Man Who Owns Home Charging Partner More Rent After Salary Increase Slammed

A man expecting his live-in partner to pay more rent after a pay rise is being blasted online.

In a post to Reddit's Am I the A******? (AITA), user u/No_Recognition7065 explained that they live in an apartment with their boyfriend.

The boyfriend owns the place, as it was given to him by his father, and the mortgage is fully paid off.

"The whole building was built 6 years ago and it's in a very popular area.," the poster wrote.

"I pay my boyfriend half of the market rate rent, which we update every year by looking how much the flats are being rented out for in the building complex.

Man and woman arguing in a kitchen
A stock photo of a man and woman arguing in a kitchen. The poster pays rent to their boyfriend, who owns their shared home. However, since receiving a pay rise, he expects the Redditor to pay more. PeopleImages/iStock/Getty Images Plus

"Which is a lot of money, but I agreed to it. Other than this, we did everything else 50-50 in the past."

However, No_Recognition7065 recently got a new job with a significant pay rise. So, the boyfriend wants them to split expenses proportional to their income, telling the poster it's "only fair."

"I told him I don't think it's fair that I should start paying for more, just because I got a new job and nothing else changed," they said.

"I already pay him rent—enough rent that would get me a same-sized flat a few streets away—so it's more than fair to him."

Young couple arguing in front of laptop
A stock photo of a young couple arguing over money in front of a laptop. It's common for financial disparity to impact a relationship, according to relationship expert Alexandra Mollon, fizkes/iStock/Getty Images Plus

After No_Recognition7065 refused to pay more, their boyfriend "made some very weak arguments" and accused them of "ripping him off."

"Now that I've calmed down a bit, I'm worried whether I'm in the wrong," the poster wrote.

"Especially since my best friend told me that this is how they do it with her boyfriend too, and my boyfriend owning the flat is irrelevant here. AITA?"

Reddit users backed the poster, with the story receiving over 23,000 upvotes and more than 7,000 comments.

Should Couples Split Their Bills 50/50?

According to somatic coach and relationship expert Alexandra Mollon, it's normal for income differences to cause tension in a relationship. However, it doesn't have to be a deal-breaker—as long as couples address the issue appropriately.

"I encourage my clients to handle financial disparity the same way I encourage them to handle everything else, as a problem to be solved as a team with compassion and love," she told Newsweek.

She said it's important to remember that what works for one couple might not work for another, and that no partner should feel taken advantage of.

"Some people split everything 50/50, some do it equitably, and some have unique solutions," she said.

"You and your partner get to discern what works best for you! Talk through what concerns you have, talk through what makes you nervous, what excites you, and work together to form agreements around handling money that feel good for both of you."

'He Is Using Her'

Fellow Redditors were outraged by the boyfriend's proposal, and urged No_Recognition7065 not to give in to his demands.

"Why are you paying rent to him if there is no mortgage payment or rent due?" asked kit0000033. "You're just giving him free money."

Yellowjacket1996 agreed, commenting: "She is paying all of his bills. he is using her."

Tight_Scallion_771 said: "He's accusing you of ripping him off because he is trying to rip you off."

RoRoRoYourGoat wrote: "He shouldn't be making a profit off his live-in girlfriend."

Schoobydoo42 called the arrangement "insane" and warned No_Recognition7065 that they are being "taken advantage of."

Travelynns said: "He's receiving free housing AND additional income from her in the form of her rent payments.

"I'm willing to bet he is only calculating his salary from his job as his income though..."

Frustrated woman sitting on a sofa
A stock photo of a frustrated woman sitting on a sofa in front of a window. The poster refused their boyfriend's request, but since speaking to a friend about the situation, they are having second thoughts. SB Arts Media/iStock/Getty Images Plus

Many users encouraged No_Recognition7065 to dump her boyfriend, with traumablades telling them: "Your boyfriend sucks."

"This shows his true character and it is not good," agreed Sust-fin.

"Why on earth is she putting up with that?" asked fakegermanchild. "I would tell my partner to go eat rocks if they asked that of me."

"Free yourself from this brat and get your own place," advised Far-Cup9063.

While DrunkInSpace commented: "He chose to be a landlord over being a boyfriend. She should ditch him in both roles."

Newsweek reached out to u/No_Recognition7065 for comment via Reddit. We could not verify the details of the case.

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