men should order for women at restaurants and be the one to talk to the servers."

While it seems his "meek" wife is happy to have her choice made for her to "avoid conflict," IcePuzzleheaded5660 said the man tried to order for an entire group of women.

She explained: "It p***** me off to no end and I've told him several times not to do this for me as he has no idea what I'd want and that I think he is overstepping."

Despite his warning, when a waiter came the man decided what everyone would be eating.

The Redditor, from England, continued: "Our friend group was recently out eating and he tried to order for the table wanting everyone to get a steak and even stating they'd be served rare.

"I told the server to not mark that down and went around asking everyone specifically what they wanted off of the menu before plainly telling him I would not be eating steak and ordering the crab cakes for myself."

But her defiant act caused friction, as she continued: "In the end only one person besides my friend's husband got the steak and that was my friend.

"Later on she messaged me saying I'd made things very awkward and I should have just let him order for the table as he is now upset and feeling like I went out of my way to undermine him and embarrass him.

"I told her that he embarrassed himself by acting like a control freak, this upset my friend and she is not speaking to me currently, was I wrong to do this?"

The post, which has since been deleted, had racked up more than 12,000 upvotes after being shared on Wednesday, as people almost unanimously sided with IcePuzzleheaded5660, while expressing fears for her friend.

As the post blew up, she shared some more background details, revealing despite ordering for all the women, the man doesn't pay for them.

"He doesn't pay for anyone except him and his wife yet still thinks we should be honored he chose this dish for us," she said.

Sadly admitting she thinks his wife is "under his thumb," she said: "His behavior usually just draws stunned silence or 'Ums' but he'll push on until the order is taken and most people don't want to cause a scene. I'd had enough though and not above making a scene."

While she said: "I honestly hate rare steak, I know that's a controversial take but I can't eat it that way and I'm not a huge steak lover to begin with. The crab cakes were wonderful thank you!"

Weighing in on the situation, MaraiDragorrak commented: "Lol! In the regressive times that ordering for others was a thing, he would definitely be paying. Talk about wanting to have your cake and eat it too!"

Narnarqueen wrote: "Your friends could afford to grow some spines.. none of my friends would tolerate that type of controlling weirdness."

Dszquphsbnt thought: "This dude is living some sort of Mad Men fanfic life and it doesn't gel with reality."

Badger-of-Horrors reckoned: "This was weird 30 years ago. Dude belongs in the 1920s not 2020s."

AKlife420 said: "NTA. First, good for you for standing up to him and not letting him order for the table. Secondly, your friend needs a backbone."

Sad_Sherbet_7411 thought: "NTA. That is like the definition of controlling behavior and now he is taking it out on his wife. I mean how much louder can abuse be shouted here."

While Halseydota added: "NTA. What in the world is this dude's problem? What an obnoxious bully."

The Center for Family Justice indicates domestic abuse can take many forms, and usually manifests as "a pattern of coercive, controlling behavior that is a pervasive life-threatening crime affecting people in all our communities regardless of gender, age, sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, religion, social standing and immigration status."

There are emotional, psychological, economic and financial forms, as they said some of the signs include: "Telling you what to do or where you can and cannot go."

Newsweek reached out to IcePuzzleheaded5660 for comment.

Anyone seeking help should call The National Domestic Violence Hotline, a free and confidential hotline available 24/7 that can be reached on 1-800-799-7233 or TTY 1-800-787-3224.

The Hotline also provides information on local resources. For more information visit

Vintage photo of restaurant group.
Vintage photo of restaurant group. A man has been slammed for trying to order food for an entire group of women. George Marks/Getty Images

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