Redditor Called Wife Petty For Giving Their Son Her Maiden Name in Viral Post

A post on the Subreddit "Am I the A**hole" has gone viral and led to an online discussion about a child's last name after a man claimed his wife gave their son her maiden name following an argument.

The Redditor, going by u/00_throwaway, noted in his post, which received more than 11,000 votes, that he has a 16-year-old son from a previous marriage and contributes to a college fund for him with his son's grandparents. He explained that the issue arose when his pregnant wife of three years suggested they use money from the college fund to pay for a c-section delivery at a private hospital.

"I declined her request and refused to even negotiate," the Redditor wrote. "She complained about how I didn't seem to care about her or our son's wellbeing even though there was nothing to worry about in terms of health."

u/00_throwaway9 acknowledged that although there were risks associated with various medical procedures, he was confident in the quality of the local and free hospitals. However, she disagreed and insisted on having the baby in a private hospital.

"I tried reassuring her saying she will be fine but she argued that I have no idea what it's like and told me if I refuse to put money toward the cse then I shouldn't be surprised when she put her maiden name on our son's [birth certificate] instead of my family's name," u/00_throwaway9 wrote.

Shortly after their disagreement, the Redditor's wife had their baby at a local hospital, and he was not permitted to be there for the birth.

"I only saw my son when she came home and I was shocked to learn she went ahead and put her maiden name on the BC," the post said.

u/00_throwaway9 called her "petty" and "vengeful" in front of her family. The Redditor's wife's mother said while she didn't agree with what was put on the birth certificate, she told the Redditor that money could have been withdrawn to go toward the private hospital.

Birth Certificate
A Reddit post's comment section is split after the author called his wife petty for writing her maiden name on their newborn child's birth certificate following an argument. Comstock/Getty Images

When choosing the last name of a baby, there are pros and cons to any decision.

According to a piece published with BabyCenter, it isn't particularly common for a baby to receive their mother's last name, but there are some positives to that choice. One reason is if the other parent isn't involved in parenting. However, one of the drawbacks is that it may lead to some resentment coming from the partner's side of the family when they learn their family name is not passed on to a new generation.

u/00_throwaway9's post received several varying comments about the situation.

Many people wrote that because the money was specifically meant to go toward the Redditor's son's college tuition, it should not have been touched.

"She's also an AH for wanting to raid op's son's college account that's funded by not just his father but also the son's grandparents," one comment read. "People seem to be glossing over that money is not all from op and therefore is not his to divert for other reasons."

Others wondered whether the poster's wife kept her maiden name, or if their child would have a completely different name from the rest of the family.

However, some criticized u/00_throwaway9.

"Your wife is about to give birth to her first child, she is worried that the quality of health care that she will receive in this incredibly painful and vulnerable moment in her life is not good enough," one comment read.

The Redditor continued and wrote that u/00_throwaway9 did not take her concerns seriously or try to find the money for the private hospital.

Another person, echoing the sentiment, wrote that while the poster was not wrong for refusing to pull money out of the college fund, "he didn't even attempt to compromise or discuss it or take his wife's concerns seriously."

Many claimed there was blame to be shared among everyone involved.

"Yeah, I agree she has no right to your son's college fund. She should not have asked for it, and you're well within your rights to refuse it too," a comment read. "But is [it] your responsibility as a husband and father to give a yes/no answer to a situation? Or is it to try and find a solution to your wife's concerns?"