A woman claimed in a now-viral post that her boyfriend's mother tried to set her boyfriend up with someone else during Christmas dinner.
She shared her story in Reddit's "Am I The A**hole" forum on Tuesday under the username u/workStress339. In her post, the woman said that her boyfriend was very "unassertive" with his mother about the setup. Now, the couple is embroiled in an "ongoing argument."
So far, the post has racked up more than 8,400 upvotes. It has also received over 1,000 comments from Redditors who feel that a person should defend their partner against anyone, including a family member.
According to experts, however, standing up to a family member is easier said than done.
"From birth, we're on our family's 'team' [so] when a rift occurs between a romantic partner and the family, it can be damaging for all involved," relationship expert Amica Graber told Bustle.
"Don't expect your partner to automatically take your side. It can be hard for someone to stand up against their parents, especially if they've never set any boundaries with their family," Graber advised.
Still, experts agreed that couples should defend each other, even when it's hard. Not doing so, they said, could cause a relationship to falter.
"When your partner doesn't stand up for you, there's a chipping away at the foundation of trust in the relationship," a second relationship expert, April Masini, told Bustle.
"Being in a relationship means you can count on each other, but if they don't stand up for you, either in private or in public, there's a dissolution of trust, [which] allows negativity and anger to creep into the relationship," Masini concluded.
At the beginning of her post, u/workStress339 explained that her boyfriend's mother expressed wanting to invite the family's "single" and "pretty" neighbor over for New Year's. Her boyfriend attempted to tell his mother not to invite the neighbor, but u/workStress339 argued that her boyfriend didn't do enough.
"I think he should have chewed out his mom on Christmas for being petty and weird," she wrote.
Upset, u/workStress339 grabbed the dessert she brought and left.
The following day, u/workStress339 asked her boyfriend to have a "serious talk" with his mother, but he wasn't sure if that was the right thing to do. As a result, u/workStress339 made other New Year's plans and the two have been involved in an argument ever since.
As previously stated, Redditors were quick to slam u/workStress339's boyfriend.
"The only question is, 'Why are you still with this guy??' He seems to be missing his spine which, IMO, makes him a poor partner," wrote u/PeanutButlerChicken.
"[I]f bf can't step up and be yours by having your back he shouldn't get your dessert either," added u/namastebetches.
