How Do We Loathe 'Sex and the City's' Jack Berger? Let Us Count The Ways

Sex and the City's Carrie Bradshaw (Sarah Jessica Parker) had her fair share of rogue, tempestuous relationships over the years, but fellow writer Jack Berger (Ron Livingston) was categorically the worst person she ever dated.

From his incessant whining about his failed book, to his lack of support for Carrie's career; there were so many red flags that she failed to recognise (or chose to ignore) until it was too late.

And although Mr. Big (Chris Noth) was hardly a shining example of a loving, committed partner and she went on to date the also questionable Aleksandr Petrovsky (Mikhail Baryshnikov), she certainly did not deserve Berger - nor, arguably, did viewers.

So, how do we loathe Jack Berger? Let us count the ways...

1. He has a girlfriend when he starts flirting with Carrie

The pair initially met ahead of Carrie's book release party in Season 5, Episode 5, after being introduced by their publisher. While a bit of harmless flirtation can be okay, he spent the whole afternoon with her and even asked her to come with him to the dry cleaners so they didn't have to end their time together - all without mentioning the fact he had a girlfriend.

It was only when Carrie went to invite him as her plus one to the party that he awkwardly confessed, explaining that his partner's family were in town that night. Carrie then brought it up at breakfast with The Girls to dissect why he didn't offer the information up sooner, and they were pretty much all in agreement that his behaviour was shady, to say the least.

2. He's still hung up on his ex even when they do get together

While Berger initially showed some promise, it soon became evident he was not over his ex, Lauren. Not only did he mention her at any given opportunity (okay, we get it; she decorated your flat), he then proceeded to swear at the answering machine and flip the bird in response to her message.

Despite being smitten with him, even Carrie saw this behaviour as problematic and questioned how someone you once loved could evoke such a negative, impassioned reaction.

As online psychologist Dr. Jonathan Pointer tells Newsweek: "It is healthy to appreciate one's exes' qualities and to speak of them from a place of compassion and appreciation, however, this needs to be done in a way that is thoughtful of the impact that it may have on one's current partner.

"In other words, if it becomes the center of almost every conversation, then it has become more of an unhealthy obsession with idealising their ex, at the expense of minimising their current partner's own qualities and contributions."

3. He's insecure beyond belief

Yes, his latest book was a bit of a dud and yes, he later got dropped by his publishers as a result, but even before that point Berger took his shortcomings out on Carrie.

Things really came to a head after he asked her to read the novel. She devoured it in a few days and was full of praise for his characters and the piece as a whole - her one bit of negative feedback being that his female protagonist went around New York City wearing a hair scrunchie.

Most people would have taken this minor bit of criticism - if you can even call it that - on the chin. But not Berger. Oh, no! He sulked all evening and made Carrie feel as though she'd done something horrific.

Which leads us to our next point...

4. He steals Carrie's pudding and insults her hat

So this may be more on the trivial side, but it's noteworthy nonetheless.

Miffed that Carrie brought up the scrunchie (and that her point was proven in the restaurant that same night), he not only acted like a petulant child over the course of the evening, he went on to help himself to her dessert without asking.

After the meal, during an explosive row about Scrunchiegate, he even attacked her "fab-u-lous" fashion choices just to get back at her.

Cardinal sins, by all accounts.

5. He doesn't support Carrie creatively

As many artists will confess; it is hard to be romantically involved with someone who is also a creative.

"If they [the couple] were to compare themselves to each other, as a way of attempting to calculate whether they were of equal value, then this could lead to some level of despair, for at least one of the partners," Dr. Pointer says.

"Instead, each partner needs to focus on their own intrinsic self-worth and that of their partner, and understand that self-worth is not based upon external successes. They can also remind themselves that it is healthy to celebrate each other's successes, and find pleasure in this."

Ultimately, you are supposed to support your partner through the good times and the bad. Your career will ebb and flow, and there'll be times you have to take setbacks on the chin. If you cannot celebrate the successes of your partner - regardless of how terrible your own work is going - then you should not be in a relationship at all.

6. He's insensitive towards sweet, sweet Charlotte

After Harry broke up with Charlotte, the women at her local synagogue set her up on various dates with their sons. On one particularly bad blind date, she ran into Carrie and Berger, and asked her pal to get her out of the situation.

No stranger to bad dates, Carrie followed protocol and called Charlotte when she was back at her table to say something bad had happened. When Charlotte later joined the couple at their table, not only was it clear that she'd interrupted them mid-fight, Berger insensitively called out Charlotte's behaviour, overlooking the fact that she was still heartbroken about Harry.

7. He breaks up with Carrie via Post-it note

Not only did Berger tell Carrie he needed to take a break from their relationship (despite the fact they'd only been together for a short while), he then convinced her he was ready to go full steam ahead upon his return to the Big Apple - before sneaking out of her apartment and breaking up with her via Post-it note. The brutal handwritten message read: "I'm sorry, I can't. Don't hate me." That's it.

Now, granted they hadn't been a couple for very long, but that is no way to treat any person, let alone someone you are romantically involved with. They were both well into their thirties by this point and he should have been mature enough to face her in person and talk things through.

Jack Berger SATC
Jack Berger (played by Ron Livingston) was Carrie Bradshaw's (Sarah Jessica Parker) boyfriend in "Sex and the City." We delve into all the way his character proved to be one of the worst in the entire show. HBO

Psychotherapist Dr. Akua Boateng explains: "Breaking up with a person is emotionally challenging. While many would desire to avoid this conversation, it shows care and accountability to your partner to do so. Berger showed that he did not have the capacity to face the emotional act of breaking up. At times, people do not move toward this because of fear of conflict, rejection or negative recourse.

"Emotional avoidance can be damaging to your partner as well as yourself. A break up conversation can provide closure, clarity and emotional care for the person that you have invested in. At times, people do not move toward this because of fear of conflict, rejection or negative recourse."

Under different circumstances, perhaps Jack Berger would have been a half-decent boyfriend to Carrie, but as it stands, he continually overlooked her needs in the relationship, was emotionally draining throughout and made her feel as though she needed to downplay her own achievements to protect his ego.

To make matters worse, he featured so heavily in the final season of the original show that fans couldn't help but differently would things have turned out if Carrie hadn't wasted so much time "b**gering Berger"?

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