Man Refusing to Take Girlfriend to Wedding Over the 'Way She Looks' Backed

The internet has backed a man for refusing to take his girlfriend to a wedding because of her outfit.

In a post on Reddit's popular r/AmITheA****** forum, user u/OpportunityNice3227 asked the internet if he was "the a******" for refusing to take his girlfriend to the wedding "because of the way she looked."

The posted explained: "Two months ago I received an invitation to my boss' wedding. My girlfriend was going to be my plus one," explained the poster. "My girlfriend loves to dress up and wear short dresses and I love that, as long as she is comfortable I'm cool with anything."

Young woman at wedding
A file photo of a young woman smiling at a wedding. The internet has backed a man for refusing to take his girlfriend to a wedding because of her outfit. AaronAmat/Getty Images

But knowing that his boss and wife are very conservative, he warned her about the dress code.

"In the invitation, they asked for all men to wear black suits and the women to wear a long dress with long sleeves and no dramatic makeup," he said. "I talked about it with my girlfriend saying that it is ok if she doesn't come but as it is my boss I must go."

The girlfriend said this was fine and agreed to wear a long dress and light makeup for the wedding.

Pleased that his girlfriend would be coming with him, the man even helped to look for outfits that would comply with the dress code and purchased them.

But when the wedding came around, things didn't work out as planned.

"When I went to pick her up she was wearing the exact opposite of the dress code," said the poster. "She wore a short dress and dramatic makeup. Whilst she looked gorgeous—I told her so—I asked what happened to the other dress she was going to wear."

Tara Hill Hanover, a celebrity stylist and fashion expert, told Newsweek: "According to Southern Living, 'any well-mannered wedding guest takes special note of the wedding day's dress code and arrives outfitted appropriately' and I agree.

"This is the bride's special day; she and the groom get to dictate the wedding festivities and attire. If an invited guest does not agree with the dress code, they can respectfully decline the invitation," she added.

Difference of Opinion

Shocked, the boyfriend explained that she would need to change before they left for the wedding.

"She said that it's unreasonable and misogynistic to dictate what women should wear," he recalled. "I told her that it's the bride's wish and we should not disrespect it on her wedding day."

When he refused to leave until she changed, his girlfriend was not impressed: "She got mad and got out of the car saying she will not attend a misogynist's wedding. I said fine and drove off."

After the wedding, his girlfriend has not returned any of his phone calls and her friends were insulting him. Shocked by the ordeal, he took to the internet to ask, "AITA (am I the a******)?"

In over 2,000 comments, Reddit users overwhelmingly sided with the man and slammed the girlfriend for her behavior.

"NTA (not the a******)," said one reply. "This is practically a work event for you and she would possibly reflect poorly on you for not adhering to the dress code, especially since it sounds like the dress code was very clear."

"This was manipulative," said another. "She pretended to agree while planning on bulldozing you."

Another Redditor agreed and said: "The wedding wasn't about her, and showing up with her out of dress code would damage your relationship with your boss and thus career. She just didn't want to be told what to do and found an excuse."

"The boyfriend 100 percent made the correct decision in this situation," said Hill Hanover. "Showing up to a wedding in improper attire or dressed in any way to disrespect or take attention away from the bride is in bad taste. The fact that his girlfriend is now ignoring him may be a sign for him to look deeper into his relationship. In my opinion, this seems like a red flag about her character, as most people attend a wedding to celebrate the bride/groom not to be the center of attention, especially when they are the plus one."

Newsweek has reached out to u/OpportunityNice3227 for comment. We weren't able to verify the details of this case.

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