'So Embarrassing': Internet Slams Man Who Confronted Wife Over 'Messy' House

A man has taken to social media following a spat with his wife over their "messy" house. The man was reportedly embarrassed after bringing a group of work friends to his home and finding it in a state of disarray—despite it being primarily his stay-at-home wife's job to keep the house tidy.

The post has drawn criticism from readers, racking up over 8,000 upvotes and 4,500 comments since it was shared in Reddit's "Am I The A**hole" forum on Wednesday.

When couples choose to have one spouse work and the other stay at home, the division of labor within the household can often become a source of conflict. According to Parents magazine, compared to 2019, 2021 saw a 60 parents increase in the number of stay-at-home parents in the U.S., due in large part to the pandemic.

As of early 2021, 2.4 percent of parents stayed home with their kids, a dramatic increase from the pre-pandemic level of 1.5 percent.

The anonymous, 36-year-old man (known as u/Throwawaynes767) began his post by explaining that he is his household's "breadwinner," while his wife is a stay-at-home parent to their three young children.

Because their kids often make a mess, the man told his wife that "she doesn't have to clean up all the time." Instead, he said "that she only has to make sure the house is clean when [they] have guests over," and she agreed.

"Well, the other day I brought over some friends from work and when I opened the door all I could see was an utter mess, food and toys and clutter everywhere," he wrote. "I was shocked...and just mortified that my friends saw my home looking like this."

"I took the guests into the least messy part of the house and my friends kept giving me weird looks and making indirect comments about the state of home," he continued.

Once the work colleagues left, the man, "livid" at his wife, "went into the bedroom to see that [she] was actually sleeping."

"I woke her up to ask why she didn't tidy up the house knowing I was going to bring friends over," he said. His wife reportedly told him that she hadn't seen the text he had sent to alert her and therefore didn't know he would be bringing guests over.

She explained that "she wasn't feeling well and had a headache so she thought of getting an hour-long nap." He, however, did not accept this explanation: "I told her that it was so so embarrassing that the house looked like this when my friends came over and that this was avoidable had she cleaned up and prepared the house for the guests."

She countered by saying that it was his fault "for not checking twice with her and making sure the house was ready for guests."

Ultimately, the man's wife called him "a jerk" and she "walked out of the room."

Readers were angered by the man's post and quickly sided with his wife.

"I would say he treats her like an employee, but even employees get time off when they're sick without being berated and essentially called lazy," said u/Emotional_Answer_646.

"I agree with everything your wife said," wrote u/Mamertine. "You should have guaranteed she knew that you were inviting people over."

"You should've had an actual conversation with your wife. Then you'd have known she wasn't feeling well and you would've known not to invite guests," echoed u/emc2. "It honestly sounds like you don't have a lot of respect for your wife."

Newsweek reached out to u/Throwawaynes767 for comment.

 Messy House
On Reddit, a man went viral after saying he criticized his wife for not cleaning their home before guests came over. The internet came to the defense of the stay-at-home mom of three young children. Motortion/iStock / Getty Images Plus