Internet Torn Over Woman Who Won't Leave 'Carefree' Friend With Husband While Out of Town

What happens in Vegas may stay in Vegas but for one woman, a Nevada trip came with a big stipulation. The Redditor known as u/dadondada14 posted on "Am I the A**hole (AITA)," to get advice on whether her request was necessary.

"(36f) live with my husband and child. My best friend, Stacie (37f) has been staying with us the last few weeks while her home undergoes renovation," she wrote. "I met my best friend in college and we are pretty opposite when it comes to a lot of things. She's far more carefree, particularly with men. She loves dating committed men. Wives, fiancés, or girlfriend, she doesn't care and will pursue 'for the thrill'. There have been a couple occasions where she's been confronted publicly by spouses and she just laughs it off after the fact."

The woman stated that her friend is "flirtatious," but hasn't crossed the hard line with her husband. However, she has with a mutual friend's boyfriend. Now that the OP has plans to visit Las Vegas — where she'll be gone for five days — she isn't comfortable with the thought of her friend and husband left alone together.

According to The Infidelity Recovery Institute said that 55% of woman have an affair with a friend's spouse, while men tend to go for work colleagues. With that, the OP couldn't take any chances.

"I told her that I would prefer if she stayed elsewhere while I am gone," she explained. "She asked why and I told her it is because of her history of going after men in relationships and I wasn't comfortable with her there while I'm gone for so long."

Her friend became "defensive, hurt and started to cry," while insisting she treasured the friendship and wouldn't betray that. Still, the OP stuck to her guns.

"I held firm and said that this is just one of those things where I'd rather be safe than sorry," she said. "She'll be staying at another friend's house."

The post concluded with the woman saying that although she feels bad, this is how it has to be.

"My husband doesn't care either way and said she should understand why I feel that way, but my sister and a couple of our mutual friends said that I should trust her, and even if I don't, I should trust my husband," she added.

The viral post divided the internet. While some sided with the OP, others suggested she should trust her husband. The thread's top comment, by u/Scstxrn, summed up what many said.

"NTA. For people saying, 'Don't you trust your husband?'" they wrote, re-stating that, "you know she is a man eater who enjoys ruining committed relationships," and "he knows she is your friend."

They continued: "Why would you intentionally put him in a position where he has to ask her to leave while you are gone and tell you why he asked her? What if she made false accusations against him, either in response to him putting her out or another way to mess up your relationship? If she has changed, maybe this will be enough motivation for her to figure out why commitment to other people is such a turn on for her.

The comment with more than 11,000 upvotes added: "If she hasn't, NTA for proactively protecting your family - but I too wonder why you let her stay with you in the first place, given her total lack of shame previously."

Others, like u/OneMikeNation, chimed in to agree. "NTA: but why are you friends with someone who you believe will sleep with your husband," they wrote.

"Fellow husband here. I wouldn't even want to be forced into the situation to be frank; this sort of woman just begs for trouble and I wouldn't want to even risk the chance of a he says she says moment," u/isitthough20 said.

u/Spursfan14 added: "YTA, happy to tolerate her behavior when she's laughing about destroying other people's marriages but suddenly you see why it's unacceptable when it's yours? You're a hypocrite and she's obviously a sh*tty person."

Man and woman having dinner
Man and woman laughing over dinner. insta_photos/iStock / Getty Images Plus

Sometime later, one commenter noticed the woman had posted to another thread.

"Op mentions in another thread that she 'almost slipped up' and had sex with someone other than her husband on a recent Vegas trip, but that she resisted," they wrote. The thread has since been locked (however, this shows what was posted). It didn't stop others for pointing out the hypocrisy.

"OP Nta on this but a-hole in other ways and the fact that you laughed in that other wonder you're still friends with Ole girl. I hope you break out into a cold sweat DAILY," u/SoonShallBe said.

u/belzbieta gave the woman a little credit saying, "It gives good context though. It's likely she's projecting on her husband, and part of her feels he isn't trustworthy because she knows she's not fully trustworthy."

Though the Redditor was officially deemed "Not the A**hole," her bolded update explained that she spoke with her friend honestly.

"She said she's going to leave permanently because she doesn't feel welcome knowing she isn't trusted and she doesn't want to stay where she's not wanted," she wrote. "She went silent for what seemed like forever, then said, 'I think you did the right thing. If the situation was reversed, I would ask you to leave, too', then says again that she has issues and she's not sure why she does it."

At the end, the two "hugged it out" and the woman told her "I'll be here" while she works through the issues.