Man Praised for Refusing to Pay for Girlfriend's $700 Flight: 'Red Flag'

The internet has praised a man for telling his girlfriend she must pay for her own airplane ticket for an upcoming trip.

In a post on Reddit's popular r/AmITheA****** forum user u/Future_Tip_9572 explained that he has a vacation to Europe booked.

"I booked a two-week vacation to Europe about seven months ago, including flights and lodging," he explained. "My new girlfriend of five months said she wants to come with me. I told her I would love that but she'd have to pay for her own flight."

Couple argue over plane tickets
A file photo of a couple having an argument, left, and a close-up of someone holding airplane tickets, right. The girlfriend was told she would have to pay for her own flight. dikushin/Zhanna Danilova/Getty Images

He agreed that she could be included in his hotel arrangements and that he would pay for food, tours and attractions on the trip. But his girlfriend didn't take it well.

"She said she cannot afford the flight which costs about $700 since she is booking last minute," he said. "She asked me if I could buy her plane ticket and I told her I did not budget for another plane ticket, and that I thought it was already fair for me to pay for the other things on the trip for us."

His girlfriend said that she really wanted to spend the trip with him and that the flight could be her early anniversary and birthday gift, but the man refused.

"I told her I would love for her to come but I cannot buy her plane ticket because I did not budget for it and have other financial obligations," he wrote. "She said that I make more money than her and I should be able to afford it."

Frieda Birnbaum, a research psychologist and psychoanalytic therapist and author in Saddle River, New Jersey, told Newsweek: "Money is a very personal topic. People become resentful when their partner doesn't take turns paying or offer to help out.

"A couple is financially compatible when they respect the other person's habits surrounding money. It also helps if they come to a mutual agreement on how money is spent—for example for vacations, gifts, and expenses," she added.

Lots of Support

The woman was furious that her boyfriend refused to buy the plane ticket for her: "She told me to forget about it because I am acting selfish when we are supposed to be a partnership and said 'hopefully I will still be here when you get back'," said the poster.

In thousands of comments, Redditors reacted to the situation, overwhelmingly siding with the man.

"She wants to go on a free European vacation," said one commenter. "Her unwillingness to be reasonable is a huge red flag."

Another said: "NTA (not the a******). You simply didn't budget for it and you are being fair to offer to pay for other things. Safe travels and enjoy."

"It is a red flag when your partner is not sensitive to your financial needs," said Birnbaum. "If you're not willing to help your partner financially, then you should consider leaving the relationship before it becomes a bigger issue. If it's an issue at five months, consider how it might grow if you stay together for years."

Newsweek has reached out to u/Future_Tip_9572 for comment. We weren't able to verify the details of this case.

Have you noticed any red flags that made you end a relationship? Let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.