Jenny Craig won't say what the company is paying for the privilege of making Monica Lewinsky skinny, but she sure looks like a million bucks. When Lewinsky arrived at the Hollywood premiere for "Three to Tango," she was almost unrecognizably svelte in a black pantsuit and fuchsia pashmina shawl. Jenny Craig says that reports of Monica's getting $10,000 for every pound she sheds--with the goal of dropping 100 altogether--are simply rumors. But the former presidential thong-model has evidently lost more than 30 pounds since starting the diet program this summer. If she keeps it up, that blue Gap dress will never fit her again.

Some magazines give you one feud of the Week. We give you three. The Wackiest: Marla Maples threatens to "tell the American people what he is really like" if ex-husband Donald Trump persists in his presidential aspirations. Trump retaliates by withholding a $1.5 million alimony payment, citing their confidentiality agreement. A state supreme court judge, undoubtedly wise to the fact that The Donald never kept anything confidential in his life, tells him to pay up. The Sexiest: Frederick's of Hollywood is suing New Line Cinema to stop a TV biopic about the company's founder, Fred Mellinger. The lingerie purveyor is actually worried the film will be too trashy. "There's a big difference between sensualness and sleazy," says spokesman Seth Jacobson. "We have to be careful about what's out there." The Pettiest: About to embark on a new morning TV show, Bryant Gumbel seems to dis former "Today" cohost Katie Couric by recalling her failed prime-time news show and her penchant for firing people. After his comment made him look uncharitable, Gumbel insisted, "I've never said one bad word about Katie and I never will." Notice he didn't say a nice word, either.

Why is Wall Street so surprised that Martha Stewart's IPO went through the roof? After all, she's been whipping up rich stocks for years, albeit the chicken and veal varieties. What's really shocking is that America's prissiest hostess agreed to go public on the same day as those Neanderthals from the World Wrestling Federation. Typical competitive Martha, she pinned those hulks to the mat anyway. Her stock closed the week up 95 percent (her personal take is valued at $1.2 billion), while the WWF managed only a 41 percent rise. Being a billionairess is indeed a good thing.

Hold on to your bubblegum, Backstreet boys and girls. Carlos Santana--at the tender age of 52--is back on top of the music world. More than 28 years after his last No. 1 album, Santana's "Supernatural" became the best-selling CD in the country last week. That return trip to the music summit breaks a record held by the Beatles for longest span between No. 1s. Santana is as amused as anyone by his late-blooming hipness, though the new album--a mix of Latin-based songs and rocking numbers featuring Lauryn Hill, Eric Clapton and Rob Thomas--is the very tip of hip. As Santana says, "Pretty good for an old geezer."