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By Newsweek Editors
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"That isn't going to happen." U.S. Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, on the possibility of an "Iranian-type government" in Iraq
"The Europeans should not think that we are Europeans. Our culture and environment are different from theirs." Nigerian President Olusegun Obasanjo, reacting to an EU monitoring team's charges of fraud in the recent election that gave him a second four-year term
"[They have] wrapped themselves in the American flag and swapped impartiality for patriotism." BBC director-general Greg Dyke, criticizing American television and radio networks for their "shocking" and "gung-ho" coverage of the war in Iraq
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"Our families know what we do, but we tell other people we just work in a restaurant or a guesthouse selling food and soft drinks." "Paddy," Afghan member of the bar staff at the Irish Club, the new--and only--bar in Kabul
"Here's a greeting for you from a chimpanzee: whoo whoo whoo, oogh oogh oogh oogh oogh oogh oogh oogh, ooh ooh, oooh, ooo." Primate expert and wildlife champion Jane Goodall, addressing the State Department. She is working with Secretary of State Colin Powell to fight deforestation
"Most people know you won't get SARS simply by drinking Sars." Chou Shiao-ping, spokesman for Taiwan's Hey Song Company, whose soft drink shares a name with the deadly virus
"When they go to the grocery store and buy foie gras in a tin, there is absolutely no thought of the geese. If my liver makes people talk about the issues then some good will come of it." Ingrid Newkirk, president of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA), who wants her body to be barbecued after her death
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