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By Jenni Fink
Senior Editor
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I worry that what I'm about to write is going to sound all too familiar to far too many women. And I worry about that because it's a systemic problem in America's health care.
Doctors diagnosing me with polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS) -- now called polyendocrine metabolic ovarian syndrome (PMOS) -- earlier may not have changed anything for me in terms of my family planning. And it obviously worked out fine. I mean, I'm a fertility doctor's dream patient. The process was successful every step of the way; I have a wonderful son and seven other embryos on ice for later.
But if I’d been diagnosed sooner, at least I wouldn't have spent years feeling insane as I screamed into the void that something was wrong with me, and no one was listening.
Before we get to the story, here’s a quick welcome to Mildy Maternal: Diary of a Work In Progress Mom, a weekly check in on how life is going as a new mom who wasn't sure she wanted to be a mom until she was told she couldn't get pregnant. If you’re not already following me on TikTok, Instagram, or Facebook, here’s a brief introduction.
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I’m a 34-year-old woman living in New York City with a 14-month-old and I am making my own rules for being a mom because I know nothing. As in, I never even held a baby before having a baby of my own (I know, I think my parenting scares my mom sometimes).
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For nearly my entire life, losing a few pounds was pretty simple. Cut down on carbs, get a good workout plan, and just get back on track. Within a few weeks, I'd be back to normal.
But, starting in 2019, it felt like nothing I did changed the scale, the way my clothes fit or how I felt about myself. I did Weight Watchers, macros, juice cleanses, gut microbiome tests, really anything I could think of. I'd gained 20 pounds and I was clueless as to why it happened or how to make it stop.
I went to doctors. A lot of them. Even a doctor that specialized in weight loss and nutrition. The conversation always started with me explaining that I'd been gaining weight and nothing I seem to do helps. Their answers became so predictable, it felt like they were reading a script.
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