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By Melissa Fleur Afshar
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A 34-year-old woman's honest feelings about dating has struck a chord with other women on TikTok who are navigating the complexities of modern relationships.
Gabrielle Pedriani, who lives in Paris, took to the social media platform last month to share her disorienting experience of adjusting to life post-breakup.
The video, posted under the username @idiotinparis, has been viewed more than 18,000 times and captures Pedriani reflecting on what it is like to navigate relationships after years of identifying as "chronically single."
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"I feel like not enough people talk about what it's like to go through a breakup when you are typically single," Pedriani, who is originally from New York, told viewers. "I am someone who did not have a boyfriend until I was 27, and now I am 34. I consider myself chronically single—that means my identity is very caught up in being single."
Pedriani explained that her latest breakup, which she described as being extremely sudden and over text message, has left her "disoriented."
"When I am dating someone, I basically have to wake up and remind myself every morning that I am in a relationship, because I quickly forget—it is so not tied to my identity," she said. "Now what is so hard is that I grew a neural pathway to remind myself that I have a boyfriend, and I do not, so now I am just so disoriented."
She added: "I wake up in the middle of the night and I don't know which is real and which is a dream."
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Pedriani spoke with Newsweek about her perspective, describing the unique challenges faced by women who experience long periods of singledom before entering relationships.
"Dating in your 30s, when you have established not only a life of your own but coping mechanisms and a mental framework to validate that life in a society that does not validate it for you, is a unique experience," Pedriani, a public relations strategist, said. "I think there is a growing awareness that many women move through life largely single these days, and that there is a real appetite for content that speaks to the unique challenges—and benefits—that this poses when they do eventually date."
Pedriani's vulnerability has resonated with TikTok users, particularly women who have felt isolated during similar experiences. She credits social media for fostering a sense of community during her breakup, and for allowing others who can resonate with her story to connect with her.
"Oftentimes we will feel like we are going through something entirely alone, especially when our physical communities make us feel that way," Pedriani said.
Nicole Herway, a counselor based in Salt Lake City, agreed that societal shifts in relationship dynamics have contributed to this growing trend.
"Historically, marriage was a social and economic necessity," Herway of Herway Counseling told Newsweek. "Today, women are free to own property, run businesses, and have rights over their children without a partner. Having the freedom to choose is liberating but introduces new difficulties."
The counselor added that dating apps now present almost limitless potential partners to users across the globe. Still, she warned that this abundance can lead to analysis paralysis.
"The key is to strike a balance between the empowerment of choice and a realistic understanding of dating options," Herway said.
Pedriani emphasized that social media platforms, while often criticized, can play an essential role in helping people feel seen.
"I have been consistently surprised and comforted to see how supportive other women on social media have been during my breakup," she said. "While of course literature, film, and art help with this—most great art is made from heartbreak. If you ask me—there is a very tangible, human reality to the community we can find via social media if we use it consciously and vulnerably."
TikTok Users React
Herway agreed that women sharing their experiences on platforms like TikTok can provide vital support. Indeed, users on TikTok have responded positively to Pedriani's candid message.
"I could not relate more to what you are saying," one user wrote.
Another added: "Heavy relate! Also your skin looks amazing, would literally never suspect you are 34! Sending you love!"
"This is so well put! Sending you love," a third user posted.
A fourth user wrote: "Yeah this is so so relatable."
As Pedriani continues to adjust to single life, she reflected on the value in sharing her journey online.
"Many in my life don't understand why I share what I do on social media, but I find this support to be absolutely invaluable," she said.
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